About Maddy_Moore : Hey, I'm Maddy. I'm not all that interesting honestly. Feel free to message me if you want though.
Maddy_Moore's FML badges
Back from a party
An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.
You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
Maddy_Moore's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 06/04/2015 at 9:07pm / United States (Indiana) / Work
Today, I overheard my wife telling my mother-in-law I was diagnosed with a learning disability earlier this week. She replied, "I always knew he was a retard. Why did you ever marry that idiot?" All my wife did was mutter "I don't know." FML
by Anonymous / 06/04/2015 at 5:08am / Maldives (Maale) / Miscellaneous
Today, I gave my girlfriend a hickey barely an inch from her vagina. She texted me later, saying her dad saw it and had grounded her. So yeah, I'm not sure I even want to know what the hell goes on in their house. FML
by W T F / 06/03/2015 at 3:22am / United States (Alabama) / Intimacy
by she has dumbcuntitis / 06/03/2015 at 2:03am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/03/2015 at 1:01am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I sneezed and ended up in the emergency room. How? Apparently the sneeze dislodged a kidney stone that is now slowly, painfully working its way from my kidney to my bladder so that I can piss it out. FML
by work_while_bent / 06/02/2015 at 1:21pm / United States (California) / Health
Today, one of my tires blew out on the highway. I managed to slow down and pull over without dying, and went to get my spare tire. I found it right where it was supposed to be, knifed to hell and with a taunting note from my psycho ex taped to it. We broke up nearly 3 years ago. FML
by Milo / 06/02/2015 at 12:50pm / Mexico (Distrito Federal) / Miscellaneous
by sorrystupid / 06/02/2015 at 3:42am / United States / Money
Today, I received a beautiful, heart-felt text from my boyfriend detailing all the ways he loved me. He probably should have emphasized just how big his heart is though because he sent the text to three other women too. Thank you, group messaging. FML
by TooLoud / 05/30/2015 at 8:12pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 05/30/2015 at 3:28am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, my girlfriend randomly confessed to basically having a "phobia" of monogamy. But don't worry, she defensively assured me she's never ever cheated on me, even though I never said she had, so I guess that's okay then. FML
by well then / 05/30/2015 at 1:40am / United States (Georgia) / Love
Today, my crackhead neighbour got slightly annoyed at my 2-day-old daughter's late-night wailing. Well, I think so, anyway, as she politely requested us to "SHUT THAT CUNT KID UP." or she would "BLOW BOTH OUR HOUSES UP, YOU FUCKING ASSFUCKS." But I'm not 100% sure. FML
by Anonymous / 05/29/2015 at 11:51pm / Australia / Kids
by Anonymous / 05/29/2015 at 10:23am / United States (Florida) / Health
Today, for my birthday, my boyfriend made me a coupon book. I thought it was sweet until I noticed they were all conditional. For example; "Give your boyfriend a blowjob and he'll give you a 10 minute back massage!". They're all like that and he's mad because I refuse to use them. FML
by shmoooopie / 05/28/2015 at 11:39pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy
- Today, I called my mom for her birthday. She started talking about an infomercial she'd seen for a… Today, I was at my friend's dorm eating supper. He and all his roommates are Chinese, and since I'm… Today, my roommates decided to hold an intervention. They told me I would have to break up with my…