Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Justine94_x

Online | Search for a member

Justine94_x

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 13 October 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3829
  • Number of comments : 92
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Justine94_x : Hi.

Justine94_x's page activity

Visits<b>Decepticus</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 4:04am<b>Tr33Cat</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 1:12am<b>Firewielder</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 10:14pm<b>dimerneckel</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 8:36am<b>ButterflyHaze</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 8:00pm<b>weraru</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 11:20pm<b>tzemmy</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 11:12pm<b>3051628</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 12:25am<b>Jenra</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 8:36pm<b>Effulgence</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 11:50pm<b>rabbi1010</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 3:01am<b>assm1234</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 12:29pm<b>gjikvtj</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 7:55am<b>goldengirlsfan</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 7:34am<b>Bilbo_Swaggins</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 10:24pm<b>Dance2516</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 10:51am<b>jonathanedwards</b> - the 02/08/2014 at 6:46pm<b>LuluRichards</b> - the 01/05/2014 at 5:10pm

Justine94_x's FML badges

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Justine94_x's badges

Justine94_x's favorite FMLs

Today, my tonsils swelled to roughly the size of golf balls. My mom refuses to take me to the hospital because she's convinced I got it from kissing someone, and until I "fess up", she's not budging. FML

#17109448
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35174) - you deserved it (2728)

On 07/14/2011 at 4:21pm - health - by Eden - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while at my job at a Christian summer camp, I overheard one of the kids swearing. I politely said, "Please, only speak as Jesus would." He paused for a moment and replied, "Go to hell." FML

#17109395
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18960) - you deserved it (45927)

On 07/14/2011 at 4:14pm - work - by sbutler (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was walking down the street to go to the movies, when I got punched in the back of the head. When I turned around, a stranger said, "HAHA! It's punch a random person day!" When I asked him why he chose me, he replied "You're ugly." FML

#17080145
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36546) - you deserved it (4444)

On 07/12/2011 at 12:46pm - misc - by ManInPain (man) - United States

Today, my drunk father chased me down the street with my little brother's light saber screaming, "Come back Yoda! Teach me how to use the force!" FML

#17023204
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36060) - you deserved it (4351)

On 07/08/2011 at 1:23am - misc - by Yoda (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I met my boyfriend's sophisticated grandparents. I politely introduced myself. The first words to come out of his granny's mouth were, "If something happens to him, you won't get a f*cking cent of the insurance money, you hear?" FML

#17019380
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34579) - you deserved it (2749)

On 07/07/2011 at 8:58pm - love - by Jessica - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, a business man in his forties tackled me to the ground in an attempt to take my seat on a crowded train. When that didn't work, he called me a fat bitch and gave me the finger. The seat was given up for me because I'm seven months pregnant. FML

#17017856
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53316) - you deserved it (3100)

On 07/07/2011 at 6:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I was so hungover, I started yelling at inanimate objects. My mom walked in on me calling my cereal a "worthless piece of shit sent from the bowels of Hell." FML

#16950938
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10244) - you deserved it (43135)

On 07/02/2011 at 4:54pm - misc - by Cowgirl_Up37 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was so hungover, I started yelling at inanimate objects. My mom walked in on me calling my cereal a "worthless piece of shit sent from the bowels of Hell." FML

#16950938
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10244) - you deserved it (43135)

On 07/02/2011 at 4:54pm - misc - by Cowgirl_Up37 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my five year old daughter came up to me and told me she wanted to be a nun. When I asked why, she replied, "So I won't get my heart broken by a boy." FML

#16607799
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36290) - you deserved it (7130)

On 06/11/2011 at 7:12am - kids - by julia - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was at the park with my daughter. She walked up to a boy at the swings, held her hand out, and said, "Hi I'm Vanessa, and someday you'll be working for me." FML

#16591956
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31327) - you deserved it (12104)

On 06/10/2011 at 5:57am - kids - by Rachel (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I saw a woman run down my street screaming, "Fuck you cops! I can drive under the influence if I want to!" It took me a second to realize it was my mother. FML

#16474078
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44159) - you deserved it (3126)

On 06/02/2011 at 9:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my daughter turned 18. She decided to use this day to tell me everywhere her and her boyfriends have had sex in my house to get revenge for being overprotective. FML

#16451971
333 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21659) - you deserved it (57562)

On 06/01/2011 at 2:06pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I finally convinced my girlfriend to let me give her a foot massage after she had a long day at work. Halfway through, she fell asleep. Wanting to see how ticklish she actually was, I started to tickle her feet. She then kicked me straight in the nuts whilst sleeping. FML

Today, I went on a blind date at a fancy restaurant. My date was running a bit late, so I went ahead and got a table. I got bored, so I decided to ask my waiter how I looked. He stood there, then said that "it's against company policy to mock customers to their face." FML

#16326196
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35629) - you deserved it (7561)

On 05/24/2011 at 9:59am - misc - by BurnedByAWaiter -

Today, I had a parent-teacher conference with my 8 year old son. He'd written "Chuck Norris" as the answer for every question on his test. FML

#16217085
441 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37809) - you deserved it (10282)

On 05/17/2011 at 12:54am - kids - by yobruh -



Emily Chan's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Emily Chan's Illustrated FML
  • This week, we landed a spacecraft on a comet. Not FML, though. You've got to admit that the human brain is quite amazing when it comes to resources, creativity and inventing new ways to push things forward. On…

Friday 14 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: