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MellyBee

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MellyBee
  • Town/Country : Montreal, Canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 June 1988 (25 years)
  • Number of visits : 1885
  • Number of comments : 28
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 5 posted

About MellyBee : I have red hair.

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MellyBee's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband sent me a text before heading home from work. All it said was, "Need a fuck. Backed up to hell. You're about to shower face first in a fire hydrant." Love you too, hun. FML

#20466497
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29554) - you deserved it (5169)

On 01/18/2013 at 3:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I walked into my mother's house to find that she had knitted clothes for some of the household appliances. The toaster was wearing a dress. FML

#20457945
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27693) - you deserved it (3048)

On 01/13/2013 at 10:00pm - misc - by anon - United States (Ohio)

Today, while having sex with my girlfriend on the bathroom floor, I felt something tickle my balls. I looked back to see her sister's kitten getting in on the action. I think I just had my first threesome. FML

#20456674
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44667) - you deserved it (7706)

On 01/13/2013 at 3:53am - intimacy - by Drewbie (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I asked my mom what her biggest craving was when she was pregnant with me. Her answer: an abortion. FML

#20449894
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47722) - you deserved it (4601)

On 01/09/2013 at 11:07am - misc - by kk - United States

Today, I unknowingly used my shampoo thinking it was leave-in-conditioner. While walking to work, it started to rain. I started to produce suds. FML

#20443594
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9288) - you deserved it (22048)

On 01/05/2013 at 10:59am - misc - by nomegusta (woman) - United States

Today, my roommate stumbled in drunk at 5am with 3 Big Macs, and passed out on the floor after eating them. This happens almost every night. I stay in, study, work, and go to the gym almost everyday. And she still has better grades, a better body, and makes more money than me. FML

#20436604
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46131) - you deserved it (3505)

On 01/01/2013 at 4:00pm - misc - by apparentlythereisnokarma - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I can hear my flatmate masturbating loudly and asking himself if he likes it. And replying. FML

#20436012
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46790) - you deserved it (3488)

On 01/01/2013 at 10:20am - intimacy - by ashbeat - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my girlfriend and I went to the cinema. Or rather, she went with her other boyfriend, and I happened to see them there. FML

#20429745
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42257) - you deserved it (2686)

On 12/29/2012 at 10:50am - love - by awkward. (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, my boyfriend ended sex by yelling, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and using his foot to push me off the bed. FML

#20417691
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51207) - you deserved it (9253)

On 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm - intimacy - by Saradee (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that storing a partially empty bowl of ice cream in the freezer overnight along with the spoon, and then trying to take a bite the next day, can have the same effect as sticking your tongue on a flagpole in the middle of winter. FML

#20195063
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5278) - you deserved it (24376)

On 12/07/2012 at 12:06pm - misc - by Moose (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, drunk at a party, I leaned through a window to throw up. I was outside. FML

#20182175
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7932) - you deserved it (26340) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 11/28/2012 at 1:20am - health - by kise - Sent from mobile version

Today, I realized the number of cats I currently have is higher than the number of guys I've ever dated. FML

#20169381
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15704) - you deserved it (14616)

On 11/19/2012 at 11:15am - animals - by crazycatlady (woman) - United States

Today, a homeless man asked me for some money to eat. He ate the five dollars I gave him. FML

#20161582
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21978) - you deserved it (3360)

On 11/13/2012 at 6:34am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my 13-year-old son discovered Axe. Axe shower gel. Axe shampoo. Axe body spray. All at once. FML

#20130811
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23616) - you deserved it (2014)

On 10/24/2012 at 1:15am - kids - by BobsBabe2 - United States



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