About Kidkaplan : Hello there, not much to say. If you want to know something, message me! I love meeting new people! I LOVE ThePaperDragon!!!
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Today, while going on a jog through the countryside, I discovered that it is actually possible outside of crappy TV shows to have a rifle leveled at you, and to be shouted at to, "Get off my land." FML
I agree, your life sucks (15624) - you deserved it (11897)
On 12/30/2012 at 6:48pm - misc - by fuckinghicks (man) - United States
Today, I returned to Germany for a break from my studies abroad. I got lost while out for groceries, so I tried asking a guy for directions. I went totally blank and strained to think of the right words, prompting him to mutter about rude foreigners not bothering to learn the local language. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18488) - you deserved it (4289)
On 12/30/2012 at 2:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Saarland)
Today, I went to church for the first time in my life. They had a Jesus statue at the altar, and I noticed he was surprisingly muscular. Ten minutes later, I had to excuse myself, after I caught myself fantasizing over a crucified Jesus. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7842) - you deserved it (23923)
On 12/30/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by Weirdo (woman) - United States
Today, a stranger was kind enough to plow my driveway during a blizzard. However, they were not kind enough to leave their number after plowing the front end of my car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21722) - you deserved it (1585)
On 12/30/2012 at 2:32am - misc - by imcold - United States
Today, I jokingly asked my boyfriend if he was cheating on me. He replied, "Nah, all the chicks in this town are fuck-ugly." and stared at me until I left the room. Good to know that's his only reason for staying faithful. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21982) - you deserved it (5144)
On 12/29/2012 at 6:54pm - love - by single once again (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)
Today, I checked my sister's diary, because I was worried about her recent angry and withdrawn behavior. She caught me in the act, and my mom, whom I've caught blatantly snooping through my stuff multiple times now, grounded me for my "disgusting" violation of my sister's privacy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12314) - you deserved it (22438)
On 12/29/2012 at 6:17pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I auditioned for a role in ballet. My stomach was in pain and as I ran to be lifted into the air by my partner, I let out a huge fart. The auditorium was dead silent. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30838) - you deserved it (2879)
On 12/29/2012 at 4:32am - misc - by gassy - United States (Washington)
Today, I was texting my mother after my boyfriend broke off our relationship. She offered incredibly supportive replies such as "No, really?" and "Aww, that sucks." before apparently getting bored and claiming she had to go because her "text reception" was breaking up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19909) - you deserved it (3023)
On 12/27/2012 at 6:20pm - love - by youfuckingdumbassmum (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)
Today, while trying to take my Christmas tree down, I learned that at some point during the last few weeks, it became home to a colony of green ants. I'm now covered in bites and terrified to go anywhere near it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19732) - you deserved it (1731)
On 12/27/2012 at 5:54pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia
Today, I woke up from an explicit dream involving my dentist. I'm scheduled for a conscious sedation appointment with him in two hours and I'm terrified of what I might say or do while I'm under. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22029) - you deserved it (2145)
On 12/26/2012 at 9:05am - health - by ugh - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was diagnosed with pneumonia. My breathing is short and heavy, and I wanted my boyfriend to comfort me. Instead, he called me Darth Vader, patted me on the head, and said, "Don't worry, the Force will be with you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (16120) - you deserved it (2696)
On 12/05/2012 at 12:55pm - health - by Emily - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11769) - you deserved it (21481)
On 11/08/2012 at 1:25pm - intimacy - by shit.... (man) - Malaysia (Selangor)
Today, I came home to find an almost completely devoured cheesecake, The Notebook playing on the TV, and a shoe thrown at my head. It's safe to say my girlfriend is just about on her period. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20933) - you deserved it (4129)
On 10/22/2012 at 3:08pm - misc - by jesushelpme (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, it's my best friend's birthday. It's also the first year I've had her gift purchased, wrapped and mailed on time. The post office lost the parcel. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14011) - you deserved it (1001)
On 09/29/2012 at 11:49pm - misc - by carine13 - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my laptop got hit by a Trojan. Not the malware, but a used condom thrown from a car driving past as I sat on a street bench. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23415) - you deserved it (1469)
On 09/28/2012 at 4:24am - intimacy - by iNearlyHurled - United States
Friday 24 May 2013
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