About Mauskau : My name is Zabrina, I'm 4"11, my hair is naturally brown but I went blonde for a year, and apparently the app rotates my picture even though it is the right way round on my phone. I use the app on both my gs3 and awful 3rd gen iPod touch. I tend to see things differently to other people, I see the good in the bad and the bad in the good. I live in England, near London. Seeing people moan at people for using British spellings irritates me, a lot. I love British English. I laugh when people say "I speak American." No, sweetie, it's English.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
Today, the sewers in my town became overloaded. My basement is now filled with other people's poo. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33750) - you deserved it (2052)
On 06/01/2011 at 4:40pm - misc - by L -
Today, I was so sick that I was puking and had the runs. While on the toilet, I yelled for my boyfriend to get me a bowl to puke in. As I did so, I saw that a ton of it was forming on the floor in dots. My boyfriend had given me a spaghetti strainer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34423) - you deserved it (2999)
On 05/02/2011 at 9:51am - health - by megomania (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I was awoken by my dad yelling into my ear. In shock, I jumped up off the couch, and came smashing down into the coffee table. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19826) - you deserved it (2898)
On 04/03/2011 at 1:41pm - misc - by Chris (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, while bending over to get the brownies I was making out of the oven, my husband slapped my butt. I fell into the oven. FML
I agree, your life sucks (62547) - you deserved it (4543)
On 04/03/2011 at 11:14am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my boyfriend pulled on my pubes and made 'engine starting' noises. This was his attempt at foreplay. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30554) - you deserved it (10849)
On 04/03/2011 at 7:27am - intimacy - by dahs - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)
Today, I was driving home at night, and got into an accident. Someone had left a toilet in the middle of the road. I hit it. The toilet's fine, but my car now has a toilet-shaped dent in the front. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26274) - you deserved it (4570)
On 03/22/2011 at 1:10pm - misc - by jballer - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my neighbors got a rooster. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50368) - you deserved it (4739)
On 03/22/2011 at 3:23am - animals - by negin -
TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30174) - you deserved it (24887)
On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)
Today, my husband bought a horse. We don't own any furniture, but we have a flippin' horse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43355) - you deserved it (5134)
On 03/15/2011 at 2:01am - money - by neverthefirst -
Today, I overheard a little girl ask her mom if the round lady in purple was pretending to be a giant eggplant. I was the lady in purple. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21743) - you deserved it (6980)
On 03/10/2011 at 5:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I realized how out of shape I am, when I couldn't finish masturbating because I ran out of breath. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12328) - you deserved it (46761)
On 02/13/2011 at 4:01am - intimacy - by RyanM - Canada (Alberta)
Today, the horn in my car decided to malfunction. It honked continuously for an hour as I drove down the highway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19626) - you deserved it (1833)
On 12/23/2010 at 9:21pm - misc - by nick (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I was getting ready for the school swimming carnival and was running very late. I reached for my deodorant and sprayed it on. It was only when I was at the pool that I realized I had accidentally grabbed the spray tan and covered my underarms in it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7114) - you deserved it (16287)
On 11/16/2010 at 5:07am - misc - by huulo -
Today, I was sitting at a traffic light when a cute girl appeared at the side of the road. I sat and watched her until she had crossed, when I realised that I had missed the light. A large queue of cars had built up behind me, yet none of them used their horn because I was driving my police car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5551) - you deserved it (34614)
On 11/10/2010 at 10:29am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (York)
Today, I need to find a way to explain to my 5, 7 and 12 year old kids their uncle wants to become their aunt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43029) - you deserved it (7309)
On 11/09/2010 at 12:32am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Friday 24 May 2013
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