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Keno

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Keno

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  • Number of visits : 3721
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Keno's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:24pm<b>hopiee</b> - the 05/03/2009 at 6:09pm

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Keno's favorite FMLs

TODAY, I WAS GOING 73 IN A 55 ON A COUNTRY ROADHEN AN ONCOMING COP PASSD ME . HE PULLD A U TURN . I TURND OFF THE MAIN ROAD AND TOOK RANDOM TURNS . I GOT LOST, WAS 30 MINUTES LATE TO WORK, AND THE COP STILL FOUND ME AND GAVE ME TWO TICKETS . I HAD TO ASK HIM FIR DIRECTIONS . FML

#1021876
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10732) - you deserved it (89151)

On 04/16/2009 at 2:52pm - work - by TheBRADLeyB (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I called te campus police ( anonymously ) wile ma roommate was away and told tem about er weed stas because I was tred of er smoking in our room all te time . Se ad brougt er weed to a friend's and got off scot-free . I ave a earing Monday for te adderall tey found in ma desk . FML

#1021552
394 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25089) - you deserved it (120969)

On 04/16/2009 at 2:43pm - misc - by hatetheroommate (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, Family And I Ran Into An Older Man Parents Knew. He Continually Askd Me Questions Lyk Do You Play Football, Have You Startd Shaving Yet, Etc. I Thought He Was Joking. He Told Parents I Had Grown Into Quite A Young Man. I Am A Grl And He Wasn't Joking. FML

#1019315
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71242) - you deserved it (4438)

On 04/16/2009 at 12:53pm - misc - by yellow_sunflowers101 (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I canged te locks on ma apartment so ma crazy ex grlfriend couldn't get in. I went to er ouse to return er ouse key. I accidentally gave er te key to ma new locks, an can't find er old ouse key. Now I need er to come let me in to ma own ouse. FML

#1017007
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19822) - you deserved it (53646)

On 04/16/2009 at 10:47am - misc - by xnickx (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today... I went to a bar with two guys I was interested in. The frst I'd been trying to go out with all semester. The second I had gone to dinner with and he seemed nice. I was the designated driver. They drank too much and... on the way home... hooked up in the back seat. FML

#1014149
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (99183) - you deserved it (15077)

On 04/16/2009 at 4:40am - intimacy - by sad_gay (man) - United States (California)

Today, I Was Horsing Around After Mah Big Test. Someone Punched Me Softly On Mah Back. Figuring It Was Mah Friend, I Turned Around And Did A Roundhouse Kick. It Was Mah Girlfriend. FML

#1012847
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13125) - you deserved it (74597)

On 04/16/2009 at 2:47am - misc - by filipinoclari808 (man) - United States (Hawaii)

Today , I went shopping with my friend!! The store was having a special where if u spend over $75 u recieve a free T-shrt!! I paid 4 my items an my total was over $75!! The salesman didn't hand me a shrt so I askd him 4 one!! He looks at me an says "I'm sorry , we only have Mediums." FML

#1008885
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55362) - you deserved it (6723)

On 04/16/2009 at 12:11am - misc - by arrogantlondon (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I sent a cover letter to a potential employer. In the letter, I talked about my great attention to detail, my strong ability to focus, and my stellar writing skills. After hitting send, I reread the letter and noticed that I typed my name "B-R-A-I-N." My name is Brian. FML

#1008813
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14697) - you deserved it (51802)

On 04/16/2009 at 12:09am - work - by jusfonzin (man) - United States (New York)

TODAY, I DECIDED TO SNACK ON SOME MANDM'S. I SAW MAH DOG SNIFFING SOMETHING AND REALIZED ONE OF MAH MANDM'S HAD FALLEN ON THE FLOOR. TO PREVENT MAH DOG FROM EATING THE CHOCOLATE, I HURRIEDLY SNATCHED THE MANDM OFF THE GROUND AND ATE IT. WHEN I BIT DOWN, I REALIZED IT WASN'T AN MANDM. IT WAS A DEAD BEETLE. REAL FML

#1003972
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31856) - you deserved it (55014)

On 04/15/2009 at 9:22pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

TODAY , I HAD DINNER WITH THE GIRL I THOUGHT I WOULD END UP MARRYING. EVERYTHING WAS GOING WELL AND AFTER I HAD PAID THE BILL , SHE SAID SHE WAS A LESBIAN. JUST WHEN I THOUGHT IT COULDN'T GET ANY WORSE , SHE CHALLENGED ME TO SEE WHO COULD HOOK UP WITH A STRAIGHT GIRL FIRST. I LOST. FML

#1002619
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79848) - you deserved it (6578)

On 04/15/2009 at 8:13pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Utah)

today I was struggling through an exam and the hot girl next to me seemd to be flying through the questions . So I cheatd off her . When we finishd I askd her to lunch . She said ( No, I just rushd through the exam so I can go fuck mah boyfriend . ) I got shutdown and probably faild an exam . FML

#1001341
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10120) - you deserved it (86580)

On 04/15/2009 at 7:30pm - misc - by ananomoose - United States (Vermont)

Today, I was wearing a new 500 dollar dress on a crowdd train. I lookd great an I could feel the eyes on me. A cute guy then offerd me his seat, only boosting mah confidence more until he said ( for you an the baby, ) pointing at a bump in mah dress. I'm pregnant an wastd 500 dollars. FML

#994707
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51713) - you deserved it (26725)

On 04/15/2009 at 4:14pm - misc - by notpreggers - United Kingdom (London)

TODAY, I WOKE UP ON MOM'S COUCH WITH A WICKED HANGOVER . I MADE A MAD DASH 4 THE TOILET BUT FELT THE WAVE COMING AFTER TWO STEPS . I GRABBED A BAG OF TRASH NEXT TO THE FRONT DOOR AND SHOWED IT NO MERCY . AFTER I'D RECOVERED AND CLEANED UP, MOM ASKED IF I'D SEEN THE BAG WITH HER TAX MATERIALS . FML

#993995
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20205) - you deserved it (61758)

On 04/15/2009 at 3:47pm - health - by caramelkarma (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was visiting grandmother's house. She keeps the thermostat on 85 an after about 30 minute I explaind to her ( I'm going to looool have to leave, it's just too hot in here ). She replid: ( You think it's hot in here, wait until you get to hell. ) I laughd. She didn't. FML

#993932
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60947) - you deserved it (5739)

On 04/15/2009 at 3:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today , I Finally Hooked Up With A Guy I've Been Hanging Out With Fir 2 Months!! Afterwards,hile We're Getting Dressed He Says "You Better Be Clean!! If You're Not Tell Me Now So I Dont Pass It On To My Grlfriend." Stunned , All I Could Say Was , "Grlfriend?!" His Reply , "Well Technically My Fiancée." FML

#992330
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72452) - you deserved it (13038)

On 04/15/2009 at 2:42pm - misc - by oops123 - United States (Missouri)



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