About Mauskau : My name is Zabrina, I'm 4"11, my hair is naturally brown but I went blonde for a year, and apparently the app rotates my picture even though it is the right way round on my phone. I use the app on both my gs3 and awful 3rd gen iPod touch. I tend to see things differently to other people, I see the good in the bad and the bad in the good. I live in England, near London. Seeing people moan at people for using British spellings irritates me, a lot. I love British English. I laugh when people say "I speak American." No, sweetie, it's English.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
Today, I was told that all the data on my laptop is unrecoverable after my hard drive crashed. I have been charged £300 for them to tell me this. Feeling sorry for myself, I wrapped myself up in a blanket and turned on my fan radiator as it's so cold... and promptly set my carpet on fire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20419) - you deserved it (2471)
On 10/26/2010 at 9:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)
Today, my girlfriend and my parents staged an intervention, and have asked me to go to rehab. What they want me to go to rehab for? World of Warcraft. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7729) - you deserved it (49244)
On 10/25/2010 at 11:06am - misc - by leve80paladin (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I asked my girlfriend's father if I could marry his daughter. He smiled, shook my hand, and said "No, now get out of my house." FML
I agree, your life sucks (33278) - you deserved it (3291)
On 10/07/2010 at 10:26am - love - by Vinny1017 - United States (New York)
Today, after bringing my dog back inside, he started whining. I thought it was because he wanted his toys, but he was really trying to say, "Help me," as a torpedo of diarrhea exploded out of him, leaving a trail down the hallway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20631) - you deserved it (3382)
On 10/06/2010 at 12:01pm - animals - by ukfan - United States
Today, I got hit by a flying log of Salami that someone threw out of their car window, and its metal wire cut my shoulder. I got scarred by a flying hunk of pig. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18514) - you deserved it (1728)
On 10/04/2010 at 7:31pm - misc - by ifpigsflew (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, I was watching tv with my grandpa, and he stops flipping channels on a movie with a hot naked chick getting oiled down. Suddenly the remote lands on my stomach as my mom and grandma walk in the door. They yelled at me for being a pervert for an hour, while my grandpa sat and chuckled. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29612) - you deserved it (3189)
On 09/24/2010 at 6:22am - misc - by Andrew - United States (Indiana)
Today, my cousin came to visit from America. While out shopping, she said loudly that she was having trouble finding clothes to fit around her huge fanny, causing a lot of people to stare in our direction. I had to explain to her that "fanny" in the UK means "vagina." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27631) - you deserved it (2871)
On 09/09/2010 at 10:00am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, my husband discovered that whispering anything in my ear will turn me on. He turned to me and whispered 'cheeseburger' in my ear. Unfortunately, I moaned. Now he now laughs about it with our roommate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20299) - you deserved it (13356)
On 08/07/2010 at 9:05pm - intimacy - by Indigo_Kitten (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, the airport security guard told me to lift my fat rolls so he could finish patting me down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18162) - you deserved it (32106)
On 07/17/2010 at 2:16am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my husband and I took a walk on the wharf. We walked by a Wax Museum and in front of the museum there was a bench with a very realistic wax man sitting on it. I got very close to his face and yelled over to my husband how realistic the wax man looked. Just then, he coughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4818) - you deserved it (21185)
On 02/13/2010 at 8:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my maid washed my PS3. Yes, with soap and water. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29821) - you deserved it (13441)
Today, I was at the theatre watching a movie. There was a lady and a kid behind me. I all of a sudden felt ice hit my head. I turned around and asked the kid to stop, then heard his mom say, "Hit that cow!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (20657) - you deserved it (1692)
On 02/07/2010 at 2:21am - misc - by HitbyIce (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, during a basketball game, I fell into metal chairs which then decided to fold in, causing me to fall to the floor in a very dramatic and painful fall. When I stood up, so did everyone else and they were all clapping, including the other team. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14808) - you deserved it (2172)
On 02/06/2010 at 1:25am - health - by aurorason - Sent from mobile version
Today, I discovered that if you slip on ice, imitating Mario from Super Mario Bros when he attempts to stop himself slipping, won't work in real life. I now have a broken nose, as well as a blood trail running from my driveway into my kitchen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5875) - you deserved it (22781)
On 01/25/2010 at 1:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I noticed that in my cover letter I wrote "I also have an eye.", instead of "I also have an eye for details.", and I have been sending it out for the past few weeks. No wonder I haven't gotten any replies. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6178) - you deserved it (19114)
On 11/14/2009 at 11:52am - work - by crazylobster (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)
Monday 20 May 2013
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