LemonandLime

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LemonandLime

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1905
  • Number of comments : 117
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 28 posted

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LemonandLime's page activity

Visits<b>Nina_Kristy</b> - the 08/31/2016 at 2:36pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 9:01am<b>mwali02</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 1:14am<b>Xhase</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 1:58am<b>jill97</b> - the 12/10/2015 at 11:52pm<b>Peyton_J_W</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 12:59pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 2:13pm<b>mrlawlor7777</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 4:01pm<b>Soleia_Grace</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 11:12am<b>Fuaaad1994</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 5:25am<b>aruden</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 6:11pm<b>sarmo1995</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 10:50am<b>colinlb</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 11:03pm<b>Star928</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 2:07am<b>hunteryager</b> - the 10/29/2013 at 7:36pm<b>Dawnstempest</b> - the 10/18/2013 at 6:08pm<b>piosc</b> - the 10/16/2013 at 6:30pm<b>feven52</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 4:07pm

Fucked!<b>mwali02</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 7:14am<b>RainCl0ud</b> - the 03/05/2016 at 11:52pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 11:37pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 8:13pm

LemonandLime's FML badges

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

50 favourites

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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LemonandLime's favorite FMLs

Today, as a joke, my friends pushed me into the men's restroom and held the door shut. As I was trying to push the door open, I heard a voice behind me say, "Wow. Immaturity, huh?" I turned to find a guy taking a dump in one of the urinals. FML

by Anonymous / 07/01/2013 at 1:50am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to my parents' house. I recently lost about 30 lbs. My mom hugged me and said, "Aww, you're not my chubby baby girl anymore." She then said she wished I were still fat because she missed it. She's the reason I lost the weight; she used to tease and taunt me. Thanks Mom. FML

by me / 06/28/2013 at 11:51am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, after working at my job for months, I quit. Why? My boss tried to convince me that we are in a secret relationship after he told me he loved me. FML

by unknown relationship / 06/28/2013 at 1:23am / United States (Illinois) / Work

Today, I was accused of shooting drugs at work. I was only feeding a baby bird that was tucked into my arm using a medicine syringe. I've been smuggling it to work because it has to eat every 2 hours or it will starve. Now everyone there thinks I'm a hardcore dope fiend. FML

by Gribby / 06/27/2013 at 7:56pm / United States (Missouri) / Animals

Today, my boss held my hair while I threw up. It's day two on the job. FML

by Anonymous / 06/21/2013 at 12:44am / United States (Washington) / Work

Today, I turned 29. To celebrate, my office got me a cake that read "Happy 38th!!" The "theme" of the "party" was 'Not a day over 35!' I waited all day for someone to tell me it was all a prank, but nobody did. I spent my lunch hour crying in my car. Happy birthday to me. FML

by Not a day over 35 / 06/18/2013 at 9:06am / United States (Alaska) / Work

Today, after years of researching and saving money, I got a pet fox. I was able to enjoy the majesty of the animal for three hours before it burrowed under the fence and ran away. FML

by SadFoxLady / 06/10/2013 at 2:01pm / United States (Iowa) / Animals

Today, my boyfriend and I watched the new movie "The Purge." After the movie, I jokingly asked him that if the U.S. had such a purge in real life, would he participate, and who would he kill first. Without missing a beat, he said, "you." FML

by purged / 06/08/2013 at 7:43pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 21-year-old girlfriend finally got the courage to tell her mom that she wanted to move in with me. It turns out she was right to be afraid; during the talk, her mother yelled at us, calling her a slut and saying she was too young to be "shacking up with some guy." FML

by MonsterInLaw / 06/08/2013 at 7:26pm / United States (Nebraska) / Love

Today, I found out why my daughter eats so many sugary baked goods. According to her, when you bake things, all the sugar and calories are "released" and so you can't gain weight from it. It seems I raised a moron. FML

by Anonymous / 06/08/2013 at 3:01pm / Australia (Western Australia) / Kids

Today, I found out why my daughter eats so many sugary baked goods. According to her, when you bake things, all the sugar and calories are "released" and so you can't gain weight from it. It seems I raised a moron. FML

by Anonymous / 06/08/2013 at 3:01pm / Australia (Western Australia) / Kids

Today, I received a note from my creepy ex, whom I broke up with two years ago, saying how much he still misses me. I live over 100 miles away from him now. The note was hand-delivered to my new address. FML

by joolsie / 05/15/2013 at 7:45pm / United Kingdom / Love

Today, I went to go see my granddad in the hospital and asked if he needed anything. He replied, "I need you to get out and send that hot nurse in, I may be old but I still got it." FML

by Anonymous / 05/06/2013 at 4:35am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I agreed to go on a date with the creepy guy from my Economics class because I'm so broke that I could really use the free meal. FML

by shameless / 04/28/2013 at 6:24pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML

by ironies a b*tch / 04/13/2013 at 1:04am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation