Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MWhinery95

Offline (the 02/02/2014 at 3:51am) | Search for a member

MWhinery95

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 11133
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

MWhinery95's page activity

Visits<b>NaN101</b> - the 04/14/2013 at 5:24am<b>MrEd</b> - the 12/14/2012 at 4:46am<b>bryan788</b> - the 11/19/2012 at 7:41pm<b>ladydragonstars</b> - the 10/27/2012 at 1:12pm<b>FMyLifeGod040</b> - the 08/21/2012 at 3:30pm<b>RussianFox</b> - the 07/12/2012 at 1:23pm<b>DocBastard</b> - the 07/12/2012 at 1:01pm<b>itsa_maddy</b> - the 07/12/2012 at 12:52am<b>ydi_4_suking</b> - the 07/11/2012 at 4:26am<b>arennie13</b> - the 07/11/2012 at 12:25am<b>l_teil</b> - the 07/10/2012 at 10:57am<b>uberdubers</b> - the 07/10/2012 at 8:12am<b>Abruun</b> - the 07/10/2012 at 5:46am<b>Iz_Dolan</b> - the 07/09/2012 at 10:50pm<b>erin37</b> - the 07/09/2012 at 10:22pm<b>jwbfml</b> - the 07/09/2012 at 8:15pm<b>kvdfan</b> - the 07/09/2012 at 6:31pm<b>MrBrightside21</b> - the 07/09/2012 at 11:53am

MWhinery95's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of MWhinery95's badges

MWhinery95's favorite FMLs

Today, as I walkd out of the looool local store, I noticd a young girl was sitting on the curb, crying. I nudgd her with the Snickers bar I had bought earlier, thinking she needd it more than me. After looking at it, she yelld, "PEDOPHILE!", punchd me in the balls, and then ran away screaming. FML

#20584129
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44573) - you deserved it (11474)

On 04/10/2013 at 8:45pm - kids - by Me - United States (California)

Today.. . my social teacher thought it would be a great idea to have a casual debate about Margaret Thatcher an her legacy . Within 10 minutes.. . the entire class was yelling.. . screaming.. . throwing stuff at each other . I got hit in the face with a binder . FML

#20584117
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37529) - you deserved it (3526)

On 04/10/2013 at 8:40pm - misc - by great idea - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, and I told him I was close to having an orgasm!! He smirkd and startd talking like Yoda, saying, ( Strong with the cum, this one is )!! Orgasm gone!!

#20583515
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51393) - you deserved it (8254)

On 04/10/2013 at 12:32pm - intimacy - by iwassoclose - United States

TODAY I WAS RIDING A NEW HORSE WHEN A LAWNMOWER STARTING UP SPOOKD HER. SHE JUMPD STRAIGHT UP IN THE AIR AND I LANDD DIRECTLY ON THE SADDLE HORN. I CAN'T WALK OR FEEL ANYTHING BETWEEN MY LEGS. FML

#20583228
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37965) - you deserved it (3792)

On 04/10/2013 at 5:06am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, mah doctor askd me how often I drink, and I respondd, ( Socially . ) My three-year-old pipd up, ( No Mom, u drink all the time . ) My doctor now think I'm a raging alcoholic . My looool kid has never seen me drink . FML

Today..!! it's my 17t birtday..!! and te first birtday since my moter died..!! leaving me to live wit my previously-absent fater!! He gave me pretzels and a laser pointer..!! and said..!! ( Happy birtday..!! fuckstick )!! One more year!! FML

#20581667
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63885) - you deserved it (3056)

On 04/09/2013 at 12:59am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today , I had to get my grandparents out of jail , cuz they were caught having sex in a public place!! They excused their actions by saying that u can only be young and stupid once , so if u continue doing stupid actions , u r still young!! FML

Today , ma 16-year-old son convincd ma 14-year-old daugter tat se wasn't allowd to use te ladies batroom at te sopping centre , because se wasn't wereing a dress like te grl on te sign . He told er grls in pants always usd te oter one . Se believd im . Tis is ma legacy . fat FML

#20580049
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42968) - you deserved it (6416)

On 04/08/2013 at 12:26am - kids - by badparent (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today... I was at Universityhen a giant mascot started walking in mah direction. As they walked past... theyhispered mah name seductively. I still don't knowho it was. FML

#20578916
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36255) - you deserved it (4904)

On 04/07/2013 at 10:51am - work - by confused - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I Was Discussing Possible Career Choices With Mah Relatives. Pretty Much Everyone Expressed The Belief That I'm Screwed For Life, With Mah Grandma Commenting Later: ( She Ain't Even Got The Tits For Porn. God Help Her. ) FML

#20577745
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42891) - you deserved it (3967)

On 04/06/2013 at 3:41pm - work - by flea-bitten (woman) - United States

Today,hile going down on grlfriend , I finally managed to give her an orgasm. During that orgasm , she tore out a clump of hair , causing me to scream in pain. She scowled and said , "Ah shut it , ya little bitch." FML

#20577693
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54015) - you deserved it (12376)

On 04/06/2013 at 3:13pm - intimacy - by dating walter white's gf apparently (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I went to work at a otel!! One of te guests decidd to play te piano in te lobby!! He's deaf!! Unfortunately, I'm not!! FML

#20575584
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29793) - you deserved it (6284)

On 04/05/2013 at 12:20am - work - by torturedears (woman) - United States (California)

Today, mah sister gave mah laptop away and dumpd a pile of her hamster's turds on mah bd . All of this because I flushd the toilet while she was in the shower last night . FML

#20573279
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39599) - you deserved it (6091)

On 04/03/2013 at 2:45pm - misc - by poop (man) -

Today, ma cousin is visiting from Oklaoma. He can't go a minute witout saying ( looool YOLO ) or ( Swag ). He's going to be ere fir a week. FML

#20572695
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43194) - you deserved it (3610)

On 04/03/2013 at 1:20am - misc - by fuck YOLO - United States (California)

Taday my older brother walkd in on mehile I was wearing nothing but a bra, panties, pantyhose, and high heels. I'm his little brother. mega FML

#20572069
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22626) - you deserved it (66242)

On 04/02/2013 at 6:52pm - misc - by SayCheese - Canada (British Columbia)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: