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MelanieP

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MelanieP

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 16 January 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 869
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About MelanieP : Fuck your life.

MelanieP's page activity

Visits<b>fxxth</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 11:09am<b>tard1s</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 5:52pm<b>shorty6823</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 6:45pm<b>chunkbutt</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 1:04am<b>levodkamartini</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 11:03am<b>Noah197099</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 9:59am<b>bosox7</b> - the 03/08/2014 at 7:36pm<b>jonathanedwards</b> - the 01/24/2014 at 4:49pm<b>idkellie</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 4:02pm<b>Moelyl</b> - the 01/09/2014 at 2:26pm<b>LazyBoy1710</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 12:07pm<b>MandyCat484</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 9:36pm<b>FairJ1025</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 8:04pm<b>justinkoch</b> - the 10/22/2013 at 7:12pm<b>wolfstalker213</b> - the 10/07/2013 at 8:39am<b>zomgbies</b> - the 07/10/2013 at 9:59am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:22pm<b>Tamara2011</b> - the 12/29/2009 at 11:58pm

MelanieP's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

MelanieP's favorite FMLs

Today, I pulled a hamstring by taking a dump. FML

#7139059
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26112) - you deserved it (6631)

On 01/04/2010 at 1:43am - health - by sadface (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I realized that our generation will be remembered as the kids who liked sparkly vampires. FML

#6439149
341 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70027) - you deserved it (11902)

On 11/24/2009 at 7:08pm - misc - by buhknee - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I got an email from the company that manages my cat's microchip informing me that I had to update my information that had been entered by the local Humane Society. Apparently, they listed my cat "Coral" as the owner, and me as the pet. To change it, they needed the cat's signature. FML

#5663418
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47585) - you deserved it (3863)

On 10/05/2009 at 3:23pm - animals - by APetsPet (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, the weird receptionist at the hotel I'm staying at asked me if I needed an extra blanket because I "looked cold in my sleep last night". FML

#5443972
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60533) - you deserved it (2462)

On 09/24/2009 at 5:50am - misc - by scaredtosleep (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was diagnosed with diabetes. I went to tell my grandpa, who immediately said, "I'm sorry, let's go get ice cream to cheer you up." FML

#5307828
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39872) - you deserved it (3391)

On 09/17/2009 at 3:05am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I ignored my cat's incessant meowing, and pushed him away every time he wanted to be petted. The next time I walked downstairs I found him dead. FML

#5210731
389 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25370) - you deserved it (86702)

On 09/12/2009 at 5:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I was sitting on my boyfriends lap and we were hanging out, talking, and enjoying each other's company. Then he looked into my eyes and right when I thought he was going to kiss me, he said "I can feel your heartbeat on my dick." FML

#5136668
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19966) - you deserved it (4138)

On 09/08/2009 at 9:26pm - intimacy - by awkwardbf (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I ran into my parents bedroom after I heard my name and what sounded like painful screams. When I opened the door my parents were on top of each other laughing hysterically. They needed me to find the key to the handcuffs. FML

#5109294
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54493) - you deserved it (2924)

On 09/07/2009 at 5:20pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to my five year old son picking off the scabs from his chicken pox and dropping them into my open mouth as I slept. FML

#4958000
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (85470) - you deserved it (5109)

On 08/31/2009 at 6:05pm - kids - by beya (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up to my five year old son picking off the scabs from his chicken pox and dropping them into my open mouth as I slept. FML

#4958000
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (85470) - you deserved it (5109)

On 08/31/2009 at 6:05pm - kids - by beya (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got a prank call. I now wish he'd call back so I can actually talk to someone. FML

#4895245
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42724) - you deserved it (7561)

On 08/28/2009 at 11:39pm - misc - by MelanieP (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that the crumbs on the couch that look like the oreos you just ate, can actually turn out to be very crunchy, and have legs. FML

#4738686
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9590) - you deserved it (40511)

On 08/22/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend updated her Facebook status when I was with her. No, let me correct myself. Today, my girlfriend updated her Facebook status when I was in her. FML

#4574797
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69222) - you deserved it (10353)

On 08/16/2009 at 2:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my sister and I were reading the new FML posts. I sat close to the fan, and after a few minutes, I leaned against it for support. It immediatly sucked up my hair and started violently twisting it. My sister continued to read and shouted at me because my cries for help are distracting. FML

#4550726
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45425) - you deserved it (12523)

On 08/15/2009 at 3:21pm - health - by baldintheback (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I found out my husband had bought my 1-year-old daughter a shirt that says "Birth Control Fail" in pink glittery letters. He even took her out in it while I was at work. FML

#4525246
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59592) - you deserved it (7138)

On 08/14/2009 at 12:57pm - kids - by ohgod (woman) - United States (Iowa)



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