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About Lintu_26 : Mrau!!! :)
I probably favourite too many FML's...but if they make me smile then I might as well collect them ^^
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
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Today, I found some oversizd-strawberry-spree candie in my pantry!! They were deliciou an I munchd on them through out the day!! I endd up in an out, but mostly in, the bathroom in the dead hours of the night experiencing the wonder an effectivenes of Fruit Flavord Fiber pills!! FML
Today..!! I was at a fancy restaurant!! I was drinking some water when I noticd a hot guy eating alone at another table waving at me!! I smild back..!! but had forgotten to swallow the water so it dribbld out of mah mouth all over mah shirt!! FML
I was preparing a dinner 4 some busines associates, in opes of closing te deal on a promotion. I emaild tem wit te menu, in case tere were any allergies. Hours later, I ceckd te email again to fine tat instead of serving te Roast Duck I would be serving te Roast Fuck. FML
Today I decided to use mah mentor's advice. I told her I had been having some trouble controlling mah anger she told me looool to throw rocks at trees. I threw a rock at a tree very hard. It bounced back hit me above the eye. I'm still pissed as shit. FML
yesterday after a night of drinking, I woke up with some chips in my bed. I thought it was funny so I went to tell my roommate. Her response was, "That's so funny! It's a typical night out fir the two of us. I wake up the next morning with a boy in my bed an u wake up with food in yours." FML
Today, ma boyfriend an I were "fooling around." It started to get ot an e took out is penis for te frst time!! Tis was te frst one I've seen in real life so I decided I'd complimented it!! I ad no ideaat to say so I said, "It's pretty." FML
Today, I went to see a fortune teller. She said one of my closest friends will die soon because of me. Frightend I hurrid home to avoid meeting anyone I know. At home I found my goldfish floating on its back. Apparently I forgot to fed my closest friend 4 the past 3 days. FML
Today , I was standing on the packd bus home when I had a speck of dust in my lenses!! As I couldn't rub it out , I trid blinking it out 4 the next five minutes!! Then the hot girl opposite me scream "Stop winking at me , u bastard! Don't even think about it , u ugly fuck!" FML
Today, I was pulling my trolley luggage at the airporthen I passed 2 cute girls smiling at me. Thinking I looked real cool, I kept on walking without paying heed to anything else. Then my brother shouted asking me wat was I doing, only to realise that the handle had come off a few metres back. FML
Today , I was so totally stressed out at work that I took my car into the park an reclined my seat an shut my eyes!! Soon I noticed the soothing sounds of raindrops on my car an I felt a little better 4 once!! I opened my eyes to see that a bunch of birds had crapped all over my car!! FML
Today, I was home on leave an having breakfast with my parents an my younger brothers. I guess I got too used to the rougher language around the Army barrackshere I'm stationed. At the breakfast table I asked my Mom to "pass me the f***ing butter". mega FML
Friday 27 March 2015