About Loser10000 : I'm awesome.
Loser10000's FML badges
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Loser10000's favorite FMLs
Today, there must have been a wasp clinging to my front door because when I walked outside, it dropped between my glasses and my face and began stinging me all around my eye. I don't know if my eye is more swollen from the stings or from me repeatedly punching myself in the face. FML
by Screamslikeagirl / 09/27/2016 at 3:17pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
Today, while commuting to work on a peak hour train, I lost my balance and accidentally grabbed a bald mans head to steady myself. To make matters worse, the words "oh gosh, I'm so sorry. I thought you were a knob" came out of my mouth before I could think about what I was saying. FML
by ShameMonkey / 09/27/2016 at 6:15am / Australia (Victoria) / Transportation
Today, after living in my apartment for nearly a year, I heard my neighbor having a violent toilet session. Now I realize he's always been able to hear the wrath of my bowels too. We wave at each other every day. FML
by toilet_trouble / 04/19/2014 at 3:44am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/18/2014 at 9:19pm / Norway (Nordland) / Work
by Anonymous / 04/18/2014 at 8:14pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids
by Ow / 04/18/2014 at 7:09am / United States (Arizona) / Health
Today, I met up with an old friend of mine who acts in a TV show. I hadn't seen him in a long time, but I'd been watching episodes of the show almost daily, so when he showed up I could only see him as his TV character and not as my friend. I ended up calling him by his character's name. FML
by Confused / 04/16/2014 at 12:13am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was eating an apple in class. When I went to take a big bite, my teeth went right through the apple, causing me to scrape the apple right up my face. My nose then started to bleed. I'm now known as the girl who punched herself in the face with an apple. FML
by Nose bleed / 04/15/2014 at 10:48pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Health
Today, I heard my sister talking to my mom about me, saying that I have the ability to suck the life out of a room like a Dementor. I walked in and asked what she meant by that. My mom replied, "She means you're an asshole." I love you too, mom. FML
by jigglepuff / 02/09/2014 at 12:00pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
by the_lameo_geek / 10/20/2013 at 10:16pm / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous
by crappingrapping / 05/21/2013 at 11:01am / United States / Miscellaneous
by jfc, how just how / 05/19/2013 at 3:56pm / United Kingdom (Milton Keynes) / Miscellaneous
Today, in the doctor's waiting room, a little boy asked me for a cookie. I told him that I didn't have any. He replied, "But my mom says that ladies with big butts always have cookies in their handbags." FML
by grossesfesses / 05/15/2013 at 2:58am / France (Picardie) / Miscellaneous
Today, I wanted revenge on my college's drinks machine. For the past two days, it forgot to release a cup before pouring my coffee. This time, I had planned ahead; I put my money in, entered the code, and quickly inserted my own cup. It gave me hot water. FML
by Anonymous / 04/29/2013 at 3:25am / France / Money
Today, one of my 5-year-old son's teeth fell out, but he's quite scatterbrained and he lost it. He did however find my vibrating duck under my pillow, and is now crying because he thinks that I stole his tooth so that the tooth fairy would bring me a toy. FML
by laptitesouris / 03/31/2013 at 7:35pm / France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur) / Kids