JustMeMyselfI

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JustMeMyselfI

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3291
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About JustMeMyselfI : yea ima crazy mudda fudda, some say a freq... they all look in amaze when i speak.

JustMeMyselfI's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:58pm<b>Lorysa</b> - the 05/08/2011 at 8:16pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 12:39am<b>GearHead94</b> - the 09/28/2010 at 1:52pm<b>thebeast2423</b> - the 08/11/2010 at 2:26am<b>romskiies</b> - the 07/05/2010 at 1:29pm<b>tiffyxmac</b> - the 07/04/2010 at 5:56pm<b>illmatic2</b> - the 07/03/2010 at 11:23pm<b>Football_5tar_JR</b> - the 07/02/2010 at 3:07pm<b>2igutierrez31</b> - the 06/30/2010 at 3:16am<b>libby_a</b> - the 06/29/2010 at 6:03pm<b>ZombiezEatU</b> - the 06/22/2010 at 3:59am<b>ryanbsblstar17</b> - the 06/21/2010 at 10:49pm<b>Cuervo23</b> - the 06/20/2010 at 11:36pm<b>nerdsgetmehot</b> - the 06/19/2010 at 4:45pm<b>Chaith</b> - the 06/18/2010 at 10:08pm<b>cristinaa_</b> - the 06/15/2010 at 1:30pm<b>fisheatsbear</b> - the 06/13/2010 at 3:47am

JustMeMyselfI's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

JustMeMyselfI's favorite FMLs

Today, while talking online with my boyfriend, the conversation turns sexual. He stops responding but I continue with the conversation. Then I get a response: "this is his sister. He fell asleep and I need the computer. I'll tell him you said goodnight, but not that other stuff". FML

by Anonymous / 09/15/2009 at 12:44am / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy

Today, my husband and I were in bed, and just as I was about to finish he screamed, "Oh shit! It's 4:15, my strawberries are gonna whither!!!!" and then jumped off me and went to check on his farm on FarmVille. An imaginary farm, on Facebook. FML

by demk / 08/20/2009 at 10:51am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, my coworker came over to my desk and told me that I should protect my Twitter updates, because I had unknowingly made them public. My tweets include drinking stories, all the men I've hooked up with, various cuss words, sexual innuendos, and how much I hate my coworkers. FML

by Anonymous / 07/06/2009 at 6:36pm / United States (Virginia) / Work

Today, I went onto my band's MySpace just to check if we had any new comments or anything like that and I noticed that I was listed as a past member. Nobody ever told me I was replaced. FML

by BassGuy / 05/18/2009 at 1:05pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had organised to go for an all day fishing trip, but had forgotten to book a day off. I called my boss and told him that I had to stay with my mum in hospital after a car crash that she had last night. He called me a liar and fired me. Turns out my mum is having an affair with my boss. FML

by Anonymous / 05/17/2009 at 7:32am / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Work

Today, I was eating at a restaurant patio with a few friends. After the waitress cleaned up our table there was a drop of mayonnaise on the table. I wiped it with my finger and licked it. It wasn’t mayo, it was bird shit. FML

by MJ3105 / 05/07/2009 at 7:36am / Israel / Animals

Today, my girlfriend came up to me and told me we would never do anything sexual in our relationship. She said I was too adorable to take seriously in bed. FML

by Anonymous / 03/26/2009 at 12:36pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I realized my friends and I should be more careful what we say around my younger brother. I never thought he was paying attention until today. My stepmom told him it was time to go to bed. He responded, "I think it's time for you to suck one." My brother is 4. FML

by Alex / 03/26/2009 at 12:42am / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, I was leaving to go over to a friend's and my parents suddenly ask if I'm gay. I reply that no, I'm bisexual. My mom then asks if I've ever made out with someone of the same sex and I say yes. She turns to my dad and says 'I told you so. You owe me $20'. My parents bet on my sexuality. FML

by Syferix / 03/18/2009 at 6:42pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I was filling out paperwork with my new doctor. During the questionnaire, she asked if I was sexually active. I said yes. She then asked, "What do you do?" I told her I normally did vaginal, but sometimes anal. She blushed and started to laugh. She was asking where I worked. FML

by whatdoyoudo / 03/16/2009 at 12:39am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was driving on the freeway in the back seat of my friends car. I looked over to the left and was greeted by a van full of adolescent boys waving and making the "call me" hand gesture. I then happened to looked down and realized that my right boob was completely out of my top. FML

by Noname / 03/08/2009 at 3:11am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, my fiancée broke up with me. Via a myspace message. While we were in the same apartment. FML

by loser / 02/28/2009 at 7:22pm / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, my grandmother told me that not only does she not accept me as a homosexual man, but that she feels my relationship with a little person is "spitting in God's face." FML

by iamatthewroberts / 02/16/2009 at 9:34pm / United States (Kentucky) / Love

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

by offbeans / 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I was hooking up with a guy for the first time and he told me I was in luck. When I asked why he replied, "I like little boobs." FML

by miapapaya / 02/15/2009 at 4:44pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy