Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MembraneEight

Search for a member

MembraneEight
  • Town/Country : United States of America
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 335
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

MembraneEight's last visitors

dotar

MembraneEight's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of MembraneEight's badges

MembraneEight's favorite FMLs

Today, at around 2am, I was walking through a parking lot to my car when a man walking behind me told me not to be scared. I turned around to tell him there was no problem. He was naked. FML

#18991669
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29347) - you deserved it (2572) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/04/2012 at 11:39am - misc - by DarkDolly - France

Today, I was apparently tired enough to spray silly string under my armpits rather than deodorant. FML

#18920760
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18026) - you deserved it (5675)

On 01/26/2012 at 10:22pm - misc - by ParkerRommel (man) - United States

Today, I found out that my boyfriend is a Mormon, when his mother greeted me saying how happy she was her son had found himself a Mormon girlfriend. I know nothing about Mormonism, except from what I've seen on South Park, and I'm an atheist. FML

#18830961
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26344) - you deserved it (5391)

On 01/17/2012 at 12:05am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I came out to my father. He seemed to be totally okay with it, as long as I'm the "man" in my relationships. FML

#18825436
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25539) - you deserved it (8172)

On 01/16/2012 at 2:55pm - love - by anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got a Facebook message from the school genius/nerd, who I have never talked to. He politely informed me that after much thought and deliberation, he has narrowed it down to who his ideal mate is. Me. FML

#18819143
425 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24913) - you deserved it (6034)

On 01/15/2012 at 10:30pm - love - by geeklove - United States (North Carolina)

Today, after a hard day on the wards as a trainee doctor, I went home and started getting frisky with my girlfriend. All I could think about was the anatomical names for what I was touching and doing. I felt physically sick. FML

#18793525
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25317) - you deserved it (3654)

On 01/13/2012 at 5:47am - intimacy - by doctorsandnurses (man) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML

#18733573
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19012) - you deserved it (37896)

On 01/07/2012 at 5:27am - intimacy - by Danny - Australia

Today, my therapist told me, "I'm sorry, but I'm not qualified to handle your level of instability." FML

#18725353
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33846) - you deserved it (4137)

On 01/06/2012 at 11:16am - health - by Ixi_the_pixie - United States

Today, I was going over to my friend's house for the first time. A creepy-looking old man answered, and smiled at me. I asked "Is this the right house? Does Isaac live here?" He replied "Yes, he's in the basement. Would you like a drink?" Right then, Isaac called and asked me where I was. FML

#18671217
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45077) - you deserved it (3117)

On 01/01/2012 at 2:34am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my girlfriend decided to raid my games collection and try her hand at Amnesia: The Dark Descent. Two hours later, despite my best attempts to make her stop shrieking like a dying crackhead every two minutes, two cops showed up at the door with our neighbors in tow. FML

#18657725
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20543) - you deserved it (2398)

On 12/30/2011 at 9:43pm - misc - by axel519 (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend referred to her yeast infection as "making bread." I can never look at bread the same way. FML

#18623921
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21814) - you deserved it (2549)

On 12/27/2011 at 10:15am - health - by themuffinman (man) - Japan

Today, I experienced the most intense pain I have ever had in my life. I was eating blueberries when my sister made a comment which sent me into hysterics. The force of having a bullet-like berry violently shoot out your nostril is more painful than it sounds. FML

#18617176
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22421) - you deserved it (3539)

On 12/26/2011 at 4:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after a long therapy session, in which I poured out all my feelings of how happy and in love I am with whom I believe to be my soul-mate, my shrink asked me if I was sure this guy wasn't a figment of my imagination. FML

#18576133
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23890) - you deserved it (3076)

On 12/22/2011 at 12:50am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I woke up with Skittles super glued to my forehead. FML

#18561350
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22971) - you deserved it (4228)

On 12/20/2011 at 12:48pm - misc - by awalc - United States

Today, I dropped my 7-year-old son off at school. He decided to have fun and step out of my car screaming "Stranger danger" while running away and pointing at me. I then had to get out of my car to shut the door he'd left wide open. This caused 20 other kids to scream "Stranger danger" as well. FML



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: