About Mideoyeo : Hello,
I am a pirhana, I do nip at people who tend to annoy the crap out of me so don't make me angry or start stupid arguments with me or else you WILL get a stick shoved up your ass. Besides threatening people I'm usually very nice, so have fun getting to know me.
P.S I LOVE ZELDA.
And a last side note, if you cannot construct proper English sentences I will chew you, swallow you and then regurgitate you back up. Of course if English isn't your first language I'll understand and give you a hug instead. C:
Toodles~
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
50 quality responses
Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.
Today, I discovered that I have been falsely accusing my sister of stealing my makeup. How do I know this? Because I found said makeup in the trunk of my boyfriend's car, next to a bag that had fishnet tights and red stilettos in it. Oh, and the stilettos are his size, in case you were wondering. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23544) - you deserved it (1804)
On 08/03/2012 at 2:22am - misc - by SingleAgain (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, at my job, an old lady kept calling her inhaler a blow job. I kindly explained to her why she couldn't call her inhaler that. She continued to ask me for a blow job in front of visitors. I had to say yes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19590) - you deserved it (1523)
On 07/27/2012 at 12:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I was swimming in my pool with my two sons. A few hours later while on Facebook, I saw that one of them had liked a photo with the caption, "Peeing in a pool, best feeling ever." FML
I agree, your life sucks (15383) - you deserved it (1642)
On 07/23/2012 at 12:28am - kids - by poolboy -
Today, I saw my best friend, who's a cop. He was dressed up in regular clothes and with six other guys. I said, "Officer T.? Didn't you have work today?" Turns out he was undercover, and I blew his investigation. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14036) - you deserved it (29667)
On 07/01/2012 at 4:45am - misc - by immabitch - United States
Today, my friend showed off her new tattoo, which is supposed to say "bad bitch" in Italian, and I had to point out that it actually says "defective female". Her response was to cuss me out and inform me that I'm no longer part of her social circle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20524) - you deserved it (2210)
On 06/21/2012 at 4:28pm - misc - by tubby (woman) - Sweden (Blekinge Lan)
Today, I brought my girlfriend home for dinner. The first words out of my dad's mouth were apparently, "Ah, you must be Dan's slam-piece." I was in the living room and didn't quite catch it all, but I said, "She certainly is!" Now I'm single, and all my friends think I'm a bastard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16071) - you deserved it (6942)
On 06/21/2012 at 2:19pm - love - by igiveup (man) - United States
Today, I decided to motivate myself to workout by looking at a picture of a guy with a six-pack on my computer screen while doing abs. My dad walked in after I finished and was still breathing heavily from working out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18039) - you deserved it (4807)
On 06/16/2012 at 1:45am - misc - by NotGay (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I went to my girlfriend's house to break up with her. It was a hard decision and both of us became quite emotionally overwhelmed at the time. We began to hug as a final goodbye, then her mum burst in the room and yelled, "HE FINALLY PROPOSED!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (29343) - you deserved it (2413)
On 06/03/2012 at 10:21am - love - by Matt - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my daughter was still acting out her teenage issues. This morning, when I told her to, "Have a nice day" she screamed at me, "DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (23176) - you deserved it (3054) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 05/30/2012 at 6:41pm - kids - by Aldoch -
Today, I was browsing the web on my boyfriend's laptop, when I idly clicked a bookmark. It turned out to be his private blog, where he most recently spoke in very creepy detail about his efforts to make me love him, remarking that, "Soon, I'll plant my seed in her breeding hips." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28061) - you deserved it (3450)
On 05/22/2012 at 4:49pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I found out my best friend was having a birthday party and I wasn't invited, so I asked her why. She replied, "what birthday party?" It was a surprise birthday party. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11677) - you deserved it (17919)
On 05/15/2012 at 10:13am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I shut my finger in the car door. The door locked. Then I dropped the keys on the ground and couldn't reach them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24283) - you deserved it (1772)
On 05/06/2012 at 12:09am - health - by catherineratley - United States (Illinois)
Today, I decided to pull some weeds in my backyard. Everything was going great until I got a concussion. My dog thought that it would be fun to headbutt me from a running start. Twice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15022) - you deserved it (1706)
On 04/09/2012 at 11:50pm - animals - by Lee (woman) - United States
Today, I tried to impress my girlfriend by vaulting over the side of a stairway rail parkour-style. Now I feel like I almost broke my legs, and judging by her hysterical laughter, she considers me more of a fool than a stud. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4283) - you deserved it (18394)
On 03/23/2012 at 7:51pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, my fiancé and I decided to have a romantic rendezvous on the trampoline in our backyard. Or at least it was romantic, until I accidentally rolled off and all but crushed our dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8319) - you deserved it (10590)
On 03/18/2012 at 3:18pm - love - by Jacklyn - United States (Illinois)
Monday 20 May 2013
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