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LizzyBird13

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LizzyBird13

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 13 May 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 327
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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LizzyBird13's page activity

Visits<b>olpally</b> - the 09/13/2013 at 8:10pm<b>jojimugo</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 3:09am

LizzyBird13's FML badges

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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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LizzyBird13's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend called out the word "scalpel" when he orgasmed. He won't tell me why. FML

#20072555
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24796) - you deserved it (2541)

On 09/15/2012 at 3:36am - intimacy - by not the scalpel (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my teacher assigned us teams in a class debate. I landed on the team that had to argue the obviously wrong point of view. When I finished, my teacher told me and the entire class how much I disturbed her, and how I reminded her of Hitler and Napoleon. FML

#20058797
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24879) - you deserved it (2110)

On 09/05/2012 at 12:25pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my dad wants me to spray a wasp nest, because I'm the fittest family member and can run the fastest. The wasps are already angry, and I'm allergic to them. FML

#20052266
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23505) - you deserved it (1499)

On 09/01/2012 at 10:09am - health - by iliveintexas - United States (Texas)

Today, a small kid looked at me, screamed in terror, and hid behind his dad. I was just walking down the same aisle in the store. This is far from the first time it's happened. FML

#20051755
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19877) - you deserved it (2644)

On 09/01/2012 at 12:07am - kids - by KidKillah - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. I thought I'd be spontanous and spice things up, and gave her a spank across the butt. She started crying. FML

#20051213
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26727) - you deserved it (15755)

On 08/31/2012 at 5:31pm - intimacy - by jon (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I finally confronted my boyfriend and asked him if he was cheating on me. He got flustered and said, "Technically, I'm cheating with you, not on you." FML

#20049344
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30973) - you deserved it (2509)

On 08/30/2012 at 11:24am - love - by nice one (woman) -

Today, yet again, I was getting intimate with my shower head. Some complete genius decided to flush the toilet downstairs halfway through, which sent scalding-hot water all up in my privates. I've yet to find a comfortable sitting position. FML

#20046536
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16081) - you deserved it (37782)

On 08/28/2012 at 5:22pm - intimacy - by Bethany (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I turned on the TV just in time to see my picture on the news. I have no idea what they said about me. FML

#20043967
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29337) - you deserved it (2471)

On 08/27/2012 at 2:45am - misc - by masterman - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I fainted during my sister's wedding because my dress was too tight. When I woke up, she slapped me hard across the face. Why? Because I "took all the attention away" from her. FML

#20041726
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24315) - you deserved it (6836)

On 08/25/2012 at 9:58pm - health - by brylynn - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were talking about being super heroes. He said I could be "The Period" because I'm a bitch. FML

#20040696
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18557) - you deserved it (8143)

On 08/25/2012 at 8:47am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I realized how much I hate my girlfriend, when I got excited as the doctor told me I should refrain from having sex for the next two months. FML

#20035872
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9250) - you deserved it (26247)

On 08/22/2012 at 4:08pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was at Starbucks after having a rough day. The old man beside me was talking to his friend. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him point at me and say, "See that beautiful girl over there?" Flattered, I listened closer, until he finished his statement with, "She's gonna die." FML

#20031501
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23816) - you deserved it (1942)

On 08/20/2012 at 5:14am - misc - by scared to leave the house (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got into an argument with my girlfriend over how many sides a triangle has. I actually ended up drawing her a diagram. FML

#20029320
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23897) - you deserved it (3743)

On 08/19/2012 at 1:51am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my new husband is expecting two children: ours, due in January, and our 16-year-old neighbor's, due in March. FML

Today, my mom threw my tampons in the garbage and said that from now on, I'll be buying pads instead. Turns out she read a scare story going around by email that all the local teens are soaking their tampons in alcohol and inserting them anally to secretly get drunk. FML

#20018901
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27925) - you deserved it (1724)

On 08/13/2012 at 3:25pm - misc - by jannister (woman) - Germany (Thuringen)



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