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KaroKariert's FML badges
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KaroKariert's favorite FMLs
by catlady1989 / 05/10/2009 at 3:01pm / United States (Washington) / Animals
Today, my mom and I went to Winn-Dixie. I told her I was going to a different isle 5 minutes later I hear my name on the intercom to go to the front of the store. As I go I see my mom crying, she comes and hugs me and tells me she thought I was lost. Im 22, I had my cell phone, and I drove there. FML
by SwimSquid / 04/15/2009 at 2:38pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was walking down the street and I saw my brother on the other side of the road. He lives overseas and always told me he would visit when I least expected it. When I saw him, I got so excited I jumped on his back, screaming his name. It wasn't my brother. FML
by getslostinherownhouse / 04/14/2009 at 3:12pm / Spain (Madrid) / Miscellaneous
Today, I took my dog for a walk down by the river. I was throwing sticks for him with one hand and talking on the phone with the other. Then I accidentally threw my phone in the river instead of the stick and was standing there talking to the stick while my phone sat at the bottom of the river. FML
by El Boz / 02/22/2009 at 9:52am / United States (Maryland) / Animals
by shorty / 02/13/2009 at 2:18pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was volunteering at a nursing home calling bingo numbers. One woman stood up and started making noises, so I assumed she had won and started clapping. She then fell on the floor and died of a heart attack. I essentially applauded her death. FML
by janedoe / 02/12/2009 at 5:21pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work
Today, I was quietly having a bath when I felt something fall onto my shoulder blade. I glanced over my shoulder and saw what I thought were huge black spider legs. I screamed, completely hysterical, and I threw myself violently against a wall. It was my hair. FML
by noname / 12/26/2008 at 11:07pm / Miscellaneous
- Today, my boyfriend tried to make me wear a fake mustache during sex. He said "It turns him on." FML Today, I was sitting on the bus when a good looking girl accidentally brushed her ass up against my… Today, one of my boyfriend's friends commented on how small my boobs are. My boyfriend defended me,…