MechaMew2

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MechaMew2

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 19972
  • Number of comments : 55
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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MechaMew2's page activity

Visits<b>s3ahawkz</b> - the 11/12/2015 at 3:06pm<b></b> - the 01/10/2011 at 11:02pm<b>hoshica</b> - the 06/04/2009 at 3:51pm<b>sammatthews2007</b> - the 05/03/2009 at 9:59am<b>nicadeo</b> - the 04/24/2009 at 3:54pm

MechaMew2's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

MechaMew2's favorite FMLs

Today, while at work I was reading "The Very Hungry Caterpillar" to me class of 5 year olds. I got near the end of the book and said "Look at the big fat caterpillar" to which one of my pupils replied "Just like you, Miss!" FML

by Lesley / 02/16/2009 at 8:11pm / United Kingdom (Glasgow City) / Kids

Today, my dad told me to take my stress out by getting a girlfriend. My mom laughed and said, "no that won't work, just go jack off in the shower again." FML

by IBleedArbor / 02/16/2009 at 5:59pm / United States (Connecticut) / Intimacy

Today, I was watching TV when the Jim Beam commercial came on with the hot girl saying how she likes her men fat and hairy. My mom walked in and said, "See honey, you still have a chance." FML

by LonelyInLA / 02/16/2009 at 4:45pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, at the gym, I see a person laying unconscious on the ground with people crowded around. Previously being a lifeguard, and knowing CPR, I ran over and asked a man what happened, preparing to check his vitals. I then realized that the body was a dummy and the employees were doing a drill. FML

by thedullard / 02/16/2009 at 12:35am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was a host during kids' event. I did my job and started to do some funny moves to entertain the kids. I was wearing a top with a really low cut. Then noticed that all the children were pointing at me happily and adults looked surprised. Then I noticed that both my boobs had popped out. FML

by Nastiaa / 02/15/2009 at 10:49am / Estonia (Harjumaa) / Kids

Today, I was trying on lingerie in the dressing room of Victoria’s Secret with my boyfriend next to me. I told my him in a seductive, playful tone “You can stay and watch if you give me a piece of your gum.” He said “No I only have three more” and left the room. FML

by cjk004 / 02/15/2009 at 6:35am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was instructed by my boss to welcome the 2 new foreign business partners since I am the only one who could speak their language. When they arrived I greeted them in their language. One of them scratched his head and asked his companion in plain and clear English, "What did he say?" FML

by Salaryman / 02/15/2009 at 1:21am / Philippines (Rizal) / Work

Today, my mother was driving me and my friends to a wedding. My friends and I were talking about birth control, and then my mother chimes in, "Yeah, I used to use the sponge, but the spermicide would always burn your dad's penis." FML

by Grossed out / 02/14/2009 at 4:37pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, I returned home from college for the first time in a month. I went to my bedroom and found a nice gift bag on my dresser. Thinking it was a Valentine's gift, I opened it. My dog's ashes were in a tin inside. This is how I found out my dog died since I was away. FML

by Anne / 02/14/2009 at 3:50pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals

Today, I was talking to my parents about feeling insecure with my "beach body" as Spring Break keeps getting closer and closer. My dad warned me by saying, "Don't wear a gray swimsuit. People will try to roll you back into the ocean". FML

by Shamu / 02/13/2009 at 7:15pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, on campus, these really overly-happy people walking around with big signs saying "free hugs". When I walked towards them, their smiles faded, and they put their signs down. FML

by shit's weak / 02/13/2009 at 4:51pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, it was my first day working at a milking parlor. As I crouched behind a cow to put on an udder cluster, I looked up and gasped just in time for the cow to crap on my face. FML

by abi_vet_student / 02/13/2009 at 7:42am / United Kingdom (Edinburgh) / Animals

Today, I was expelled from school. By my own mother. FML

by Kulcha / 02/13/2009 at 6:07am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was pestering a co-worker, so she jokingly stated "I'll bury you!" and I replied "I'll bury your mom!". Her moms funeral was last week. FML

by idkmybffjill? / 02/12/2009 at 11:12pm / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I was volunteering at a nursing home calling bingo numbers. One woman stood up and started making noises, so I assumed she had won and started clapping. She then fell on the floor and died of a heart attack. I essentially applauded her death. FML

by janedoe / 02/12/2009 at 5:21pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work