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MattiLainen

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MattiLainen

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  • Number of visits : 5667
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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MattiLainen's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:44pm<b>jessxoxo28</b> - the 01/14/2010 at 8:36pm<b>browneyedbeauty1</b> - the 07/05/2009 at 2:44pm

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MattiLainen's favorite FMLs

Today, before class I was trying to prove I can twist myself like the people on the front of my anatomy textbook, I got onto a table and twisted my ankles behind my head. Everyone seemed impressed until I farted so loudly that it echoed in the hallway. I couldn't get my legs unstuck. FML

#5050946
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15322) - you deserved it (45239)

On 09/04/2009 at 11:07pm - misc - by flexibleflatulance (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was sleeping in my apartment when I woke up to the smell of smoke. Alarmed, I ran out to the kitchen to find my roommates trying to put out a fire on the stove. As soon as they saw me, they ran for it, informing me that it was my problem now. They used my good frying pan. FML

#4897987
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38272) - you deserved it (2757)

On 08/29/2009 at 1:38am - misc - by chinesef000d (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I left for college. I spent hundreds of dollars on clothes, bedding and other things. After packing my entire closet and everything else I needed, I left only to have to head back home. My dad forgot to pay the first semesters tuition. He said "Oh well, you would have failed out anyway." FML

#4891405
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50368) - you deserved it (3331)

On 08/28/2009 at 8:59pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, as I arrived at my house after a two week holiday, I opened the door and heard footsteps upstairs, I went up and found my boyfriend naked in bed. We had great sex and afterwards I found my best friend naked in the wardrobe. Turns out they'd had great sex also. FML

#4879215
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60335) - you deserved it (4544)

On 08/28/2009 at 7:43am - intimacy - by Phoellie (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, for the first time, I hugged the man I have been in love with for four years. It was a congratulatory hug at his wedding to my best friend. FML

#4874112
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55430) - you deserved it (13010)

On 08/28/2009 at 12:23am - love - by itrustedsnapeallalong (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my mother told me I should think about quitting school. She explained that the reason was because she didn't want me to be more successful than my older sisters. FML

#4862674
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53904) - you deserved it (2154)

On 08/27/2009 at 4:28pm - misc - by Kitty_Gem (woman) - United States

Today, for my birthday, my mom presented me with a $4,000 check to pay for my braces. I've been very self-conscious about my teeth for years. Everyone applauded and told me how happy they were for me. Later, my mom asked me for the check back. Apparently it was just meant to make her look good. FML

#4859599
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64779) - you deserved it (2357)

On 08/27/2009 at 1:23pm - money - by crookedteeth (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I found out why my parents have been trying to convince me not to go to college this year. I also found out where the $20,000 they just spent on landscaping came from. My college fund. Which is now $0. FML

#4855501
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54801) - you deserved it (2566)

On 08/27/2009 at 5:16am - money - by noeducation (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I discovered that my parents rooted through our house looking for junk to sell at a garage sale. They sold all of my books from my bookshelf. When I freaked, out my mom said 'well you never read them'. There was about $300 hidden between the pages of those books. They made $60. FML

#4854155
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44741) - you deserved it (8684)

On 08/27/2009 at 2:58am - misc - by gonebabygone - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went to get food, I was late so my friend ordered for me. I took a few bites and it was getting hard to breathe. I realized it's a bluebery muffin, I'm deathly allergic. I look to my friend, she was laughing saying she wanted to see if it was true. I just got out of the hospital. FML

#4850568
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65432) - you deserved it (5281)

On 08/27/2009 at 12:07am - health - by Hellohaileyexoh (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my husband and I decided to take a romantic trip to the beach. We got pulled over, and shortly thereafter he was arrested. Just so happens you can't miss child support payments for your twelve year old daughter without getting a warrant. He has a daughter? We've been married for 14 years. FML

#4845223
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63102) - you deserved it (3185)

On 08/26/2009 at 8:57pm - misc - by AreYouSerious (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was at the park with my autistic son when I noticed a teenage girl imitating him by flapping her hands and walking on her toes. Fed up with children mocking my son, I went over and sternly lectured the girl's mother. Turns out, her daughter is autistic too and will be in my son's class. FML

#4810321
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39877) - you deserved it (20696)

On 08/25/2009 at 1:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mother was cleaning out my underwear drawer and found my vibrator. Everytime I see her in the hall, she just cracks up and makes jokes about how I can't get a guy, so I have to rely on electronics. What's worse, she told my dad AND posted a status on facebook about it. FML

#4809359
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65387) - you deserved it (9538)

On 08/25/2009 at 12:04pm - love - by Sarah (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I got my first tattoo. It's a large broadsword which runs the length of my spine. I went home to show it off and learned that the hilt on my neck looks just like a penis when the rest of it is covered with my shirt. FML

#4803927
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14066) - you deserved it (58151)

On 08/25/2009 at 2:44am - misc - by damnit (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was outside with a guy I really like. He asked me to lay down on the ground and watch the stars with him. I did. Suddenly, he got up, walked over to another girl and kissed her. They left me there on the soaking wet ground, watching the stars. FML

#4756705
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39328) - you deserved it (3377)

On 08/23/2009 at 7:00am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Buskerud)



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