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MRflyingplatypus

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MRflyingplatypus

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 10 August 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 642
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About MRflyingplatypus : Hey, person visiting my profile! There is nothing really to see, but if you want, feel free visit!

MRflyingplatypus's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of MRflyingplatypus's badges

MRflyingplatypus's favorite FMLs

Today, I was getting intimate with my husband on our anniversary day. He climbed on top of me and firmly placed his penis on my nose. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he burst into laughter and said I looked just like Squidward. FML

#18083202
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40458) - you deserved it (5223)

On 10/26/2011 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while taking a stroll in the park, a kid walked up to me and asked, "Do you believe in unicorns?" I answered, "No." He dunked his ice cream cone on my head, laughed hysterically, and ran off screaming, "BELIEVE!" FML

#17737717
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27947) - you deserved it (11467)

On 09/13/2011 at 5:21pm - misc - by unicorn - United States (Georgia)

Today, my husband compared me to his parent's dog. Why? Because when I sleep I fart and scare myself awake... Just like his parents dog. FML

#17671695
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24972) - you deserved it (9242)

On 09/05/2011 at 3:19pm - animals - by anonomys (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, after watching Insidious, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to scare me while I was on the toilet. I was in mid-piss when he jumped out at me, and I ran screaming and peeing down the hall. FML

#17206347
354 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40977) - you deserved it (10094)

On 07/21/2011 at 5:24pm - love - by toni405 - United States

Today, I got mugged. I also got an extra kick in the face for not having money in my wallet. FML

#17131745
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32909) - you deserved it (3267)

On 07/16/2011 at 2:23am - money - by Tanner - United States (Tennessee)

Today, the plant on my windowsill fell and landed in my face while I was napping. It's a cactus. FML

#17123749
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38647) - you deserved it (7187)

On 07/15/2011 at 3:51pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, after being out of the closet for over three years, I learned that some of my friends still don't believe me that I am really a lesbian. They still think I made the whole thing up because I can't get a man. FML

#16099797
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35270) - you deserved it (7420)

On 05/09/2011 at 12:03am - love - by Just_do_it_17 (woman) - United States

Today, my son and I attended my mother's funeral. It was the first time he'd been to such an event, so to ease his grief and distract him, I turned on Max and Ruby when we got home. He quickly broke into tears; apparently, it was the episode where Max and Ruby prepare their grandma a special birthday gift. FML

#14950396
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31159) - you deserved it (4420)

On 02/12/2011 at 1:57pm - misc - by sadcartoons (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend. I started to come, screaming, "Ah... ah... ah... AHH!" To which he added, "Staying alive! Staying alive!" FML

#14608705
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30632) - you deserved it (19916) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 1:24am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I bleached my hair. Not only did it fry, it also has a very noticeable green tint and because of the damage, I can't dye it again for a while. Now I keep getting asked "Why so serious?" by my friends. FML

#14600579
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9694) - you deserved it (28245)

On 01/16/2011 at 12:18pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Torbay)

Today, I rented a copy How To Train Your Dragon for my young son to watch. I put the DVD in, hit play without paying attention, and went off to make lunch. A few minutes later, my son ran into the kitchen screaming. Apparently, there was a mix up at the rental store and I got a copy of Saw IV. FML

#14337359
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38034) - you deserved it (10289)

On 12/25/2010 at 6:21pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, the elevator got stuck in between floor 4 and 5 at my doctors office. I had been having violent diarrhea. It was the reason I was at the doctor. Elevator was stuck for 35 minutes. During that time, I diarrhea'd in my pants twice. There were seven other people in the elevator. FML

#14187537
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (98694) - you deserved it (5402)

On 12/13/2010 at 4:16am - health - by Christopher - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was making out with this guy, and I ask him if he wants to take my bra off. He has some trouble getting it off and says, "This is strange, I do it for my sister all the time." FML

#14129951
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47410) - you deserved it (5522)

On 12/08/2010 at 9:34am - intimacy - by fme (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found my favorite stuffed animal I had as a child in the trash bin. I took it out to find that it felt wet and smelt funny. Apparently, my younger brother cut a hole in the butt of it and used it to masturbate. FML

#13145011
311 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50029) - you deserved it (3466)

On 09/21/2010 at 6:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I had a dream I was going the bathroom. I then woke up peeing, but I didn’t wet the bed yet. As I ran to the bathroom while half asleep and in the dark, I rammed into the wall. On my way back to bed, I tripped and accidentally slapped my fiancé in an effort to stop myself from falling over. FML

#10804191
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24953) - you deserved it (4369)

On 05/27/2010 at 6:50pm - misc - by Fark (woman) - United Kingdom (Cumbria)



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