MellyBee

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MellyBee

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 June 1988 (28 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4623
  • Number of comments : 28
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 5 posted

About MellyBee : I have red hair.

MellyBee's page activity

Visits<b>eski2015</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 4:04pm<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 5:24am<b>max367</b> - the 04/20/2016 at 11:27am<b>Rich531</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 8:45am<b>imasd</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 1:53pm<b>Jrsmommy2014</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 8:25am<b>Druu</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 11:21am<b>mikuxxhatsune</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 1:18am<b>nottheuglyfriend</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 2:25pm<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 8:58pm<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 11:29pm<b>theFickleFinger</b> - the 11/18/2015 at 5:04pm<b>britbear0731</b> - the 11/17/2015 at 2:36pm<b>jelrid</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 7:32am<b>Tacogamer20</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 5:00pm<b>yackieegx</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 9:03pm<b>ToxicTyrael</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 3:15pm<b>Ins3rtEpicName</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 7:20am

Fucked!<b>eski2015</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 10:04pm<b>nottheuglyfriend</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 8:25pm<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 2:58am<b>jelrid</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 1:32pm<b>cdncw</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 11:35pm

MellyBee's FML badges

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I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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MellyBee's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband and I were at the mall, and decided to have a snack at the food court. As we ate, an obese woman squeezed past our table, butt facing us. Just when her ass-cheeks slid past our heads, she let out a horrific fart that my father would be proud of. FML

by whipplewhip / 06/30/2013 at 12:21am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I've come to the conclusion that my phone addiction is getting out of control after I typed my PIN code into the microwave. FML

by Anonymous / 06/29/2013 at 10:57am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I bumped into my parents at the mall. They didn't tell me they were around. I live 5,000 miles away, in a different country from them. FML

by Coolios / 06/24/2013 at 10:16am / United Arab Emirates (Dubai) / Miscellaneous

Today, while working the graveyard shift at my hotel, it felt a little chilly, so I grabbed a blanket out of the box we usually store old blankets in. 20 minutes later, the live-in maintenance man casually remarked that those blankets are all infected with bed-bugs. FML

by Anonymous / 06/23/2013 at 12:10am / United States (Washington) / Work

Today, I caught my 16-year-old daughter and her boyfriend trying to use a latex glove as a condom. FML

by whatno / 06/19/2013 at 7:40pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my husband was in our newborn's room, holding and talking to him. I guess he forgot the baby monitor, because I overheard him say, "Wanna know a secret? Daddy kills people." I really hope he was just quoting Dexter. FML

by imarriedanaxemurderer / 06/18/2013 at 1:01am / United States (Illinois) / Kids

Today, I went to a bar for some drinks. A guy looked me up and down, gave me a suggestive smile, then asked for my name and number. I'd have been a little less creeped out if he hadn't been standing beside me at the urinal the whole time. FML

by Sovekipisse / 06/15/2013 at 6:24pm / France (Pays de la Loire) / Love

Today, my boyfriend dumped me, accusing me of lying to him about "being a hermaphrodite". His almost total lack of knowledge about female anatomy led him to believe that my clitoris is actually an extremely tiny penis. FML

by Hannah / 06/13/2013 at 12:19pm / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

by tinypenis / 06/04/2013 at 8:15am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I witnessed a large woman pee on a pregnancy test in the middle of a Walmart parking lot, clean herself off, then wander around with the test hanging out of her mouth, waiting for her result. Where in the name of Christ do these people come from? FML

by Anonymous / 06/02/2013 at 2:10pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I turned 35. Because I'm still single, my sister bought me a cat to help start my "inevitable collection." FML

by Anonymous / 05/07/2013 at 4:17pm / United States (Ohio) / Animals

Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML

by wtfmama / 05/04/2013 at 8:51am / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids

Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML

by halliemarie1818 / 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm / United States / Animals

Today, my virginal girlfriend of a year graduated from veterinary school. She can shove her arm shoulder-deep up a cow's ass without blinking, but still feels too insecure to even touch my penis. FML

by Gurior / 04/16/2013 at 1:44pm / Canada / Intimacy

Today, I found out that Yale had actually accepted me seventeen years ago. My mother apparently burned my acceptance package and letters because she didn't want me to upstage her UChicago degree. FML

by OPhere / 04/15/2013 at 3:37am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.