LuminousKing

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LuminousKing

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 19 August 1995 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1714
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About LuminousKing : Nothing you need to know.

LuminousKing's page activity

Visits<b>bookgirl_7</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 6:06pm<b>Cian_1</b> - the 04/22/2013 at 2:26am<b>BellaBelle</b> - the 04/22/2013 at 1:32am<b>lo_and_behold</b> - the 04/22/2013 at 12:55am

LuminousKing's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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LuminousKing's favorite FMLs

Today, after backpacking acrossing Europe for a month, I picked up my dog from the doghouse. No one will listen to me or acknowledge the fact that he's now missing two toes. FML

by tagteam / 07/05/2012 at 12:30pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals

Today, my wife, who is four months pregnant, burst into tears while thinking about the armchair in our living room that we never use. According to her, we're stopping it from living out its destiny as an armchair. FML

by FauteuilEver Alone / 07/05/2012 at 4:11am / France / Miscellaneous

Today, my dog was licking the dishes in the dishwasher when his collar got stuck on it. Then he got scared of the dishwasher rack following him and ran away really fast. Now I have no dishes. FML

Today, I was talking with my wife of five years, and I gave her a few hints about wanting kids. After our talk, she looked at me completely serious and said "Yeah, yeah, kids are great and all, but can't we just get you a dog?" FML

by Richard / 06/24/2012 at 11:03pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, I mistook my dog's head for the gear shift while tearing down the highway. FML

by hakura madada / 06/22/2012 at 3:41pm / Japan (Tokyo) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the gynecologist. As she was checking me out, she said, "Wow. So you must get wet a lot." It took me several minutes to realize she was talking about my job bathing dogs. FML

by Anonymous / 06/20/2012 at 7:08pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

by 16590 / 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm / Sweden / Transportation

Today, I approached a cute girl at a club, when she started barking at me like a rabid dog. Thinking she might be mentally unhinged, I left, only to see the same girl laughing her ass off with her friends minutes later. When I went back over, her friends started barking at me too. FML

by Anonymous / 06/05/2012 at 3:34pm / United States (Idaho) / Miscellaneous

Today, my fiancé and I broke up, and he won't answer my calls or texts. I don't want him back; he has my dog. FML

by Anonymous / 05/30/2012 at 1:25am / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents. My dad turns around and says he was expecting him to have a guide dog. This is why I don't have much confidence in myself. FML

by hitnmiss66 / 05/27/2012 at 8:31pm / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had finally gotten my dogs to quiet down and my baby to fall asleep. Not thirty seconds later, my neighbor's car alarm went off. They aren't home for the weekend, and the damn alarm has now been blaring for three hours. FML

by shadow1248 / 05/27/2012 at 1:06am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I ran out of the house after my dog, tripped and knocked myself out on the railing by the front step. I woke up to my little brother lifting up the back of my dress for the neighborhood to see. FML

by Never Work With Animals or Children / 05/26/2012 at 7:06am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I was discharged from the hospital after having scrotal surgery. When I got home, the anesthetic had worn off, but I felt okay. Then my dog jumped up at me, paws slamming straight into my nuts. FML

by shanxi / 05/23/2012 at 2:47pm / United States / Health

Today, my fiancé and I planned a romantic movie night. Champagne, popcorn, romantic comedy. Then his friend decided to show up and they've been talking about 1st generation Pokémon ever since. FML

by Anonymous / 05/21/2012 at 7:14pm / United States / Love

Today, I came home to find a note on my door from the neighbor saying "I saw a coyote eat your dog, but was afraid it was rabid." FML

by nick / 05/18/2012 at 3:22am / United States / Animals