Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Koalacatcher

Offline (the 09/26/2014 at 12:04am) | Search for a member

Koalacatcher

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 972
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Koalacatcher's page activity

Visits<b>LaurenAshleigh97</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 9:52am<b>ForeverSilent101</b> - the 08/26/2013 at 10:36pm<b>Fmlano</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 4:32pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 10:48am<b>linds3y</b> - the 05/24/2013 at 12:58pm<b>happylappy</b> - the 05/23/2013 at 12:19pm<b>Ambient25</b> - the 05/12/2013 at 11:40am<b>DemonX</b> - the 05/11/2013 at 9:40pm<b>candy29</b> - the 05/11/2013 at 6:23pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/11/2013 at 4:16pm<b>TacoBelle</b> - the 05/10/2013 at 7:04pm<b>violetsweety</b> - the 05/10/2013 at 2:25pm<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 03/05/2013 at 11:01am<b>Domi2015</b> - the 03/02/2013 at 10:52am<b>pickles1994</b> - the 02/23/2013 at 12:33pm

Koalacatcher's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of Koalacatcher's badges

Koalacatcher's favorite FMLs

Today, I rushed to a dentist's appointment. Once in the chair, I apologized for not having had the time to brush my teeth beforehand. He responded with, "Ah that's alright, I just took a piss and forgot to wash my hands." FML

#20937985
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45792) - you deserved it (12418)

On 10/29/2013 at 2:57pm - health - by Anonymous - Zimbabwe

Today, I went to dinner with a guy I like and paid the $120 bill. After joking that he was an expensive date, he replied, "I laugh at how you think this is a date." FML

#20905656
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49904) - you deserved it (5754)

On 10/03/2013 at 4:14am - love - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I noticed that my new shampoo had an unfamiliar pink color to it. After some investigation, I found a dead mouse that had apparently cut itself on the bottle pump. I've been washing my hair with mouse blood. FML

#20825465
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56111) - you deserved it (4915)

On 08/07/2013 at 12:34pm - misc - by shampoomice (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to go to therapy for my fear of cats. All the way there, my girlfriend kept making cat noises and scratching at me. FML

#20748338
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38836) - you deserved it (7569)

On 06/26/2013 at 12:42pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I let my step-father know exactly what I thought of him. After a few moments of awkward silence, he leaned towards me and quietly whispered, "Well you're adopted. Your parents never loved you." FML

#20707377
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53895) - you deserved it (13414)

On 06/05/2013 at 11:24am - misc - by SkeetinKeaton (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend of two years, whom I supported through the death of his father, and whose invalid mother I also took care of, suddenly dumped me. The fact that I've put on a little weight due to recent stress disgusts him, and he "can't date a chubster". FML

Today, my brother tried to convince me to get a clitoris piercing at his recently opened piercing studio. FML

#20668963
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59720) - you deserved it (6043)

On 05/17/2013 at 12:40pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Varmlands Lan)

Today, while I was in the shower, I heard a door slam. Assuming it was my fiancé, I shouted "I love you!" I later opened the bathroom door to see my stereo and television missing. I'd said "I love you" to whoever robbed my apartment. FML

#20632198
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52969) - you deserved it (5006)

On 04/30/2013 at 3:54am - money - by ShowerGirl (woman) - United States

Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML

#20612550
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32708) - you deserved it (111921)

On 04/22/2013 at 3:19am - misc - by Anon - Singapore

Today, my grandmother tried to upstage me at my wedding by wearing an actual wedding dress because she "never had a real wedding". FML

#20609675
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52946) - you deserved it (3868)

On 04/21/2013 at 8:26am - misc - by gamerguru13 - United States (New York)

Today, I briefly left my laptop while I went to use the toilet. When I came back, I found "I" had posted on Facebook, calling my mom a "stupid cunt who should just stay in the kitchen." The only other person home at the time was my grandpa. She didn't believe it, and permanently grounded me. FML

#20602422
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43416) - you deserved it (5224)

On 04/18/2013 at 3:30pm - misc - by phonesmuggler (man) - United States

Today, I left my son with my husband while I went to the store. Ten minutes later, my dog was missing a large patch of fur, and neither of them can stop laughing. FML

#20599149
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38856) - you deserved it (7457)

On 04/17/2013 at 11:14am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I found an invisible ink pen. I drew on my arms, thinking nobody would see it. I had an allergic reaction to the ink, and I now have three very large, very visible, red penises on my forearm. FML

#20579781
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14760) - you deserved it (57879)

On 04/07/2013 at 8:30pm - health - by maturity - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I walked in on my husband eating cat food out of the cat bowl dressed in a cat costume. FML

#20577178
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51227) - you deserved it (5646)

On 04/06/2013 at 7:42am - misc - by confusedcatlover (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I carried flat-packed boxes home from work to move my things into a new apartment. Whilst walking down the street, the wind kept blowing and spinning me round. A crowd eventually gathered, mistaking me for a street performer. Nobody helped or even threw me any loose change. FML

#20575849
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28404) - you deserved it (3317)

On 04/05/2013 at 7:04am - misc - by Gem - United Kingdom (Nottingham)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: