MWhinery95

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Offline (the 02/02/2014 at 3:51am)

MWhinery95

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 15485
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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MWhinery95's page activity

Visits<b>NaN101</b> - the 04/14/2013 at 5:24am<b>MrEd</b> - the 12/14/2012 at 4:46am<b>bryan788</b> - the 11/19/2012 at 7:41pm<b>ladydragonstars</b> - the 10/27/2012 at 1:12pm<b>FMyLifeGod040</b> - the 08/21/2012 at 3:30pm<b>RussianFox</b> - the 07/12/2012 at 1:23pm<b>DocBastard</b> - the 07/12/2012 at 1:01pm<b>itsa_maddy</b> - the 07/12/2012 at 12:52am<b>ydi_4_suking</b> - the 07/11/2012 at 4:26am<b>arennie13</b> - the 07/11/2012 at 12:25am<b>l_teil</b> - the 07/10/2012 at 10:57am<b>uberdubers</b> - the 07/10/2012 at 8:12am<b>Abruun</b> - the 07/10/2012 at 5:46am<b>Iz_Dolan</b> - the 07/09/2012 at 10:50pm<b>erin37</b> - the 07/09/2012 at 10:22pm<b>jwbfml</b> - the 07/09/2012 at 8:15pm<b>kvdfan</b> - the 07/09/2012 at 6:31pm<b>MrBrightside21</b> - the 07/09/2012 at 11:53am

MWhinery95's FML badges

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You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

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I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of MWhinery95's badges

MWhinery95's favorite FMLs

Today, whilst stacking the dish washer I dropped a steak knife. Luckily, I caught it just before it hit my foot. I fist-pumped to celebrate my amazing catch and stabbed myself in the cheek. My parents couldn't stop laughing all the way to the hospital. FML

by zztopspinner / 03/14/2012 at 3:11pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to explain to my friend that the world did not used to be black and white. It was just the pictures that were. She still doesn't believe me. She's eighteen. FML

by CierraJordan / 03/14/2012 at 7:31am / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML

by daddy-o / 03/14/2012 at 3:51am / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous

Today, a Russian guy came up to me on the train and informed me that I look exactly like a typical Russian woman. He then went on to explain that I even had enough fat to survive their cold winters. FML

by Anonymous / 03/14/2012 at 2:15am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad was driving me to college. I'd cracked a joke about how old people like him shouldn't be allowed to drive, and I guess he took it personally, what with him speeding straight up to the parking lot wall, and only braking after I started shrieking in terror. FML

by Emma Five / 03/13/2012 at 11:22pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Transportation

Today, I got back to work at my hospital after some sick leave. The first jackass to waste my time was a guy with leg lacerations. This, he claimed, was because he tried to break a samurai sword over his leg as part of a bet. It's day one and already I want to kill myself. FML

by Simms / 03/13/2012 at 10:32pm / United States / Work

Today, I hooked up with my ex-girlfriend, after she confessed to still being in love with me. I logged into Facebook after she left, only to find her status set to "I think I just made a big mistake." FML

by Anonymous / 03/13/2012 at 7:12pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, my dad insisted on having a family movie night. He chose the movies Jaws and Mayday. I'm going on a diving expedition tomorrow. FML

by Samantha / 03/13/2012 at 1:59pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my therapist gave me some great self-sufficiency advice. It sounded familiar. When I got home I realized she had been quoting Christina Aguilera songs. For £100 an hour. FML

by PixieWrists / 03/13/2012 at 1:33pm / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Health

Today, while at work, a man came up to me and screamed that I was the devil's child, pointing at the tattoo on my wrist the whole time. I just stood there while he prayed for my soul. FML

by lovefortoday / 03/13/2012 at 12:50pm / United States (Indiana) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I woke up sweating and gasping for air after having a terrible nightmare. The nightmare involved my deceased mother-in-law bitching me out for being a bad influence on her daughter and threatening to cut my nuts off. Even in death, she won't leave me be. FML

by lanu / 03/13/2012 at 12:13pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my resume contained the word "masturbation" in the skills section, courtesy of a practical joke by my best friend. I have been using this CV unsuccessfully for over two months. FML

by Anonymous / 03/13/2012 at 8:51am / Netherlands (Noord-Holland) / Intimacy

Today, I realized that I am so sexually deprived that I get aroused when plugging my headphones into my computer. FML

by Wow / 03/13/2012 at 12:38am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I got a hand cramp from popping zits on my face. FML

by pagvscgrac / 03/13/2012 at 12:03am / United States (Missouri) / Health

Today, I realized how poor I am when I had to use sharpies to color in the worn spots on my dress shoes before leaving for work. FML