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Lizzygirlleee

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Lizzygirlleee

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  • Number of visits : 388
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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Lizzygirlleee's page activity

Visits<b>null</b> - the 09/01/2009 at 1:27pm

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Lizzygirlleee's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally got into a yoga class with the instructor I've been crushing on for 2 years. As he walked closer to greet me, I lifted my leg over my head into a full split, and queefed obnoxiously loud. He responded with his gag reflex. FML

#3241027
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44837) - you deserved it (26732)

On 06/26/2009 at 12:51pm - misc - by LondonKitsch (woman) - United States

Today, I got a call from my son's second grade teacher. He happens to write and throw with both hands, and wanted to share this during show and tell. Apparently, he didn't know the word for this is ambidextrous, because his teacher told me, "Your son just told the whole class that he's bisexual!" FML

#3120236
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50312) - you deserved it (4919)

On 06/22/2009 at 2:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my 9 year old nephew found his way onto my iTunes. I now have 401 songs titled "aidfj3P" by "ffjiel". FML

#3115220
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54900) - you deserved it (6495)

On 06/22/2009 at 9:32am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Singapore

Today, a little girl standing next to me on the train suddenly hugged me. I thought maybe she was sad or I reminded her of someone, and hugged her back. Then she smiled, squeezed my lovehandles, and said "Honk, honk!" FML

#3030449
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38783) - you deserved it (6142)

On 06/19/2009 at 1:48pm - kids - by squeezable (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, In my science class I sit next to my friend Jill. My teacher always gets our names confused calling me Jill and her Liz. She decided to combine our names. I'm now known as Jizz. My teacher clearly has no idea what it means. FML

#2831839
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (139091) - you deserved it (9967)

On 06/12/2009 at 2:50pm - misc - by mcullen21 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML

#2772494
819 comments

I agree, your life sucks (119078) - you deserved it (73898)

On 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by badmom (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I got hypnotized at my school's variety show. Apparently, when asked to do something I enjoy doing, I began to violently hump the floor. FML

#2722142
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83821) - you deserved it (20393)

On 06/08/2009 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by OhGeez (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I had to give a presentation about Adolf Hitler. I wanted to point out he was a very good speaker, and could incite a crowd. Instead, what came out was 'Hitler's oral skills made everyone go wild with excitement" FML

#2508726
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36076) - you deserved it (61323)

On 06/01/2009 at 7:12pm - misc - by Cail (woman) - United States (New Jersey)



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