About Ketchup_Castle : *
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, I was taking a dump in a porta-potty at a fair. I had the runs really bad. All I have to say is that it's tough to take a shit that seems never-ending while other people outside are bitching at you and hammering on the flimsy door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25946) - you deserved it (2590)
On 04/27/2011 at 6:50am - health - by c.m.g. -
Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42193) - you deserved it (4476)
On 04/25/2011 at 5:39pm - misc - by Mike -
Today, my roommate told me there is some restricted number that keeps calling and waking her up at odd hours of the night. She then says she's getting the police involved to find out who it is because she feels "harassed". I'm the restricted caller calling to wake her up from snoring so loud. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12320) - you deserved it (24237)
On 04/14/2011 at 12:37am - misc - by wowimscrewed (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, feeling social, I went to a bar. During a trip to the dimly lit restroom, I fixed my makeup, and carefully penciling my sparse eyebrows. After an evening of meeting new people, I went home. In my well-lighted restroom, I discovered that my eyebrow pencil was actually my bright red lip liner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14995) - you deserved it (21703)
On 04/09/2011 at 3:52am - misc - by 2classicNot2 (woman) - United States (Hawaii)
Today, I had diarrhea in a public bathroom. When I was finished, I noticed that someone had pissed all over the toilet paper. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35831) - you deserved it (3268)
On 04/04/2011 at 1:26am - health - by Anonymous -
Today, my girlfriend asked me to hold her purse while shopping. All of a sudden, a robber punched me in the face and took her purse. She started crying about her purse and told me to get off the ground because I was embarrassing her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29481) - you deserved it (7574)
On 03/14/2011 at 10:44am - misc - by alex - United States
Today, my girlfriend haltingly dumped me over the phone. Faint splashes punctuated her grunting, straining sounds. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27550) - you deserved it (2787)
On 03/10/2011 at 4:42pm - love - by dumped (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I got a call from my daughter's school. Apparently, she was learning about the food pyramid and when she was asked to identify what she had eaten the day before, she said "dog food". FML
I agree, your life sucks (22542) - you deserved it (3299)
On 02/25/2011 at 1:44pm - kids - by Ldp56 (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I cleaned up my dog's crap after my wife asked me. 5 minutes later she yelled at me for being lazy as she slammed the door leaving for work. My dog shit in the exact same spot apparently to make me look stupid. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27097) - you deserved it (2441)
On 02/12/2011 at 9:17pm - animals - by Username - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I was running late for school because I had a huge stomach ache. To save on time, I took a taxi. When the taxi driver hit a bump, I lost control of my bowels and shit myself. Not only do I have to wash my underwear in the sink at school now, but I had to pay the driver extra to remove the smell from his car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20626) - you deserved it (3846)
On 01/27/2011 at 12:40pm - misc - by Username - Romania (Ilfov)
Today, it's the 3 month anniversary marking the day two friends and I shaved our heads as a show of solidarity for a friend starting chemo. Her prognosis is good and her hair only thinned slightly. We, on the other hand, look like a motley crew of lesbian biker chicks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19423) - you deserved it (7461)
On 01/15/2011 at 2:09am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I used the restrooms at the shopping mall. The cleaning lady stepped in after me, immediately turned around and very demonstratively started spraying air freshener. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15029) - you deserved it (4537)
On 12/24/2010 at 5:52am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands
Today, the elevator got stuck in between floor 4 and 5 at my doctors office. I had been having violent diarrhea. It was the reason I was at the doctor. Elevator was stuck for 35 minutes. During that time, I diarrhea'd in my pants twice. There were seven other people in the elevator. FML
I agree, your life sucks (82695) - you deserved it (3840)
On 12/13/2010 at 4:16am - health - by Christopher - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via facebook. I don't even have a facebook. My friends had to tell me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27916) - you deserved it (2270)
On 12/11/2010 at 12:05am - love - by itsover (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my boss sent me to a meeting with a client I've never met to do some damage control and renegotiate his contract. For two hours, he alternated between threatening to sue us, and making vulgar comments about raping me in his office. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28134) - you deserved it (2055)
On 11/24/2010 at 2:34pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Monday 20 May 2013
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