Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Offline (the 08/30/2015 at 12:01pm) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2207
  • Number of comments : 28
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 11 posted

About Kinoster : I live Dublin, I am addicted to rugby. I am from Berlin.

Kinoster's page activity

Visits<b>Skyzeri</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 2:25am<b>paintedchocolate</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 1:35pm<b>Tomfire9</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 10:51pm<b>54MU31</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 1:17am<b>CarlosDanger</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 12:38pm<b>tuckit</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 9:43pm<b>Jiplo</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 11:44pm<b>sgtcOOki3</b> - the 11/14/2013 at 12:34am<b>yulong730</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 11:07pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 09/01/2013 at 10:09pm<b>vespergreen</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 11:27am<b>semper_amo</b> - the 06/19/2013 at 12:51am<b>dead_insects</b> - the 06/01/2013 at 9:09pm<b>phoneYuNOlisten</b> - the 05/28/2013 at 7:10pm<b>gqsammie</b> - the 05/13/2013 at 10:35am<b>Maverick52</b> - the 03/26/2013 at 12:51pm<b>Nsswimmer</b> - the 03/06/2013 at 9:18pm<b>baba01</b> - the 01/29/2013 at 9:50pm

Kinoster's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Kinoster's badges

Kinoster's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in the bathroom defecating when I felt something hanging there. I reached back with toilet paper and starting pulling it out inch by inch; 3 feet later I learned I had a tapeworm. Worst of all, no pharmacy has the med the doctor prescribed. I have to live with this thing until the med gets here. FML


I agree, your life sucks (65833) - you deserved it (3871)

On 09/15/2009 at 5:14pm - intimacy - by benander (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was walking with my very attractive friend who I like a lot. She then told me that her roomate wouldn't be home tonight, and if I wanted, I could come over and study history. I didn't get it. I told her no thanks, that I was covered, and it was chem I needed to study. An hour later, I understood. FML


I agree, your life sucks (14317) - you deserved it (73240)

On 09/10/2009 at 7:17pm - love - by itisthedude (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was awakened by the sound of chain-saws. Moments later a tree branch came through my roof. FML


I agree, your life sucks (45694) - you deserved it (2050)

On 09/04/2009 at 12:46pm - misc - by 1ndustrytx (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found one of those online color blindness tests where you have to distinguish a colored number from the pattern. Not being able to, I spent hundreds of dollars on medical tests to discover that the pattern online was a joke. FML


I agree, your life sucks (13433) - you deserved it (68317)

On 07/05/2009 at 5:49pm - misc - by colorblind (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML


I agree, your life sucks (378607) - you deserved it (43321)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by creepermagnet (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I signed up for an online dating site. After completing their personality quiz, I set the distance to a 60 mile radius of where I live. Then to the country. Then to the whole world. I got no matches for any of the settings. FML


I agree, your life sucks (121171) - you deserved it (16284)

On 03/23/2009 at 4:38pm - love - by Rajin (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my parents were out so I invited my girlfriend over. It was the afternoon, and things started to heat up. We were having sex, and I was about to finish. Then I looked through the window, to see a construction worker (who was fixing the house next to mine) giving me a thumbs up. He's her dad. FML


I agree, your life sucks (187601) - you deserved it (32998)

On 03/22/2009 at 9:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Malta

Today, I found FML for the first time in class, and literally laughed out loud in the middle of the lecture in front of 200 classmates. Today's lecture? The cruelties of slavery. FML


I agree, your life sucks (32013) - you deserved it (30569)

On 02/03/2009 at 5:55pm - work - by kprice6 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I tried to suck my own penis. Autofellatio. My mother walked in on me and I flipped backwards off the bed. ER and 10 stiches above my eyebrow later, I asked her not to ever bring it up again. FML


I agree, your life sucks (17366) - you deserved it (72252)

On 01/26/2009 at 4:09pm - intimacy - by Boredom - United States

G.E. Gallas's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • G.E. Gallas's illustrated FML
  • Hardcore will never die, but you will. We’re back with some rock n roll, or dare I say it, some punk rock. Don't run away, it's not that terrible stuff that emo kids listen to while slashing their…

Friday 2 October 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: