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MRflyingplatypus

Offline (the 12/15/2014 at 4:04pm) | Search for a member

MRflyingplatypus

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 10 August 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 854
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About MRflyingplatypus : Hey, person visiting my profile! There is nothing really to see, but if you want, feel free visit!

MRflyingplatypus's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of MRflyingplatypus's badges

MRflyingplatypus's favorite FMLs

Today, I posted on Facebook saying I'm in a new relationship. One of my buddies said, "You're cheating on Jill?" My girlfriend saw this and went completely nuts, not giving me a chance to explain that "Jill" is just a euphemism for your hand. FML

#19401228
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26566) - you deserved it (5245)

On 04/03/2012 at 2:10pm - love - by jackmehoffa (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my eleven year old daughter called me a moron, after I told her she was dead wrong when she claimed that rabbits lay eggs. FML

#19376586
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22844) - you deserved it (4592)

On 03/30/2012 at 2:44pm - kids - by James (man) - United States

Today, my best friend stopped by my house, borrowed a movie, and left. That was the extent of our communication for the day. Today is my birthday. FML

#19355231
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26777) - you deserved it (2069)

On 03/27/2012 at 12:27am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, a little girl looked at me and yelled "Mommy look, there's a real leprechaun!" FML

#19296318
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23801) - you deserved it (2405)

On 03/17/2012 at 8:48pm - kids - by Redhead4life (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got threatened with a gun through the drive thru speaker because I didn't offer some guy any pies to go with his meal. FML

#19291503
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23787) - you deserved it (2801)

On 03/17/2012 at 12:37am - work - by CDeVeney92 - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend compared my penis to a snake. Not because of the size or shape, but because a snake is not something she imagines herself ever touching. FML

#19281835
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29598) - you deserved it (3285)

On 03/15/2012 at 7:50am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was humming the Star Wars theme song while on the bus. When my stop came I walked down the aisle only to hear a girl mutter, "The virginity is strong in this one." She's right. FML

#19249399
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22960) - you deserved it (18526)

On 03/10/2012 at 1:50am - misc - by starboy - United States (California)

Today, my stomach muscles are still sore from yesterday. Not because I was doing sit-ups or working out or anything, but because I have to work that hard to take a dump. FML

#19218183
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18918) - you deserved it (5650)

On 03/05/2012 at 12:12am - health - by wtbfiber (man) - United States

Today, while making my daily offering of turd to the porcelain throne, I took out my phone and started playing a game. I suddenly felt a tickling sensation on my leg, and I freaked out as I saw hundreds of ants had emerged from behind the toilet. FML

#19215354
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29833) - you deserved it (3908)

On 03/04/2012 at 5:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, the boy I tutor failed his math test. As a result, the family fired me. The boy failed because he forgot to write his name at the top. FML

#19190848
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33961) - you deserved it (1886)

On 02/29/2012 at 7:01pm - kids - by Fairy31 (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, after suffering with bad constipation and having to eat special bread to get me to go, I have practically just pooped out a week's worth of food in 15 minutes, and I'm still going. I've passed the ring of fire stage, now I just can't feel my asshole. FML

#19174199
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35100) - you deserved it (5315)

On 02/27/2012 at 10:55am - health - by awhmaaan - United Kingdom

Today, I was having sex with my husband. We thought the house was empty so we didn't mind being loud. Apparently, my grandma thought it would be fun to give us a surprise visit. All I found was a note on the counter from her and the spare key saying "Next time, I'll call." FML

#19169657
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30529) - you deserved it (4085)

On 02/26/2012 at 7:02pm - intimacy - by . - United States (California)

Today, I cut myself while shaving my globes. My girlfriend now refuses to stop teasing me about being "fisted by Edward Scissorhands." FML

#19167589
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21014) - you deserved it (7137)

On 02/26/2012 at 12:42pm - intimacy - by still learning - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I was babysitting. Everything was going well until the kid called 911 on me for making him eat his vegetables. FML

#19164733
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30419) - you deserved it (2851)

On 02/26/2012 at 12:16am - kids - by whattabrat - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I finally broke down and told my mom that I'd relapsed with my eating disorder. She told me to quit whining and eat a burger because she didn't want to pay for another therapy session. FML

#19142645
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25140) - you deserved it (10109)

On 02/22/2012 at 10:49pm - health - by SmallTownCutie -



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