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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 7 June 1992 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 24388
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Maltastic : A college course taking Jr. at a small school who spends most of her free time reading or working on the newspaper, lacking a social life of any kind, who'll do anything she can to make it into the world of Design and Magazines. (To be updated)

Maltastic's page activity

Visits<b>BranTheCasualMan</b> - the 03/22/2016 at 2:01pm<b>dmcintosh</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 7:49pm<b>ahmadmuneer</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 2:26pm<b>Kvothee</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 4:23pm<b>newyorkerkyle</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 10:52pm<b>swmmrrnr</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 1:28pm<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 7:48pm<b>l0seyours3lf</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 4:58pm<b>Corvo_Attano</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 5:25pm<b>spiers1</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 2:46pm<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 8:37pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 3:05pm<b>andyhitts25</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 11:25pm<b>bryan1271999</b> - the 11/05/2013 at 2:08am<b>thealex420</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 2:38am<b>Katchafire93</b> - the 02/25/2013 at 12:17am<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 12:50am<b>sillyfox</b> - the 11/28/2009 at 12:42am

Maltastic's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Maltastic's favorite FMLs

Today, one of my co-workers invited me to a cookout at her house with some other people from my new job. She said to wear my suit. Assuming she had a pool, I showed up in a bikini, only to find everyone else wearing business attire and staring at me like I had lost my mind. FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2009 at 10:36pm / United States (North Carolina) / Work

Today, I was playing Xbox live with my boyfriend. I was bored so I decided to mess around. So I put down my remote and unbuttoned his pants. Two minutes in he said, "Hurry up, we're getting killed without you. Besides you're way better at video games." FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2009 at 3:18am / Canada (British Columbia) / Geek

Today, I was masturbating into a sock when I felt something on my cock. I quickly ripped the sock off and threw it on the floor... and watched a huge spider come scurrying out. I just inadvertently fucked a spider. FML

by SpiderMan / 03/11/2009 at 8:23pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, I was pushing my 4 year old on the swing. I did what we call our "under doggie push": I throw her up in the air while I run underneath her before she hits me coming back down. I walked away to get my water and she yelled across the park "Can we do it doggie-style again?" FML

by Dang-ItsDanielle / 03/07/2009 at 1:28pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I put my picture into a celebrity look alike website. The three matches that came up were Barbra Streisand, Hillary Clinton, and Boy George. I'm 16. I'm a boy. FML

by oconron / 03/06/2009 at 1:09am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous