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Offline (the 09/26/2014 at 12:04am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2259
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Koalacatcher's page activity

Visits<b>shinklefly</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 11:15am<b>LaurenAshleigh97</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 9:52am<b>ForeverSilent101</b> - the 08/26/2013 at 10:36pm<b>Fmlano</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 4:32pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 10:48am<b>linds3y</b> - the 05/24/2013 at 12:58pm<b>happylappy</b> - the 05/23/2013 at 12:19pm<b>Ambient25</b> - the 05/12/2013 at 11:40am<b>DemonX</b> - the 05/11/2013 at 9:40pm<b>candy29</b> - the 05/11/2013 at 6:23pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/11/2013 at 4:16pm<b>TacoBelle</b> - the 05/10/2013 at 7:04pm<b>violetsweety</b> - the 05/10/2013 at 2:25pm<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 03/05/2013 at 11:01am<b>Domi2015</b> - the 03/02/2013 at 10:52am<b>pickles1994</b> - the 02/23/2013 at 12:33pm

Koalacatcher's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of Koalacatcher's badges

Koalacatcher's favorite FMLs

Today, I rushed to a dentist's appointment. Once in the chair, I apologized for not having had the time to brush my teeth beforehand. He responded with, "Ah that's alright, I just took a piss and forgot to wash my hands." FML

by Anonymous / 10/29/2013 at 2:57pm / Zimbabwe / Health

Today, I went to dinner with a guy I like and paid the $120 bill. After joking that he was an expensive date, he replied, "I laugh at how you think this is a date." FML

by Anonymous / 10/03/2013 at 4:14am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, I noticed that my new shampoo had an unfamiliar pink color to it. After some investigation, I found a dead mouse that had apparently cut itself on the bottle pump. I've been washing my hair with mouse blood. FML

by shampoomice / 08/07/2013 at 12:34pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to go to therapy for my fear of cats. All the way there, my girlfriend kept making cat noises and scratching at me. FML

by Anonymous / 06/26/2013 at 12:42pm / United States (Colorado) / Animals

Today, I let my step-father know exactly what I thought of him. After a few moments of awkward silence, he leaned towards me and quietly whispered, "Well you're adopted. Your parents never loved you." FML

by SkeetinKeaton / 06/05/2013 at 11:24am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend of two years, whom I supported through the death of his father, and whose invalid mother I also took care of, suddenly dumped me. The fact that I've put on a little weight due to recent stress disgusts him, and he "can't date a chubster". FML

Today, my brother tried to convince me to get a clitoris piercing at his recently opened piercing studio. FML

by Anonymous / 05/17/2013 at 12:40pm / Sweden (Varmlands Lan) / Intimacy

Today, while I was in the shower, I heard a door slam. Assuming it was my fiancé, I shouted "I love you!" I later opened the bathroom door to see my stereo and television missing. I'd said "I love you" to whoever robbed my apartment. FML

by ShowerGirl / 04/30/2013 at 3:54am / United States / Money

Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML

by Anon / 04/22/2013 at 3:19am / Singapore / Miscellaneous

Today, my grandmother tried to upstage me at my wedding by wearing an actual wedding dress because she "never had a real wedding". FML

by gamerguru13 / 04/21/2013 at 8:26am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I briefly left my laptop while I went to use the toilet. When I came back, I found "I" had posted on Facebook, calling my mom a "stupid cunt who should just stay in the kitchen." The only other person home at the time was my grandpa. She didn't believe it, and permanently grounded me. FML

by phonesmuggler / 04/18/2013 at 3:30pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I left my son with my husband while I went to the store. Ten minutes later, my dog was missing a large patch of fur, and neither of them can stop laughing. FML

by Anonymous / 04/17/2013 at 11:14am / United States / Kids

Today, I found an invisible ink pen. I drew on my arms, thinking nobody would see it. I had an allergic reaction to the ink, and I now have three very large, very visible, red penises on my forearm. FML

by maturity / 04/07/2013 at 8:30pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Health

Today, I walked in on my husband eating cat food out of the cat bowl dressed in a cat costume. FML

by confusedcatlover / 04/06/2013 at 7:42am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I carried flat-packed boxes home from work to move my things into a new apartment. Whilst walking down the street, the wind kept blowing and spinning me round. A crowd eventually gathered, mistaking me for a street performer. Nobody helped or even threw me any loose change. FML

by Gem / 04/05/2013 at 7:04am / United Kingdom (Nottingham) / Miscellaneous