LemonandLime

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LemonandLime

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1903
  • Number of comments : 117
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 28 posted

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LemonandLime's page activity

Visits<b>Nina_Kristy</b> - the 08/31/2016 at 2:36pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 9:01am<b>mwali02</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 1:14am<b>Xhase</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 1:58am<b>jill97</b> - the 12/10/2015 at 11:52pm<b>Peyton_J_W</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 12:59pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 2:13pm<b>mrlawlor7777</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 4:01pm<b>Soleia_Grace</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 11:12am<b>Fuaaad1994</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 5:25am<b>aruden</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 6:11pm<b>sarmo1995</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 10:50am<b>colinlb</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 11:03pm<b>Star928</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 2:07am<b>hunteryager</b> - the 10/29/2013 at 7:36pm<b>Dawnstempest</b> - the 10/18/2013 at 6:08pm<b>piosc</b> - the 10/16/2013 at 6:30pm<b>feven52</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 4:07pm

Fucked!<b>mwali02</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 7:14am<b>RainCl0ud</b> - the 03/05/2016 at 11:52pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 11:37pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 8:13pm

LemonandLime's FML badges

Back from a party

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50 favourites

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of LemonandLime's badges

LemonandLime's favorite FMLs

Today, I was so sexually frustrated that I tried getting off with a banana. It was not enjoyable, for me or the banana. FML

by Kyra.45 / 10/03/2013 at 6:46pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, it's my wedding day. Almost a year ago I was in a terrible car accident that nearly left me paralyzed, but I worked my ass off to be able to walk down the aisle. After a lot of blood, sweat, and tears I made it to the big day... and woke up with food poisoning. FML

by somethingblue / 09/16/2013 at 5:11pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health

Today, my mum got engaged to her American pen-pal, who is in prison over there for murder. FML

by Stheno / 09/16/2013 at 8:49am / United Kingdom (Bristol, City of) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, a week after my dad discovered Family Guy and started mindlessly repeating catchphrases from it 24/7, I finally lost my temper and told him how incredibly annoying it is. He just paused, turned to look me in the eyes, and said, "Shut up, Meg." FML

by Anonymous / 09/06/2013 at 6:56pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I bought a cat. Somehow that cat is now stuck inside my antique piano. I have to break the piano to get her out. FML

by outthelabyrynth / 08/27/2013 at 10:46am / Netherlands (Noord-Holland) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was at an amusement park with my kids, when a girl in line next to us slipped a hand down her boyfriend's pants and started groping him. I politely asked her to stop, to which she snorted, "Why? Your kids've gotta learn the birds and bees somehow." FML

by pda / 08/24/2013 at 10:46pm / United States (New Jersey) / Kids

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old standing over me with a pillow. I asked him what he was doing, and he replied that he and Steve were playing a game, but Steve said I have to be asleep for it. Steve is my son's imaginary friend. I'm convinced Steve wants to kill me. FML

by DrtySnchez / 08/18/2013 at 5:37am / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, we were having a family dinner with my boyfriend's parents and mine. In the kitchen, when we were getting the food ready, he proposed. I screamed. My dad thought he was hurting me, came in and tased him in the leg. FML

by why / 08/17/2013 at 10:18am / United States (Tennessee) / Love

Today, I had to wake my mom up. While she was naked. On the toilet. FML

by 27161697 / 07/22/2013 at 12:45am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my husband received the "antique" samurai sword that he bought on Craigslist with $399.99 of our money. He only shared my outrage at the waste of money when he opened the package, only to find a toy sword along with a note saying, "HAHA, TROLLED." FML

by juliearis / 07/06/2013 at 3:45pm / United States (Connecticut) / Money

Today, after playing numerous games of poker against my friend, and him telling me that I'm the best poker player he's ever met, I went out and played for real money. I got totally destroyed, lost all of my money, and was laughed out of the building. FML

by goodbye sweet internet / 07/06/2013 at 2:23pm / Greece (Attiki) / Money

Today, my boyfriend and I went to my parents' barbecue. He knew my family is extremely religious, so what did he do? Called for silence to make an announcement, namely: "God isn't real." Cue a riot that ended in us being kicked out and me all but disowned for "putting him up to it". FML

by he's a dawk, and a cunt / 07/05/2013 at 6:29pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I went to my parents' barbecue. He knew my family is extremely religious, so what did he do? Called for silence to make an announcement, namely: "God isn't real." Cue a riot that ended in us being kicked out and me all but disowned for "putting him up to it". FML

by he's a dawk, and a cunt / 07/05/2013 at 6:29pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got home from work early and discovered why my 17-year-old daughter's sprained elbow isn't getting any better after weeks of treatment. She can't stop giving handjobs. FML

by Anonymous / 07/05/2013 at 10:26am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up from an extremely intense and pleasurable wet dream. This wouldn't have been bad, had it not been about Velveeta cheese. FML

by idk ask freud / 07/04/2013 at 12:11am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy