About Ketchup_Castle : *
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, I learned explosive diarrhea is real. I felt it coming and dashed into our supermarket. 10 feet in, liquid poo started spewing down my pants legs. 150 feet to go. I ran. It ran. They watched. After 15 minutes of cleaning, I slunk out. Now, I have to find a new market, maybe a new town. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31855) - you deserved it (2160)
On 11/24/2009 at 6:44am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)
Today, a friend convinced me that I should throw a big party and invite everyone to come. After fixing a ton of party food, I sat around and waited for my guests to arrive. No one did. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25334) - you deserved it (2312)
On 11/21/2009 at 3:09pm - misc - by tealsoda (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, a old lady on the street told me that I should be wearing a bra because my nipples were visible under my white tee. I am a 37 year old man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16548) - you deserved it (559)
On 11/19/2009 at 7:41pm - health - by Mondo (man) - United States (California)
Today, my condo board refused to lift the new policy requiring pet owners to carry dogs in common areas because someone's dog is peeing in the hall. I can't physically carry my two dogs, so I'm now forced to wheel them through the building in a borrowed baby stroller. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22306) - you deserved it (2632)
On 11/18/2009 at 4:50am - animals - by Slivered - Canada (Ontario)
Today, after I have spent $3,000 dollars in preparations to move in with my girlfriend of 2 and 1/2 years, she confesses she's a mental patient who stole someone elses identity. She was telling the truth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29695) - you deserved it (2302)
On 10/13/2009 at 2:38am - misc - by IMayBeAFool (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, at work, my stomach hurt and I passed gas for relief. Moments later, I discovered that my loose, silent "fart" was actually a wet, sneaky shart. The mess was beyond repair; I had to fake a family emergency and crept out of the office so that my coworkers wouldn't see my obvious crap stain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25827) - you deserved it (6308)
On 10/12/2009 at 2:10pm - health - by Few_Absolutes (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I was at the Salvation Army when I saw a wheelchair in the miscellaneous aisle. I thought it would be fun to ride around in it. As I was wheeling it back to where I found it, I made it back just as it's owner was hobbling out of the dressing room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5053) - you deserved it (34531)
On 10/07/2009 at 1:58pm - misc - by imok (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I went shopping for a new pair of jeans. I was feeling good about the fact that I was going down a waist size until the cashier decided to discuss with me, three co-workers, and the ten other people in line how she didn't even know jeans came in sizes that big. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29696) - you deserved it (5533)
On 10/06/2009 at 9:11pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I fainted on the sidewalk. When I woke up, I was still lying on the sidewalk, people were stepping over me and my purse was gone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49952) - you deserved it (2482)
On 10/06/2009 at 1:25am - misc - by blackedout (woman) - Singapore
Today, I saw photos of my boyfriend at his 25th birthday party. The one he told me was cancelled. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35069) - you deserved it (2222)
On 10/05/2009 at 9:55am - love - by Konstantine (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, I drove my cousin to her wedding. The photographer said I was too ugly for the official photos so they searched the crowd for a good looking guy to pose as the driver in my new car. No one in the crowd stopped to defend me. My mom told me it's my own fault. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41329) - you deserved it (3217)
On 10/04/2009 at 2:13pm - misc - by CapeRanger (man) - South Africa (Limpopo)
Today, I realized that 6 months ago I signed up for a 3 day trial for a porn website that turns into a $30 membership after 3 days. I completely forgot the day after and never viewed it. I've spent $180 so far. And I can't remember my password. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6596) - you deserved it (53121)
On 09/30/2009 at 9:22pm - money - by GetMoney (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, after months of enduring my neighbors relentlessly yapping schnauzer, Molly, I moved into a new building. I was greeted by my new neighbor and her yapping rat terrier, Molly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31570) - you deserved it (2678)
On 09/22/2009 at 2:10pm - misc - by bellaellaella (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I went to the orthodontist to have my braces worked on. I accidentally swallowed some of the cleaning solution she used. She told me it would probably give me an upset stomach. Apparently, an upset stomach and crapping your pants means the same thing to an orthodontist. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28377) - you deserved it (2818)
On 09/17/2009 at 1:10am - health - by navyma - Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)
Today, I was first in line at a stoplight. After five minutes, with a line of cars behind me, the light was still red. People behind me started honking, so I decided to just go. Halfway across the way, I was greeted by a camera flash. Nobody else went. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9160) - you deserved it (36684)
On 09/15/2009 at 8:16am - misc - by publicenemy (man) - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
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