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Laney71

Offline (the 02/04/2016 at 10:49pm) | Search for a member

Laney71

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 20 April 1996 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2210
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Laney71's page activity

Visits<b>luke_sager</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 7:20pm<b>Attacksloth</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 9:08pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 4:10pm<b>JefferyLillie</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 3:51am<b>Murilirum</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 5:26am

Laney71's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

See all of Laney71's badges

Laney71's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out my fiancé is already married when his wife showed up at my door. That's about the same time she found her husband is gay, and that Ashley can be a man's name. FML

#21494790
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28024) - you deserved it (2604)

On 11/20/2015 at 9:43am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I watched porn on my phone for the first time and it went black and shut down. In reality my phone just died. But I thought for a few seconds the government found me out. Paranoia much. FML

#21475640
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19774) - you deserved it (7869)

On 10/03/2015 at 9:38am - misc - by xxx - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had yet another debilitating migraine that kept me awake. In the middle of the night, I heard an owl hooting. Thinking it was cool, I moved closer to the open window to hear better. After a few minutes, I realized it was actually my new neighbor having loud sex. My aunt moved in next door. FML

#21463837
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26103) - you deserved it (2102)

On 09/02/2015 at 5:52pm - intimacy - by Hooty (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I thought I'd locked my house keys in my locker at work. Not having any replacement nearby, I decided to cut the padlock with the saw of my pocket-knife. It took 20 minutes and four cuts into my hand to destroy the padlock. It took another five seconds to find the missing key in my jacket. FML

#21463029
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10914) - you deserved it (19908)

On 08/31/2015 at 4:01pm - misc - by Lockout (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)

Today, my brother said he was cleaning his room. When I walked in, he was giving my cousin a blowjob. FML

#21462259
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29823) - you deserved it (2774)

On 08/29/2015 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (West Virginia)

Today, at work, I served a customer who looked so much like my grandma that I thought it actually was her. Then I remembered she died 6 months ago. I had to serve customers with a smile on my face while choking back tears for the rest of the day. FML

#21461323
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26223) - you deserved it (1912)

On 08/27/2015 at 12:34pm - work - by myanmarkaviar (woman) - Norway (Buskerud)

Today, I shaved my pubes while staying at my senile grandma's place. I guess I didn't clean up properly, because she found some hair and insisted someone must have broken in while we were out and used the shower. I had to play along to spare myself embarrassment. FML

#21460529
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18921) - you deserved it (6667)

On 08/25/2015 at 1:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, my date came to pick me up for a date. As I was getting into his car, a large blister on my foot burst. My foot is now swimming in a pool of hot, liquid pus. FML

Today, while trying to lift a weight bar at the gym, I ended up cracking my rib cage and almost passed out. My friend, who was supposed to be spotting for me, couldn't help until the last second because he'd snuck off to flirt with a pair of guys halfway across the room. FML

#21459605
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21667) - you deserved it (5471)

On 08/23/2015 at 8:35am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, the professor I've had a crush on informed me that there's only one way left I could still pass his course. Thinking this was an attempt to flirt with me, I told him I'd do anything he could imagine. He then looked confused when he asked me to write an essay. FML

#21458908
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10616) - you deserved it (31422)

On 08/21/2015 at 3:43pm - misc - by notwhatithought (woman) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, I found out the girl I met online, who I spent hours talking to every day for the past 2 months, and who I fell in love with is actually my gay roomate. He says if I could fall in love with "her", I can fall in love with him. It doesn't work that way, dickhead. FML

#21457909
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28709) - you deserved it (4420)

On 08/19/2015 at 2:32am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, my laziness hit a new low when I tried closing my bedroom door using my mind. FML

#21446894
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11339) - you deserved it (19877)

On 07/25/2015 at 4:33am - misc - by elovan - United States (Iowa)

Today, I had to call a coworker to the office via the store intercom. The damn thing didn't turn off properly and everyone heard me say "I hate that asshole. Just be where your dumb ass should be." I realized my mistake a few seconds before my manager stormed in and threatened to fire me. FML

#21446728
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13518) - you deserved it (25200)

On 07/24/2015 at 8:59pm - work - by suspended (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I left my dog in my car for 5 minutes while I ran into a store. The car was running so he was fine, the thing that wasn't so fine is that when I walked out my car wasn't there. My dog somehow moved my car into the middle of a intersection, almost causing an accident. FML

#21430717
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21497) - you deserved it (18090)

On 06/23/2015 at 4:00pm - animals - by ej6901 - United States (New Jersey)



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