Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MattCole

Search for a member

MattCole

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2102
  • Number of comments : 44
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

MattCole's page activity

Visits<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 12/18/2013 at 4:33am<b>marnyroad</b> - the 05/05/2010 at 7:39pm<b>shiritt</b> - the 03/11/2010 at 7:28am

MattCole's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

MattCole's favorite FMLs

Today, my daughter told me she wanted to be a stripper when she grew up, just like daddy's girlfriend. We're still married. FML

#8300891
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38080) - you deserved it (3358)

On 02/15/2010 at 1:58pm - love - by ShayisPay101 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that my best friend pays my boyfriend to this day to take me out. FML

#8299484
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32805) - you deserved it (2708)

On 02/15/2010 at 1:08pm - love - by thirdwheel (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I decided to have sex with with my boyfriend. After we had finished I jokingly said, "who's going to sleep in the wet patch?". He got up and said "you're optimistic, I'm not staying. Oh, and I'm dumping you, that performance was disappointing". It was my first time. FML

#8292337
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30195) - you deserved it (3801)

On 02/15/2010 at 8:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my wife came home drunk, telling me all about this amazing man she met at the club with her friends, and how she wanted to have sex with him but couldn't because she was on her period. What a present. FML

#8266626
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25296) - you deserved it (2072)

On 02/14/2010 at 8:49pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, while losing my virginity to my boyfriend, I had my first orgasm. I don't remember much of what I said during, but after it was all over, he looks at me and says, "You have terrible grammar during climax." FML

#8265301
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19305) - you deserved it (4861)

On 02/14/2010 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by klsdhjla (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, in my psychology class, we were given a sheet that had a list of stressful events and we were to select the ones we had experienced in the last 12 months. I got highest in my class of above an 80% chance of getting a life threatening illness due to stress. Everyone laughed. FML

#8160504
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22647) - you deserved it (2681)

On 02/12/2010 at 6:39am - health - by Stressy (man) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, I noticed that my neighbor's house has a clear view of my daughter's bathroom. There is a telescope in his window. FML

#8021510
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35773) - you deserved it (2547)

On 02/08/2010 at 7:28pm - misc - by disasterbutton (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was in the car with my 16 year old daughter. There was a guy on a fast looking motorcycle next to me at the stop light. I yelled to him to "get it up!" so that he would do a wheelie. Just before the light turned green he yelled back, "You're too old for me, but I'll get it up for her!" FML

#7897076
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7749) - you deserved it (26157)

On 02/05/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I asked my girlfriend why she can't treat me like the way I treat her. She said, "because you love me more than I love you." FML

#7895812
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33099) - you deserved it (3964)

On 02/05/2010 at 12:35am - love - by boostedsaab - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got sent to detention for saying, "that's what she said" after a girl in my class said, "push a little harder" while disecting a frog. FML

#7894652
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28658) - you deserved it (23653)

On 02/05/2010 at 12:01am - misc - by eemp - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got rear-ended. In possibly the scariest part of downtown. At night. By a man who spoke hardly any English but managed to ask if I would go out dancing with him instead of calling my insurance company. FML

#7868479
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27310) - you deserved it (2114)

On 02/04/2010 at 1:34am - misc - by city_girl (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was developing film at walmart. It started to get a little warm, so I began taking off my sweatshirt. This creepy old man approaches me, saying "You know, usually girls like you are paid to take their clothes off." FML

#7837856
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28766) - you deserved it (3849)

On 02/03/2010 at 1:24am - misc - by hotandbothered (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while at a party, Journey's "Don't Stop Believin'" started playing. For being the only one who didn't know the lyrics, I had beer thrown on me, my shirt stolen, and I was locked outside for half an hour. It's below freezing. FML

#7742822
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18781) - you deserved it (32947)

On 01/31/2010 at 12:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, while at a party, Journey's "Don't Stop Believin'" started playing. For being the only one who didn't know the lyrics, I had beer thrown on me, my shirt stolen, and I was locked outside for half an hour. It's below freezing. FML

#7742822
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18781) - you deserved it (32947)

On 01/31/2010 at 12:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I told my best friend I was breaking up with my girlfriend of 3 years. He thought it would be funny to tell her I was going to propose to her that night. She showed up telling me how much she loves me and that when we get married how great it will be. FML

#7682413
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31732) - you deserved it (6339)

On 01/29/2010 at 7:08pm - misc - by anonymous - Sent from mobile version



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: