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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Midget9

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Midget9
  • Town/Country : United States of America
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 448
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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Midget9's favorite FMLs

Today, I sat on the kitchen counter in my boxers for ten minutes running my feet under hot water. Why? Because my dad thought it would be funny to superglue my feet together. FML

#18491637 (151)

I agree, your life sucks (9018) - you deserved it (820)

On 12/12/2011 at 1:38am - misc - by lucas - United States (Alaska)

Today, my cat took a shit in my toaster. FML

#15852262 (332)

I agree, your life sucks (40091) - you deserved it (6001)

On 04/19/2011 at 10:21pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got a call from my five-year-old son's principal, my son had pooped in the school yard then gave the teacher a ziploc bag and commanded her to pick it up. He said he was trying to imitate our dog. FML

#15328400 (138)

I agree, your life sucks (28737) - you deserved it (4223)

On 03/15/2011 at 10:05pm - kids - by anonymous -

Today, I was at the doctors office after throwing up for the past week. My diagnosis? Apparently I'm the first pregnant man. After about minutes of freaking out and explaining on how it was possible, he told me he was joking and that I'm fine, but my reaction was best thus far. FML

#13787466 (155)

I agree, your life sucks (35731) - you deserved it (12164)

On 11/10/2010 at 5:28am - health - by youreajoker (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was waiting to take a dump in a gas station restroom. A 300 pound man walked out, shook his head, and said "I'm sorry" to me. FML

#13675906 (126)

I agree, your life sucks (24480) - you deserved it (2188)

On 11/01/2010 at 3:39pm - misc - by mr_p - United States (Illinois)

Today, I started to type up a mass text to tell a decent amount of my friends that I'd just come home to a surprise from my boyfriend. Trying to fix a typo, I accidentally hit send with the text only saying "Guess what?! I just came." FML

#9070560 (245)

I agree, your life sucks (16817) - you deserved it (7203)

On 03/14/2010 at 10:49am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I performed in my school play. Right before my big solo, I noticed a few girls changing backstage and I became aroused. The play was Jesus Christ Superstar, and I was playing Jesus. All I was wearing was a little cloth, so the whole audience saw Jesus get hard during the crucifixion. FML

#981592 (250)

I agree, your life sucks (77396) - you deserved it (28876)

On 04/14/2009 at 11:27pm - intimacy - by jizzlemonster13 (man) - United States (New York)