About Klug : I enjoy funny things and rock music.
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Klug's favorite FMLs
by brileyyyy / 01/11/2010 at 10:40pm / United States (Missouri) / Health
by wowhoopla / 01/10/2010 at 8:10pm / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to the DMV to renew my license. When I gave the woman behind the desk my name and social security number she looked confused. She then called over her manager, who did the same thing. Getting nervous, I asked what was wrong. Apparently according to the state of Illinois I'm dead. FML
by driver / 01/06/2010 at 9:55am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation
Today, my best friend was texting me about her sick dog. She wrote "Do you think she will get better?", so I wrote "I hope she does". It wasn't until later that I realized I accidentally wrote "I hope she dies" instead. FML
by poordog / 01/04/2010 at 10:32pm / United States (Virginia) / Animals
Today, I texted a somewhat overweight girl I wanted to hook up with and asked her "Have you been dating anyone lately?" Unfortunately with predictive text, "dating" came out as "eating". I didn't realize it till after it sent. FML
by Proof-Reader / 12/15/2009 at 3:32am / United States (California) / Love
by Painful / 10/05/2009 at 12:16am / United States (Minnesota) / Health
Today, I was with my mom and my boyfriend at lunch. My phone rings and my mom excitedly says "You have friends!" As I'm about to answer it, she pulls out her phone from under the table and says "Kidding, it's just me." My boyfriend starts cracking up, and they exchange a high five. FML
by NoFriends / 08/02/2009 at 1:12pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of 3 years. I got reservations for a romantic dinner, and at the end, fireworks would spell out my proposal. The whole thing had taken weeks to plan out and had cost me a lot of money. She proposed to me at a subway station first. FML
by Anonymous / 07/07/2009 at 7:04pm / United States (California) / Love
by shandrith / 07/03/2009 at 10:16am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was telling my mother about my earrings hurting my ears. I had a cut on my ear close to the piercing and she thought that I had mistaken the cut for the opening, and said (as we walked past a car full of men), "Well of course it hurts when you put it in the wrong hole!". FML
by Anonymous / 05/18/2009 at 8:40am / United Kingdom (Belfast) / Intimacy
by lolzor / 03/12/2009 at 8:07am / Australia (Queensland) / Health
Today, I was eating lunch naked at my home watching porn on the big screen. I heard the garage door opening meaning my roommate was coming home. In my haste to get dressed, I fell back in the barstool I was sitting in and knocked myself out. I woke up still naked and with lettuce all over me. FML
by HansonLUVR / 03/11/2009 at 8:26pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
Today, I woke up at 5:30 AM to my boyfriend flipping on the lights and shouting, "We have a problem!" Our chinchilla had gotten out of his maximum security cage, and half of our apartment is now underwater because he decided the water line that leads to the fridge would make a tasty midnight snack. FML
by Sara / 03/04/2009 at 5:42pm / United States (Washington) / Animals
by GavinHosler / 01/29/2009 at 4:44pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy
- Today, I was flirting via text with a coworker. Things started getting heated, and I wanted to send… Today, I came to the realization I make a living trimming the hair off dogs' privates. I've touched… Today, well actually last night, I did a full striptease for my girlfriend to "You can leave your…