LissaMccracken

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Offline (the 08/15/2014 at 1:07am)

LissaMccracken

52Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 22 October 1995 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3076
  • Number of comments : 491
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About LissaMccracken : So sometimes I don't get messages right away and then when I do, I assume you don't want a reply anymore so if you message me... And I don't reply soon... Send more until I reply!
Okay now that's said...I'm Lissa, and I'm a vampire but its a secret shhhhh. I like stuff. I don't like some stuff too. Omg stuff. I don't know, ok bye.

LissaMccracken's page activity

Visits<b>Death_The_Kid15</b> - 11 hours ago<b>Sierra120</b> - yesterday at 1:52pm<b>lungjiao</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 10:35am<b>zeginger</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 4:06pm<b>tweak2011</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 3:50am<b>Helldemon</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 1:05am<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 6:55am<b>arngvader</b> - the 05/15/2016 at 11:40pm<b>TheCutestLizard</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 3:05am<b>emeraldarcher74</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 8:18pm<b>n_a_v_y</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 4:55am<b>hare</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 4:40am<b>1DisGR8</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 12:54am<b>kaleena97</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 4:05pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 9:10am<b>aperson69</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 6:19pm<b>lost1997</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 11:55am<b>noodlemantra</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 7:28am

Fucked!<b>Death_The_Kid15</b> - 5 hours ago<b>Helldemon</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 7:05am<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 12:56pm<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 12:33am<b>SorrowsReward</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 11:02pm<b>joco4</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 7:30am<b>Earth_walker</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 7:23pm<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 3:38pm<b>ImNotAnAlien</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 8:42am<b>Tenker</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 5:35am<b>pks2014</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 4:51am<b>Clapdaddy</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 3:58am<b>Maria121514</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 3:13am<b>RA91</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 1:36am<b>csjc</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 10:37pm<b>prout92340</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 10:34pm<b>dcam13</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 9:59pm<b>GrimReefer66</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 9:07pm

LissaMccracken's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of LissaMccracken's badges

LissaMccracken's favorite FMLs

Today, my fiancé said "Rachel" instead of my name when asked to repeat, "I take thee, Emily, to be my lawfully wedded wife." I was shocked, so he explained while laughing that he doesn't even know a Rachel. He ruined our wedding for a Friends quote. FML

by Emliy / 08/01/2014 at 1:06am / United States (Illinois) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was using a public restroom. After about a minute of me being in there, a little girl came in and started pounding on the door, screaming that she had to go. My pregnancy hormones are so bad that I almost burst into tears. FML

by LissaMccracken / 07/18/2014 at 9:04pm / United States (Arkansas) / Health

Today, I found out I have genital herpes. I'm a virgin. FML

by Anonymous / 06/20/2014 at 2:20pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, my students turned in their male figure artwork. One absolute idiot had the smart idea of drawing me and the TA as some kind of gay lovers. I was torn between disgust at the explicitness, anger at the disrespect, and yet awe at how well-drawn it was. FML

by confusing / 06/06/2014 at 3:00pm / Zimbabwe / Work

Today, I was waiting at the bus stop and noticed a girl that I played netball with. I ran across the road to meet her and she ran across the car park to meet me. We hugged and looked at each other slowly backing away as we both realised that we didn't know each other. FML

by Anonymous / 03/10/2014 at 8:26pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

by sabz21 / 01/26/2014 at 11:37pm / United States (Connecticut) / Work

Today, I walked in on my daughter lighting candles around one of her friends, who'd fallen asleep while her other friends chanted something in a different language. They still won't tell me what they were doing. FML

by Anonymous / 12/22/2013 at 10:36am / United States / Kids

Today, I sprayed down some ants in my house. In the sea of ant corpses was a single living ant seemingly cradling a dead one in its arms. I'm convinced I just became the villain in an epic tragedy. Now I have to live with my ant problem because I can't bear to tear another family apart. FML

by Blood on my hands / 08/07/2013 at 1:40am / United States / Animals

Today, my girlfriend was sitting on my lap at a birthday party. She thought it would be funny to fart. I came instantly. FML

by needsnewshorts / 07/15/2013 at 9:42pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, as a joke, my friends pushed me into the men's restroom and held the door shut. As I was trying to push the door open, I heard a voice behind me say, "Wow. Immaturity, huh?" I turned to find a guy taking a dump in one of the urinals. FML

by Anonymous / 07/01/2013 at 1:50am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I witnessed a large woman pee on a pregnancy test in the middle of a Walmart parking lot, clean herself off, then wander around with the test hanging out of her mouth, waiting for her result. Where in the name of Christ do these people come from? FML

by Anonymous / 06/02/2013 at 2:10pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML

by wtfmama / 05/04/2013 at 8:51am / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids

Today, I got caught masturbating, twice, by the same person. FML

by Anonymous / 04/28/2013 at 3:53pm / Saudi Arabia / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend of 2 weeks said that he was going to cook me dinner. After waiting for the frozen pizza that he decided to make for me to be completely cooked, he said, "Oh I hate this part", reached into the oven with his bare hands and took out the pizza, all while screaming. He is 24. FML

by Anonymous / 04/11/2013 at 11:42am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was making love to my boyfriend. He put me up against the wall and I yelled, "Harder!" without thinking. I heard the entire house go silent, my dad and his friends included. FML

by uhoh / 02/16/2013 at 12:27am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy