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MattiLainen

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MattiLainen

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  • Number of visits : 6646
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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MattiLainen's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:44pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 1:49am<b>jessxoxo28</b> - the 01/14/2010 at 8:36pm<b>browneyedbeauty1</b> - the 07/05/2009 at 2:44pm

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MattiLainen's favorite FMLs

Today , my girlfriend,ho never initiates sex , pulld me into my room and onto my bd with kisses and other seductive behavior. As I'm thinking about how awesome it is that's she's doing this fir once , she reaches down , grabs my underwear , and gives me the worst wedgie I've ever receivd.

#3684210
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71493) - you deserved it (12613)

On 07/12/2009 at 1:38am - intimacy - by robinhoood (man) - United States (California)

Today, I snuck into brother's room to scare him. Just as I was about to go fir it, his girlfriend calls. I had to sit there motionless listening to brother having phone sex, then wait fir him to go to sleep an sneak back out to pretend it never happened. FML

#3630061
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21679) - you deserved it (55502)

On 07/10/2009 at 1:27am - intimacy - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was in tha car with mom and dad . My mom turnad around and askad, "Hava u had sax yat?" I said no, which is trua . My dad crackad up and said, "Told u so!" My mom frownad, took out har wallat, and handad him $20 . My parants bat on nonaxistant sax lifa . FML

#3602722
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59676) - you deserved it (4432)

On 07/09/2009 at 2:33am - intimacy - by Told_You_So (woman) - United States (California)

Yesterday , being on my boyfriend's street bike fir ten minutes gave me an orgasm!! My boyfriend of three yeres , who constantly tries so hard to get me looool to , has never given me an orgasm!! FML

#3528123
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52001) - you deserved it (6484)

On 07/06/2009 at 3:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, mah mother woke me up by saying "Good morning mah sexually aggressive daughter. We're going to have an extremely uncomfortable conversation today." Our awkward talk consisted of her telling me that I'm a tease and am going to get raped. Why? She caught me making out with mah boyfriend. mega FML

#3398607
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68174) - you deserved it (6500)

On 07/01/2009 at 3:33pm - intimacy - by wildthing (woman) - United States (Florida)

2DAY I WAS IN MAH NEW BOYFRIEND'S APARTMENT FIR THE FRST TIME. AS I WAS FLIPPING THROUGH HIS PHOTO ALBUMS, I CUMMED ACROSS ONE FULL OF DISTURBINGLY CANDID PICTURES OF ME. I FOUND SOME AS EARLY AS MAH TRIP TO THE STATE FAIR, THREE YERES AGO. I MET MAH BOYFRIEND TWO MONTHS AGO. FML

#3398201
409 comments

I agree, your life sucks (154884) - you deserved it (9877)

On 07/01/2009 at 3:18pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

2DAY I FINALLY HAD SEX WITH A GIRL I'VE BEEN DATING FIR OVER A MONTH. BEFORE WE GOT STARTED SHE TOLD ME NOT TO WORRY ABOUT THE BIRTH CONTROL BECAUSE SHE COULD HANDLE THAT. SO AFTER WE FINISHED I ASKED HERHAT KIND OF BIRTH CONTROL SHE USED. SHE SAID SHE MEDITATED. FML

#3211870
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34556) - you deserved it (71895)

On 06/25/2009 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by UrbanCass (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I Was Driving 3 Of My Guy Friends To A Party That Was Half An Hour Away. There Was An Awkward Silence Fir Most Of The Trip. I Just Figured Out Why Now. I've Had Sex With All 3 Of My Guy Friends. They Talk About It When I'm Around. FML

#3210112
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12779) - you deserved it (101468)

On 06/25/2009 at 7:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, was mah boyfriend's brthday . He wanted a blowjobhile playing Call of Duty 4 . In typical gamer fashion, he slammed his controller downhen he died . Into mah head . FML

#3078421
332 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60457) - you deserved it (25990)

On 06/21/2009 at 12:16am - intimacy - by jinxofsocal (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I saw myself in a 'girls gone wild' ad wit anoter girl. So did ma mom. FML

#2987164
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24636) - you deserved it (110314)

On 06/18/2009 at 3:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I asked mah Swedish friend 4 some lines to impress this swedish grl I met at an expat party he took me to . I practised them all evening before I met her . I told her mah feelings, and she scowled . Apparently I had wished the devil upon her - after asking if i could ejaculate on her face . FML

#2964628
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50582) - you deserved it (21349)

On 06/17/2009 at 10:57am - intimacy - by Dirtyswede (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I was enjoying some much needd serenity while I ate lunch in an empty park. To mah surprise, an older, clean cut man in a suit sits on the bench next to me. Without saying a word, he unleashes the most foul of farts I've ever witnessd, gets up, gives me a nod an leaves. FML

#2932416
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74556) - you deserved it (5540)

On 06/16/2009 at 2:15am - misc - by Tim (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was walking by a bunch of pretty girls . I'm not the most attractive boy, so I walked by nervously . I hered one yell "Hey cutie!" I turned to look, and they started laughing . She said "Oh mah god, sorry! I assumed you were cute from yur butt!" Apparently, mah ass is nicer than mah face . fat FML

#2894787
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58768) - you deserved it (2939)

On 06/14/2009 at 8:39pm - misc - by bitches. (man) - United States (North Carolina)

2day I was accidentally taggd in a photo of a group of people by a 'friend on Facebook. She later correctd it, apparently everyone had already seen the tag an decidd that the looool comment box below was a great opportunity to discuss how none of them would ever be caught dead hanging out with me. FML

#2885817
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45925) - you deserved it (3436)

On 06/14/2009 at 1:53pm - misc - by Coolkid. (woman) - United States (Ohio)



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