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Offline (the 08/23/2014 at 11:06am) | Search for a member
About MRflyingplatypus : Hey, person visiting my profile! There is nothing really to see, but if you want, feel free visit!
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Today, while in Walmart, I noticed an old man who had been following me for about five minutes. I politely pulled over with my cart and smiled at him so he could pass. He then said with a creepy smile, "So it's your turn to stare at my butt now?" It's the most attention I've gotten in weeks. FML
Today, I got a text from my mom saying, "I heard the cupcake store got robbed. Where are you?" Then she texted back, "Oh never mind, they wanted money, not cupcakes. It wasn't you." Very funny, Mom. FML
Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML
Today, my husband called me to the bedroom to show me something. This "something" was him demonstrating his seemingly well-trained ability to accurately type out a sentence on my phone using nothing but his erect penis. FML
Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML
Monday 1 September 2014