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MWhinery95

Offline (the 02/02/2014 at 3:51am) | Search for a member

MWhinery95

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 8498
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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MWhinery95's page activity

Visits<b>NaN101</b> - the 04/14/2013 at 5:24am<b>MrEd</b> - the 12/14/2012 at 4:46am<b>bryan788</b> - the 11/19/2012 at 7:41pm<b>ladydragonstars</b> - the 10/27/2012 at 1:12pm<b>FMyLifeGod040</b> - the 08/21/2012 at 3:30pm<b>RussianFox</b> - the 07/12/2012 at 1:23pm<b>DocBastard</b> - the 07/12/2012 at 1:01pm<b>itsa_maddy</b> - the 07/12/2012 at 12:52am<b>ydi_4_suking</b> - the 07/11/2012 at 4:26am<b>arennie13</b> - the 07/11/2012 at 12:25am<b>l_teil</b> - the 07/10/2012 at 10:57am<b>uberdubers</b> - the 07/10/2012 at 8:12am<b>Abruun</b> - the 07/10/2012 at 5:46am<b>Iz_Dolan</b> - the 07/09/2012 at 10:50pm<b>erin37</b> - the 07/09/2012 at 10:22pm<b>jwbfml</b> - the 07/09/2012 at 8:15pm<b>kvdfan</b> - the 07/09/2012 at 6:31pm<b>MrBrightside21</b> - the 07/09/2012 at 11:53am

MWhinery95's FML badges

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You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of MWhinery95's badges

MWhinery95's favorite FMLs

Today, I started a new blog that I've been planning for weeks. So far, the only comments I've received are a dozen spam links, two people correcting my grammar, and a lady telling me I'm going to burn in hell for calling the Pope a noob. FML

Today, I witnessed my husband swat a coffee bean over and over again, all the while mistaking it for a fly. I then figured he probably has a lower IQ than I do, which wouldn't be so bad if mine wasn't a few points away from minor retardation. FML

#19340403
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20256) - you deserved it (5501)

On 03/24/2012 at 7:06pm - misc - by sheilob (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I started my research project on horror stories and people's fascination with them. I did some research and wound up reading H.P. Lovecraft. On the upside, I can now pee more easily. On the downside, it's likely to be in my pants. FML

#19340135
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15330) - you deserved it (3780)

On 03/24/2012 at 6:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend decided to pleasure me with a handjob. It was incredibly painful because she didn't understand that my foreskin isn't as flexible as she thought it to be. I didn't have the heart to tell her to stop until she asked, "Is it supposed to turn this color?" FML

#19336672
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27819) - you deserved it (10498)

On 03/24/2012 at 1:30am - intimacy - by purple - United States (Texas)

Today, in health class we were watching a documentary about anxiety. My teacher asked if any of us often feel anxious. I was too anxious to raise my hand, and went into a minor panic attack. FML

#19332021
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24775) - you deserved it (4102)

On 03/23/2012 at 10:23am - health - by cjd - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. Let's just say pubes and toilet paper residue were the least of my problems. FML

#19330918
325 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47187) - you deserved it (4595)

On 03/23/2012 at 1:55am - intimacy - by mrricecakes (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was learning to drive a stick when a cop decided to pull me over just to laugh at me. FML

#19327826
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20974) - you deserved it (2857)

On 03/22/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by Chey - United States (California)

Today, while I was on the bus to work, a morbidly obese man sat down next to me. When my stop came and I stood up to get off, he just looked at me, said with a smirk, "good luck with that," and went back to reading his paper. I missed my stop. FML

#19326564
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27957) - you deserved it (2432)

On 03/22/2012 at 2:00pm - misc - by busfail - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out what a bottle of regurgitated wine looks like on white bedsheets. FML

#19325916
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14424) - you deserved it (8636)

On 03/22/2012 at 10:59am - health - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had to re-grade a student's assignments because neither he, nor his parents can read "Spanish." I'd written in cursive. FML

#19324505
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27566) - you deserved it (3586)

On 03/22/2012 at 1:13am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I was waiting for a call from a job I had applied for. When the phone rang, I ran as fast I could up the stairs, falling and slamming my shin on the way. The call? It was a woman asking me, "Hi, do you have time to learn about our lord Jesus Christ?" FML

#19324398
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21912) - you deserved it (4984)

On 03/22/2012 at 12:56am - work - by Atheist (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boyfriend went down on me with whiskey in his mouth. It felt like my genitals were on fire. FML

#19324348
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25088) - you deserved it (6118)

On 03/22/2012 at 12:46am - intimacy - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I found out that sex in the woods is amazing. I also found that the roar of a nearby bear will end the amazement. Not only was I cock blocked by a bear, I almost shit myself. FML

#19323804
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26915) - you deserved it (6303)

On 03/21/2012 at 11:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I saw an article about how some people think internet access is more important than sex. I asked my boyfriend which he thought was more important. He chose internet access. FML

#19322341
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19710) - you deserved it (6366)

On 03/21/2012 at 7:58pm - intimacy - by justwow (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, while driving home from school, I noticed one of our hot quarterbacks in the car behind me. Trying to impress him, I pulled into the driveway of an expensive-looking house. To my horror, he pulled in behind me and asked what I was doing at his house. FML

#19320311
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9981) - you deserved it (61393)

On 03/21/2012 at 1:12pm - kids - by brooke (woman) - United States (Florida)



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