Lozza

Search for a member

Lozza

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3622
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

Lozza's page activity

Visits<b>tacobutt</b> - the 07/10/2016 at 8:44pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 12:06am<b>senor_octubre</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 7:02pm<b>SlimDanny</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 12:36pm<b>HunkyMumbles</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 1:17am<b>Hunter2323</b> - the 09/01/2013 at 4:55pm<b></b> - the 01/10/2011 at 11:58pm<b>stlcards220</b> - the 12/05/2009 at 10:29am<b>ch2358</b> - the 11/25/2009 at 4:40pm<b>neophantom</b> - the 08/12/2009 at 3:43am<b>blargity</b> - the 07/30/2009 at 5:34pm<b>leoofbodom</b> - the 07/04/2009 at 3:23pm<b>mari0958</b> - the 07/04/2009 at 2:50pm<b>depinaariana</b> - the 07/01/2009 at 9:40pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 6:06am

Lozza's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Lozza's favorite FMLs

Today, I met with a friend who had gained some weight since I saw him last. After a friendly hug, I put my hand on his new man boob and, without thinking, left it there way too long. I realized that I was groping him and, in a panic, did the only thing I could think of. I patted it. Twice. FML

by Anonymous / 06/30/2009 at 6:19pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw a drunk guy hitting on a girl sitting alone at the bar. She insisted that her boyfriend was there, but he didn't relent. So I went over and put my arm around her and asked "Who's this guy?" He walked away, but then I felt a tap on my shoulder. It was her boyfriend. He broke my arm. FML

by Anonymous / 06/30/2009 at 2:57pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, I was riding my bike on the side of the road because there was no sidewalk. Then a car with a loud horn honked at me. Pissed off, I turned around and screamed "shut the fuck up!" It was my girlfriend's parents saying hi. FML

by ZZ / 06/29/2009 at 11:01pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, I was riding my bike on the side of the road because there was no sidewalk. Then a car with a loud horn honked at me. Pissed off, I turned around and screamed "shut the fuck up!" It was my girlfriend's parents saying hi. FML

by ZZ / 06/29/2009 at 11:01pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, I took a shower after I finished typing an important essay I've been working on for days. My computer illiterate mum shut the computer down when I was gone, without saving a thing. When I confronted her, she yelled at me for "wasting electricity". FML

by lifedamntough / 06/28/2009 at 7:49am / Singapore / Miscellaneous

Today, it was my birthday. Normally, the little office I work in throws a big party for every employee on their special day, but nothing was done for me, not even a "Happy Birthday" came my way. I didn't want to be rude, so I stayed silent. They didn't do anything because I was getting laid off. FML

by WitchQueenLiz / 06/28/2009 at 4:25am / United States (California) / Work

Today, I left my brand new iPod Touch outside. There had been a drought for the past 3 weeks. Not anymore. FML

by Anonymous / 06/28/2009 at 12:47am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, it's been a few days since I decided to give this girl I like the silent treatment.I've been writing on/off with her for a few weeks, but decided to stop a bit, to seem mysterious. When I logged on Facebook today, her status was "..is so happy that annoying guy has stopped writing to me!" FML

by jake / 06/27/2009 at 5:11pm / Denmark (Frederiksborg) / Love

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. I opened my eyes to see his eyes fixed on something else. I turned my head to see what was so interesting. He was on his iPhone looking up recipes for things to wrap in bacon. FML

by a_B_c_D_e_F_g / 06/27/2009 at 10:29am / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, my friend said he'd give me 20 bucks if I would ask out the ugliest girl in school. I did it. She rejected me. FML

by steven / 06/24/2009 at 11:33am / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, I was texting a friend of mine. She mentioned it was her dad's birthday. I typed "Tell him Happy Birthday for me!" and as I pressed send I remember her dad was dead. FML

by blind / 06/24/2009 at 8:11am / South Africa (Gauteng) / Miscellaneous

Today, I ran into an old student of mine at the grocery store. She didn't recognize me at first so I introduced myself as her old teacher. She looked taken aback for a moment, and then said, "Oh my God... you're still alive?" FML

by feelinblue / 06/23/2009 at 7:31am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom went to a psychic. The reason? She has convinced herself that I'm gay, even though I've told her that I'm not and never have been. The psychic disagreed. Apparently, I'm bicurious with one of my guy friends. Guess who my mom believes? FML

by Anonymous / 06/23/2009 at 1:28am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, while on the road I saw a turtle in the middle of the other lane. I slammed on my brakes and got out, holding up and pissing off several drivers on both sides of the highway. Getting closer to the turtle, I realized that it was not a turtle at all, but a very large pile of dog shit. FML

by Xtine / 06/23/2009 at 12:44am / United States (Virginia) / Animals

Today, my husband and I were getting it on when we heard a little giggle. I put on my robe and looked outside my room to find that no one was there. So we continued. I later called my seven year old son and out he came crawling from under the bed. FML

by Anonymous / 06/22/2009 at 7:41pm / United States (New York) / Love