About MiiDaisy : I'm only here tp read fml's, its really an entertaining app so perfectly to use when im bored.
Some stuff about me,
Im currently studying for my bachelor of nursing and already in my 3rd year. I love 2 draw and to read books. Also gaming and watching anime is one of my favorite things 2 do.
Xx
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Beginner
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Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24924) - you deserved it (79443)
On 07/14/2011 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by gir - United States (Tennessee)
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting it on for the first time. Just as I was about to climax, I spotted my greatest fear, a big wasp, only a few inches away from me. I shuddered and made a very unmanly orgasm wail. She now refuses to have sex because she says I "turned her off forever". FML
I agree, your life sucks (31953) - you deserved it (8162)
On 06/07/2011 at 4:07pm - intimacy - by Punk (man) - United States
Today, I dragged my son along with me to a work party because I didn't want him home by himself. Halfway through, he stood up and made an announcement about my pregnancy. I had to explain to all my coworkers and my boss that I'm not pregnant, I'm just fat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26696) - you deserved it (7367)
On 03/20/2011 at 12:26am - kids - by embarassed - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me with my best friend. I texted her and I would never talk to her again. But I accidentally sent it to my other best friend, who responded, "I'm so sorry, I never meant for you to find out". My two best friends cheated with my boyfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47997) - you deserved it (3377)
On 02/12/2011 at 12:19am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by creating an account on Runescape; his favorite game. After finding him in-game, I started talking to him, not revealing who I was. After a while, I asked him if he had a girlfriend. He promptly said no and asked me for nude pics. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45016) - you deserved it (12153)
On 02/09/2011 at 2:22pm - love - by Samyett (woman) - United States
Today, and even at this very moment, my ex, who I'm still in love with, is having sex with her new boyfriend. He's my neighbor and she's making a lot more noise with him than she did with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34307) - you deserved it (4988) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 02/05/2011 at 1:29am - intimacy - by homerde - Sent from mobile version
Today, I bought a pretty blue parakeet to keep my parrot company, and named her Sky. I went to work a few hours later. When I came home that night, I found my parrot dead. There wasn't a huge mess to clean, though; Sky had already eaten half of his corpse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24326) - you deserved it (5399)
On 02/04/2011 at 7:29pm - misc - by omnomnom (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I met my daughter's boyfriend, who she hopes to marry. I asked what he does, to which he answered, "I'm a Flamencologist." Flamencology? The study of Flamenco? Huh? FML
I agree, your life sucks (17672) - you deserved it (5107)
On 02/04/2011 at 10:01am - kids - by dancer101 (woman) - United States
Today, I noticed that after a month of using my gel, it never seems to empty. I then found out my older brother and his friends had been pumping their man-juice into it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (58888) - you deserved it (4914)
On 02/04/2011 at 9:08am - intimacy - by theish -
Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (60031) - you deserved it (5176)
On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I got chickenpox. I'm 28 and having chickenpox as an adult is excruciatingly painful. When I told my boss I wasn't going to be at work today because of chickenpox he replied, "That's the worst excuse I've ever heard. Adults don't get chickenpox." He then fired me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33287) - you deserved it (2309)
On 02/03/2011 at 10:19pm - health - by Pox (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my boyfriend tickled me. In between laughs, I warned him that I was going to pee myself. He didn't believe me. After I actually did, he suggested we use a "safety word" from now on so that he will know when I'm being serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19642) - you deserved it (3262)
On 01/23/2011 at 9:47pm - misc - by embarrassed2 (woman) - United States
Today, I was doing karaoke with my girlfriend's family, when the 5 year old came over and shut off my microphone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14594) - you deserved it (6004)
On 01/23/2011 at 12:47am - misc - by shadowfigure (man) - United States (Alaska)
Today, my girlfriend, who's on a diet, refused to give me a blow job because my sperm would "add useless calories" to her day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29877) - you deserved it (10188)
On 01/22/2011 at 7:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my girlfriend was going down on me, when I heard my dog start growling. He must have thought my girlfriend was hurting me, because out of nowhere and before I could do anything, he attacked her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24986) - you deserved it (4602)
On 01/22/2011 at 4:24pm - intimacy - by ohsnap (man) - United States (New York)
Monday 17 June 2013
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