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Today, I had to explain to a cop that the reason I was speeding was because my girlfriend was in the hospital due to a car accident. He was working the accident just ten minutes before and saw me leave behind the ambulance. He still gave me a ticket. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26269) - you deserved it (4431)
On 02/28/2012 at 12:10pm - misc - by KidJwal - United States
Today, I get to stand in the unemployment line for the second time in a year because my company can't pay me. My parents own the company. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21827) - you deserved it (2288)
On 02/28/2012 at 8:27am - work - by Jaxur05 - United States
Today, my grandma seemingly decided that it was a really nice day to put my cat in the dryer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21658) - you deserved it (1514)
On 02/28/2012 at 7:46am - animals - by JeffeeBojangles - United States (Texas)
Today, I ordered Chinese food. As I approached the restaurant to pick it up, I took out my keys and tried to unlock the front door. By the time I realized my mistake, everyone inside the restaurant had noticed and started laughing at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8452) - you deserved it (13438)
On 02/27/2012 at 4:58pm - misc - by Eric - United States
Today, I called my husband, who is currently stationed in Japan, to see how he was doing. According to his girlfriend, he's doing fine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36241) - you deserved it (1826)
On 02/27/2012 at 12:42pm - love - by unknown - United States
Today, after suffering with bad constipation and having to eat special bread to get me to go, I have practically just pooped out a week's worth of food in 15 minutes, and I'm still going. I've passed the ring of fire stage, now I just can't feel my asshole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (119) - you deserved it (2725)
On 02/27/2012 at 10:55am - health - by awhmaaan - United Kingdom
Today, I realized how bad my feelings of inadequacy compared to other women and jealousy are when I started thumbing down songs on Pandora simply because the cover art had a better looking woman than me on it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5886) - you deserved it (17736)
On 02/26/2012 at 5:18pm - misc - by Larentiah (woman) - United States
Today, an African-American family came into the restaurant at which I work. They said, "Jackson, party of 5." After I laughed, I realized they were serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13947) - you deserved it (20565)
On 02/26/2012 at 10:31am - work - by Miss_Kristen - United States (Missouri)
Today, the captain of my school's girls wrestling team asked me out. I politely declined. She angrily locked me in the trunk of my own car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26124) - you deserved it (4048)
On 02/26/2012 at 1:12am - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was babysitting. Everything was going well until the kid called 911 on me for making him eat his vegetables. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25209) - you deserved it (2456)
On 02/26/2012 at 12:16am - kids - by whattabrat - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I discovered that during fire drills, my school lines everyone up next to some extremely flammable and explosive propane tanks. If we ever have a real fire, we will all die. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22611) - you deserved it (1616)
On 02/25/2012 at 11:18pm - misc - by afraidtoburn (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I decided to take a peek in my fiancé's vow book to see how far he's got. The only thing in there was the lyrics to a song from the movie Shrek. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7949) - you deserved it (16145)
On 02/25/2012 at 11:09pm - misc - by KMO - United States
Today, I was washing dishes when I picked up a plate and saw a huge spider. Trying to be nice, I took the plate outside and tried to gently push the spider off. The wind blew it into my eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22488) - you deserved it (3654)
On 02/25/2012 at 10:13pm - misc - by baconandkittens (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I found the list my wife made of the things she was going to give up for Lent. The first one was "Sex with other men". FML
I agree, your life sucks (31719) - you deserved it (2118)
On 02/25/2012 at 9:35am - intimacy - by fmylifebigtime - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my 18-year old son decided to run his hand over our wooden fence to try and get a splinter, as he "forgot what they felt like." Last month, he stabbed himself in the arm with a sewing needle because he "forgot what an injection feels like." I raised this idiot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25634) - you deserved it (5652)
On 02/25/2012 at 6:25am - misc - by badmom (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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