About LittlestPrincess : life goal: becoming a crazy old cat lady.
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LittlestPrincess's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 04/03/2013 at 5:17am / United States / Kids
Today, I went to the supermarket to get some Easter gifts for my kids. At the register, I was verbally abused to the point of tears by the cashier, for having way too many items for the 12 items or less lane. I had 13. FML
by Anonymous / 03/30/2013 at 4:38pm / Germany (Bayern) / Miscellaneous
by Kendra_Nine / 01/16/2013 at 1:28pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by kk / 01/09/2013 at 11:07am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I overheard my mother telling my sister that she expects my marriage to fall apart any day now. Apparently, I have no concept of what "marriage" really means. My husband and I just celebrated our 7th anniversary, while my mother is planning her 5th wedding. FML
by alynna007 / 01/02/2013 at 5:31am / United States (Washington) / Love
Today, my neighbor went on vacation, leaving me in charge of his cat and dog. For some reason, he calls his dog "Cat" and his cat "Dog". There are two pet food containers, one labeled "Cat" and the other labeled "Dog". I have no idea which one goes to which animal. FML
by catdog / 01/02/2013 at 1:07am / United States (California) / Animals
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me with the prettiest, most simple ring I have ever seen. I called my sister to tell her the good news, and her response was, "I know. He had me steal the ring from Claire's." FML
by Anonymous / 12/30/2012 at 6:58pm / United States (Colorado) / Love
Today, my ex-boyfriend of over 4 years decided to turn up outside my house at 1am, drunk off his ass, to confess his love for me. When I told him I'd moved on and am happily engaged, he cried on the grass for an hour, then tried to steal my cat. FML
by Anonymous / 12/26/2012 at 12:18pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous
Today, while my husband and I are both stuck in the bathroom from food poisoning, our 3-year-old son is taking advantage of his freedom. All I can hear is banging noises and wild laughter. I'm afraid to leave the bathroom. FML
by Anonymous / 10/13/2012 at 7:37am / United States / Kids
by mustachioed / 09/29/2012 at 1:06am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my husband staggered home after a night of drinking. He was too intoxicated to find the toilet so he started to pee in the cat's litter box. Apparently, he was invading her territory and she attacked him. His scream as she bit and scratched him must have woken the whole world. FML
Today, I really had to pee while babysitting. Normally this isn't a problem, except the kids were sleeping and going potty would wake them up right before their parents were due home. Desperate, I decided to pee in a cup in the kitchen and wash it down the sink. Their parents came home mid-stream. FML
by fired / 05/13/2012 at 2:26am / United States (Oregon) / Work
Today, a repairman came to fix my couch, which is under warranty because the frame had broken in multiple places. To ensure I got a new couch out of the deal, I stabbed multiple holes into the cushion. The guy fixed the frame, but said there was nothing he could do about lacerations on the sofa. FML
by grovage / 05/02/2012 at 8:43pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was walking to the bus in my favorite jeans, and I felt a uncontrollable itch in my leg. I scratched and it went away, but then I felt something moving on my leg. I hadn't worn my jeans in so long that a spider had decided to make it a nest. FML
by Rissa Warrington / 03/09/2012 at 3:30am / Canada (British Columbia) / Health
- Today, I heard what sounded like high-pitched feminine moaning coming from my son's room. I knocked… Today, I found out my boyfriend had his phone taken away by his dad for this past week. I have been… Today, I went to surprise my boyfriend in the shower. I opened the door and there was a giant shit…