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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, I went to the dorm showers to use the facilities. As I was getting in the shower, I slipped and landed face first into a puddle. It wasn't water. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21918) - you deserved it (1380)
On 03/07/2012 at 11:25am - misc - by whatawaste - United States (Indiana)
Today, my new roommate told me he was bisexual. A little concerned, I opened up and told him that made me uncomfortable. His reply: "Oh don't worry, I'm only attracted to good looking guys." FML
I agree, your life sucks (9798) - you deserved it (38439)
On 03/07/2012 at 9:01am - misc - by Leland - Canada (Quebec)
Today, my mom told me that Walmart had called and I had an interview at 9:30. I went to Walmart. They told me they didn't have any interviews set up. I went back home and listened to the voice-mail on her cellphone. It was the Subway in Walmart. I've been looking for a job for 3 months. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17039) - you deserved it (3288)
On 03/07/2012 at 6:14am - work - by Jake (man) - United States (Idaho)
Today, my boyfriend decided to piss in the shower while I was standing next to him. I did not mind, until I realised the water flows away incredibly slowly. I had to stand in his piss while the shower filled itself with the sweet odor of fresh urine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15990) - you deserved it (4313)
On 03/07/2012 at 5:28am - misc - by DjeePee (woman) - Belgium (Antwerpen)
Today, I was cooking and I burned my thumb. I had some first-aid burn spray, so I sprayed it on. I went outside to smoke a cigarette, and when I flicked my lighter, my thumb went up in flames. Turns out that first-aid burn spray is flammable. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9369) - you deserved it (29053)
On 03/07/2012 at 1:29am - health - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I had to bury my horse again because coyotes keep digging it up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31757) - you deserved it (2043)
On 03/06/2012 at 11:03pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)
Today, I approached the girl I like, hoping to ask her out. Just as I strode up to her, she excused herself as quickly as she could. I then realized I'd forgotten to zip up my pants after going to the bathroom minutes before. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9149) - you deserved it (12340)
On 03/06/2012 at 1:55pm - love - by Tommy (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was fired from my job. My boss claimed it was because I smelled like alcohol, never mind the fact that my job was brew master at a beer company. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24510) - you deserved it (1302)
On 03/06/2012 at 12:05pm - work - by sdk2010 (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I choked on a gummy bear and ended up in the emergency room. The first thing the doctor said to me was, "Well, that must have been 'beary' uncomfortable." The entire room burst into laughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19893) - you deserved it (6929)
On 03/05/2012 at 7:43pm - health - by Kayla - United States
Today, a stuffed ferret was the latest addition to the list of weird items my colleagues have found in our rubbish tip, and that they put in my office. The list also includes explicit fetish porn playing cards, live ammo and dead pheasants, to name a few. I need a new job. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13103) - you deserved it (1470)
On 03/05/2012 at 11:36am - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Gateshead)
Today, I had to ask my mum not to meditate while driving. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14378) - you deserved it (1191)
Today, things were getting heated with my boyfriend and I told him that I was finally ready to lose my virginity. Clearly he couldn't wait to get started because he fell asleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18454) - you deserved it (2528)
On 03/04/2012 at 2:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I went to a Mexican restaurant with my family. I got stuck trying to decide whether I should get the fajitas or the tacos. I ended up getting the tacos because I didn't want the fajitas to come in sizzling, and I didn't want to "make a scene". My social anxiety has hit a new low. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14682) - you deserved it (3863)
On 03/03/2012 at 10:09pm - misc - by mexicandelicacy (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I downloaded an application that notifies me when my phone is fully charged. I had no idea how it actually functions, but I plugged the charger in and went to bed. A couple of hours later, I woke up to a man's voice screaming, "I can't take it anymore!" I nearly wet myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23023) - you deserved it (6919)
On 03/03/2012 at 8:55am - misc - by scaredshitless (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)
Today, my girlfriend revealed to me that she has primeisodophobia. What is primeisodophobia, you may ask? Well, it's the fear of losing your virginity. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24592) - you deserved it (3412)
On 03/03/2012 at 8:23am - intimacy - by virginkiller (man) - Singapore
Monday 20 May 2013
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