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MWhinery95

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MWhinery95
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6416
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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MWhinery95's favorite FMLs

Today, I was feeling sick and fainted while teaching my kindergarten class. I came to when one boy poured a cup of water on my face. Three kids were crying into my walkie talkie telling the office I was dead, and the rest of the class had disappeared. FML

#20556205
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38495) - you deserved it (2838)

On 03/23/2013 at 9:25am - kids - by kindergarten teacher - United States (California)

Today, while making love to my boyfriend for the first time, I moaned his name. He freaked out over how I wasn't over my ex, and angrily left. They have the same name. FML

#20555878
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50890) - you deserved it (7588)

On 03/23/2013 at 12:43am - intimacy - by nraecher (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my psycho abstinence-only sex ed teacher claimed condoms give 50% protection at most against pregnancy. I couldn't help but correct her. She apologized for her "mistake", saying, "It's just that we're not ALL sluts, Kara." Now everyone thinks I'm a raging whore. FML

#20555528
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35489) - you deserved it (5266)

On 03/22/2013 at 8:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was feeling a bit insecure about my body, and I told my boyfriend I don't know how he can even stand to have sex with me. He replied, "I know, right?" FML

#20555435
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34458) - you deserved it (16819)

On 03/22/2013 at 7:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while shaving my nether regions, I slipped and sliced myself in three separate places. They won't completely stop bleeding. I'm virtually having a second period, and it hurts to close my legs. FML

#20555131
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28660) - you deserved it (6396)

On 03/22/2013 at 3:15pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Italy (Calabria)

Today, I finally got to meet my boyfriend's parents; it turns out that his mum is my therapist. I've just spent an entire morning telling her how confused I am about my sexuality. FML

#20553373
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43959) - you deserved it (5744)

On 03/21/2013 at 6:25am - misc - by me (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I returned from a 5-day cruise for my senior spring break, filled with gorgeous sorority girls from all over the country. I was seasick the whole time. FML

#20553243
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26719) - you deserved it (4431)

On 03/21/2013 at 1:59am - misc - by captainlame (man) - United States

Today, I walked into an exam after having stayed up 20 straight hours studying. The professor looked at me and muttered, "Don't bother, I'm failing you either way." FML

#20552400
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36392) - you deserved it (3526)

On 03/20/2013 at 4:26pm - misc - by Tired (man) - United States

Today, we had to re-live sex ed in my college biology class. Unlike in middle school, nobody giggled incessantly. However, the guy sitting next to me stared at me intensely for nearly the whole three hour lecture. FML

#20552364
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28781) - you deserved it (2673)

On 03/20/2013 at 3:45pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went out to Applebees with a girl I like and a group of friends. Someone asked if the girl and I were dating. She instantly replied with a bit of disgust "What? No way, never!" It would have been nice to know before paying for the last ten or so dates we went on. FML

Today, I realized that the smell of chlorine has started to turn me on, probably because my girlfriend has an indoor pool in her house. Guess who works as a swim instructor. FML

#20552149
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38962) - you deserved it (5498)

On 03/20/2013 at 12:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, for the sixth time in a row, I was driving my kid to school and he made me late for work. Why? He was whacking off instead of getting ready. FML

#20551973
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39790) - you deserved it (5612)

On 03/20/2013 at 7:07am - intimacy - by Why son, why? (man) - United States

Today, we started our 17 hour drive to Michigan for spring break. My mom decided to go to Target to buy some music CDs. All she bought was three Nicki Minaj CDs. She has already replayed the first CD four times. 14 hours to go. FML

#20551039
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34149) - you deserved it (2712)

On 03/19/2013 at 4:12pm - misc - by :( - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I found out that my gorgeous, smart, perfect new boyfriend has an unusual fetish. It doesn't involve me at all actually. Just a Labrador. This is probably a deal breaker. FML

#20550555
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38238) - you deserved it (3863)

On 03/19/2013 at 7:30am - intimacy - by soontobesingle (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while working in childcare, we went to a farm so the kids could see how things worked. They started showing off prize winning cattle and when they bought out "Miss Stacey", the kids lost their shit. My name is Miss Stacey. FML

#20550321
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30404) - you deserved it (2657)

On 03/19/2013 at 1:00am - work - by seriously! - Australia (New South Wales)



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