Lilrico691

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Offline (the 11/06/2014 at 12:43am)

Lilrico691

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 15 October 1996 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 893
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Lilrico691 : My name is AJ. I like video games and watching tv. I enjoy playing with my dog. Swimming and lifting are my main sports.

Lilrico691's page activity

Visits<b>JoeTheBow</b> - the 02/18/2014 at 10:39pm<b>seninaa</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 4:12am<b>Neandertal</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 4:20pm<b>jazopalchris</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 7:51pm<b>skehar</b> - the 07/15/2013 at 8:38am<b>mattdwyer</b> - the 07/05/2013 at 1:40am<b>Tired123</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 4:45pm<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 11:35am<b>iloveshim</b> - the 05/26/2013 at 4:07am<b>margojill</b> - the 05/22/2013 at 11:54pm<b>SansVostro</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 8:42am<b>Shortay123</b> - the 05/18/2013 at 3:29pm<b>jaffvis</b> - the 05/18/2013 at 1:22pm<b>Tori1991</b> - the 05/17/2013 at 8:16pm<b>maddyharris97</b> - the 05/16/2013 at 8:33pm<b>PaigeLeeAnn11</b> - the 05/16/2013 at 1:43pm

Lilrico691's FML badges

Judgmental

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Lilrico691's badges

Lilrico691's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized how boring and sexually deprived my life is when I found a gas station ten cents cheaper than the one I usually use. It gave me both an asthma attack and an erection, simultaneously. FML

by the long distance guy / 04/08/2014 at 3:56am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had satanic gastric distress. Attempting to make light of this fact, and, being incredibly bored and seemingly alone at work, I managed to fart the intro to "Smoke on the Water" perfectly. Somebody clapped. FML

by Charlie529 / 02/19/2014 at 10:30am / South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my sister was taking forever in the bathroom, and I jokingly threatened to kick down the door. I rammed into it, and it actually bust almost off its hinges. My sister screamed and our parents came running. Now I'm grounded forever and our bathroom has no door. FML

by shit / 01/26/2014 at 1:20pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother kept nagging at me because my 9-month-old daughter only calms down when I play her metal. She demands I use gospel, otherwise she will turn into a "devil-worshipping lunatic like her mother". FML

by SlapAndTickle / 10/10/2013 at 11:04pm / United States / Kids

Today, I helped my brother propose to his girlfriend of 5 years in the spot where they had first met. As he delivered his heartfelt speech, a sizable crowd appeared. When he got down on one knee, she punched him in the gut, yelled, "I never loved you", and ran away. Now he won't talk to me. FML

by ElizaZee / 09/18/2013 at 9:45pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, while waitressing, I had a huge party. When everything was said and done I saw the tip they left me. It said on a napkin, "You're pretty. You can't put a value on a compliment." And that was it. I wish compliments paid the rent. FML

by Chellybelly92 / 07/01/2013 at 11:34am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Money

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, after spending four hours cooking food for a special family dinner, I went to take a shower before they arrived. I came back out less than twenty minutes later to find most of the food gone, and a very guilty-looking puppy. FML

by Auroraen / 06/27/2013 at 9:23pm / United States (Illinois) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I rode my motorcycle to an appointment and parked in the parking garage. When I got out, some ass had pushed my bike from the spot and had boxed it in between the wall and his car. Apparently, he felt he deserved the spot more than me and didn't care if I wanted to leave. FML

by MadMax / 06/26/2013 at 4:49pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Transportation

Today, a neighbor's kid decided to pick a fight with me because I'm "the new kid in town and need to learn who's in charge". When I told him I'm 27, he said excuses like that aren't going to get me off the hook. I just moved here and I'm already being harassed by a twelve year old. FML

by LyraAlluse / 06/26/2013 at 2:12pm / United States (Arizona) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I had to go to therapy for my fear of cats. All the way there, my girlfriend kept making cat noises and scratching at me. FML

by Anonymous / 06/26/2013 at 12:42pm / United States (Colorado) / Animals

Today, while walking around town, some guy grabbed me from behind, clutched at my nipples, and said, "That's where I always imagined they were." FML

by Anonymous / 06/25/2013 at 1:16pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally unfriended my roommate's mom on Facebook after months of her commenting on my wall multiple times a day and basically stalking me. After discovering this, she drove to our apartment to demand through hysterical tears that my roommate move out because I can't be trusted. FML

by nomomsonfacebook / 06/23/2013 at 8:30pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I took my cat to the vet. The creepy vet looked me in the eyes and said, "This isn't the only pussy I'll be checking out today." FML

by o_O / 06/23/2013 at 1:26pm / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad invited our very cute neighbor inside to introduce him to me. I was wearing pajamas and hadn't showered in two days due to being extremely sick. FML

by Selina / 06/22/2013 at 6:59pm / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous

Today, my drunk dad decided to wake me up by lobbing our cat directly into my now-mauled face. FML

by Anonymous / 06/21/2013 at 4:38pm / Netherlands (Noord-Brabant) / Animals