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MandaMalice

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MandaMalice

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 28 October 1979 (34 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1405
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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MandaMalice's page activity

Visits<b>why_teh_hell</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 1:41pm<b>Demonking</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 7:31am

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MandaMalice's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried convincing my Valentine-hating boyfriend to send me a card, by explaining how important it is to me. He finally agreed and sent me a card. I opened it up, and it wished me 'harmony and well-being on Lupercalia'. What is Lupercalia? It's an ancient Roman festival where men run down the street naked, whipping people with goat skins to encourage fertility. FML

#8250331
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8499) - you deserved it (32842)

On 02/14/2010 at 1:56pm - love - by CrappyValentine (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, my dog farted next to my CPAP sleep/breathing machine. The machine sucked up her fart, compressed it, and promptly injected it up both of my nostrils. FML

#8202300
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37319) - you deserved it (3314)

On 02/13/2010 at 11:08am - animals - by Dog fart - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, saying I was immature for making gay jokes all the time. A few hours later, I got six texts and three calls from guys I didn't know. It turns out, she put my name and number on Craigslist as a gay man seeking a relationship. FML

#8013875
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10933) - you deserved it (48078)

On 02/08/2010 at 3:21pm - love - by christian9294 - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that the man I met online was a fake Facebook account, made by my daughter and her friends. FML

#7997693
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30793) - you deserved it (6768)

On 02/08/2010 at 12:21am - love - by cupcakemonsteryu - Sent from mobile version

Today, I woke up and had a voicemail from my boyfriend. I just thought nothing of it because it was a pocket dial. I decided to listen to it carefully and realized it was him having sex with another girl. FML

#7904015
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23348) - you deserved it (1974)

On 02/05/2010 at 11:29am - intimacy - by donkeyd - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went out for a smoke before dinner. I glanced through the window only to see my husband take my cooking scissors, cut his toe nails and then put them back in the utensils canister without washing them. FML

#7902895
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26132) - you deserved it (5612)

On 02/05/2010 at 10:14am - misc - by fububc - Sent from mobile version

Today, my mother gave my daughter a behavior chart. I noticed that "drinking beer" was at the top of one of the columns. It's a chart for my daughter to use on me so my mother can judge my parenting skills. I am currently losing a sticker right now for being on the computer. FML

#7775302
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28992) - you deserved it (4390)

On 02/01/2010 at 8:17am - kids - by argh (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was in an elevator, and the hot girl who lives in my building and who I have a crush on got in. She was in a wheelchair with a broken leg, I panicked and tried to flirt with her, and I said 'Nice chair.' She replied 'Nice bruise' and punched me in the nuts. FML

#7766878
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11569) - you deserved it (45687)

On 02/01/2010 at 12:15am - love - by Liam. - Sent from mobile version

Today, I discovered that my best friend of 3 years has me in her phone as "Stupid Bitch". FML

#7718053
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26772) - you deserved it (3818)

On 01/30/2010 at 7:32pm - misc - by hahahawoww (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was caught going on Facebook at work. I was called into my boss' office to be reprimanded, and while he was lecturing me on the importance of staying focussed and the misuse of company property, his computer beeped. It was his Facebook chat notifying him of a new message. FML

#7671025
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30633) - you deserved it (4343)

On 01/29/2010 at 10:33am - work - by boredatwork (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mom asked me if I would be embarrassed if she got a tramp stamp. FML

#7651599
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26523) - you deserved it (2224)

On 01/28/2010 at 8:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was working at IHOP serving a table full of drunk idiots. After an hour of taking care of them I went to clean up their mess to find the tip they had left me. On a napkin a girl had wrote "Here's your tip for the night: Don't play leap frog with unicorns." FML

Today, my dad found out I got a tattoo behind his back and is really really upset. When I got home from work my car wasn't in the driveway. When I asked my dad where it was, he replied "you'll get it back when your tattoo comes off." FML

#7638250
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12197) - you deserved it (34423)

On 01/28/2010 at 8:08am - misc - by tattooooooface - United States

Today, I found out my bank account was in the negative because my work gave me a check that didn't clear. I went to my bank to get a statement of charges so my job could reimburse me. They told me requesting a statement costs 8 dollars, which I don't have because my account is in the negative. FML

#7591885
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24454) - you deserved it (2220)

On 01/26/2010 at 4:33pm - money - by tinaburrito - Sent from mobile version



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