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Jonah171

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Jonah171
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2275
  • Number of comments : 69
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Jonah171 : I am Jonah.

Jonah171's last visitors

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Jonah171's FML badges

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Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

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You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

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Jonah171's favorite FMLs

Today, I was sitting in the park eating a sandwich, when a homeless guy asked me for some spare change. I said I didn't have any. He offered an "erotic striptease" in exchange for my sandwich. I said no. He gave one anyway. I walked back to work on an empty stomach. FML

#15800511
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25441) - you deserved it (5430)

On 04/15/2011 at 10:04pm - work - by :| - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I came out to my parents. They nodded empathetically throughout my entire speech and told me repeatedly that it was okay. As I smiled and stood up, my dad asked, "But you're still going to marry a guy, right?" FML

#15767181
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36222) - you deserved it (7268)

On 04/13/2011 at 6:19am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house to break down and cry because his mother hates me for unknown reasons. I walked in, gave him a long hug, and started sobbing. I then saw his mother. She was visiting him to complain about how terrible a person I am. FML

#15632605
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32208) - you deserved it (4946)

On 04/04/2011 at 5:29am - love - by terrible person -

Today, I got 2 creams for a skin condition. The one for my face says "Don't expose skin to sun after use of this product". The one for the rest of my body says "This product relies on exposure to the sun". In other words, I have to be outside as much as I can, naked and with a box on my head. FML

#15480042
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31091) - you deserved it (5826)

On 03/25/2011 at 8:22am - health - by FromNL (man) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, I went to the hospital as my girlfriends emergency contact. When I saw her, she was under a blanket because she had no pants. She had a seizure in a guy's bed and he brought her here. He's here and she wants us both to stay. FML

#15473081
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48380) - you deserved it (3773)

On 03/24/2011 at 9:30pm - love - by tannerpaul -

Today, I went on a dinner date with the guy I like. He ate all his food then started eating off my plate, going on to eat over half of my food. When the bill came, he made me pay for it. FML

#15250460
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32751) - you deserved it (6693)

On 03/09/2011 at 11:07am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I desperately tried to explain to my boyfriend why he shouldn't talk about the bible during sex. He honestly doesn't understand. FML

#15067918
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32061) - you deserved it (6549)

On 02/21/2011 at 6:15pm - intimacy - by Clare (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I realized how out of shape I am, when I couldn't finish masturbating because I ran out of breath. FML

#14954867
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13601) - you deserved it (54996)

On 02/13/2011 at 4:01am - intimacy - by RyanM - Canada (Alberta)

Today, a police officer gave me a ticket for smoking. He told me that my parents would have to be contacted to come pick me up. My drunk dad came to the rescue, and almost hit the police car. Way to go dad. FML

#14945548
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21521) - you deserved it (15530)

On 02/12/2011 at 3:05am - misc - by savanna(: - United States (Utah)

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by creating an account on Runescape; his favorite game. After finding him in-game, I started talking to him, not revealing who I was. After a while, I asked him if he had a girlfriend. He promptly said no and asked me for nude pics. FML

#14909703
336 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49078) - you deserved it (13034)

On 02/09/2011 at 2:22pm - love - by Samyett (woman) - United States

Today, while at the urinal doing my business, my trousers fell all the way to the ground. As I bent down to pull them back up, my boss walked in the bathroom and thought I was mooning him. FML

#14702634
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21195) - you deserved it (3131)

On 01/24/2011 at 9:33pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I bought something special at Victoria's Secret, then sat in bumper-to-bumper traffic for 2 hours to get to my boyfriend's house. When I got there, he broke up with me. We're 37 years old and he actually gave me the "it's not you, it's me" speech. FML

#14645700
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25459) - you deserved it (2629)

On 01/20/2011 at 12:04am - love - by singleladynow (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, in dance class, the instructor asked me to demonstrate the splits to the group. I slid down, my legs opening wider as I descended. I then loudly farted for the full 5 seconds it took to reach the ground. FML

#14613104
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28151) - you deserved it (5108) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 11:44am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - Switzerland - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my husband invited a couple of his college friends over for dinner. While we were in the middle of eating, one of them asked loudly, "Hey, whatever happened to that fat bitch you dated in your third year?" We've been dating since his second year. FML

#14545720
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32979) - you deserved it (3200)

On 01/11/2011 at 2:06pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I have been teaching my 5 year-old step-daughter how to read and write. She came bounding up to me with a piece of paper and said, "look what I did". It was a letter that said "My dad misses my real mommy, not you". FML

#14478840
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30063) - you deserved it (4343)

On 01/05/2011 at 9:19pm - kids - by yingyang2 - United States



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