About Jonah171 : I am Jonah.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
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Today, I had a chest x-ray. I thought everything was okay, that is until the tech gasped slightly and muttered, "Mother of God." I asked him what was wrong, and he kept insisting he had no idea what I was talking about. Now I'm so upset I can't even sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23664) - you deserved it (1453)
On 05/02/2012 at 6:41pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, my son told me he needed a haircut. I was thrilled that he actually requested it, since he normally throws a fit over getting them. He described the cut he wants. It's a mullet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17303) - you deserved it (1913)
On 04/24/2012 at 7:59pm - kids - by DaveAlmighty (man) - United States
Today, after years of waiting, I finally got to meet the band whose music got me through one of the hardest times I have ever experienced. When I turned down the lead singer for sex, they told me to leave. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24359) - you deserved it (8755)
On 04/15/2012 at 3:03am - intimacy - by bummed - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I found out that when my girlfriend said she gave up sex for lent, it was just with me and not my brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30137) - you deserved it (1716)
On 03/25/2012 at 9:11am - intimacy - by ohno - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30460) - you deserved it (8683)
On 03/25/2012 at 8:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, the subject of penis size came up while my boyfriend and I were chatting. He asked if he was big, and I replied that whatever size he was, he was enough to satisfy me. Apparently, that was the wrong answer, and he spent the rest of the night sulking because I didn't say he was enormous. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18364) - you deserved it (8858)
On 03/21/2012 at 12:25pm - intimacy - by tellingthetruth (woman) - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)
Today, I became a father. Unfortunately, my wife found out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6828) - you deserved it (101382)
On 03/10/2012 at 9:16pm - misc - by Major3 (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I discovered that during fire drills, my school lines everyone up next to some extremely flammable and explosive propane tanks. If we ever have a real fire, we will all die. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22696) - you deserved it (1618)
On 02/25/2012 at 11:18pm - misc - by afraidtoburn (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I gave myself a hernia while farting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17091) - you deserved it (4927)
On 02/24/2012 at 3:40am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I tried to impress my wife by doing a bunch of push-ups, despite having a bad shoulder. She told me my form sucks and that I'm an idiot. Now I can barely move my arm and I'm going to have to get it fixed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6436) - you deserved it (19403)
On 02/20/2012 at 12:36pm - love - by WTA (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, my boyfriend's father suggested that, ideally, I should aim to have my baby in early July, or wait until he gets back from Europe in October. I'm due September 4th, and he will be "incredibly disappointed" if he misses the birth of his first grandchild due to my "selfishness". FML
I agree, your life sucks (23844) - you deserved it (1896)
On 02/19/2012 at 3:55am - health - by preggo - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was talking to my husband about a work colleague, whose boyfriend is always sending her flowers and fawning over her. I mentioned how I've never been treated like that. He glanced up from his video game and said, "Shit, Mel. Get a boob job then." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24235) - you deserved it (5733)
On 02/17/2012 at 9:04pm - love - by Mel Ancholy (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I had to tell my mom to stop sending pictures of Jesus to my boyfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23745) - you deserved it (2020)
On 02/11/2012 at 10:01pm - love - by Anon - United States (Arizona)
Today, after I spent nearly three hours building an igloo, my dog decided it would be a nice to enter it and take a shit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19379) - you deserved it (3125)
On 02/09/2012 at 1:37am - animals - by A (woman) - United States
Today, I learnt there's a woman who comes into my store only to hear my Barry White-like voice. My boss knows who it is, yet refuses to tell me because it's "hilarious." I'm now cautious of every customer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16394) - you deserved it (2486)
On 01/30/2012 at 4:00am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Monday 17 June 2013
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