This member hasn't filled in the description.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, to punish me for being hungover, my roommate blasted the bagpipe version of "Amazing Grace" through his stereo. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9383) - you deserved it (23247)
On 02/26/2011 at 5:59pm - misc - by jm_track - United States (Montana)
Today, I discovered that I can fit back into the clothes I wore in High School. I was proud of this until my husband told me that I look like a stuffed sausage in them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20175) - you deserved it (7811)
On 02/25/2011 at 9:53am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I went to my son's high school play. The moment I arrived at the auditorium, I shouted out his name to let him know I made it. Thinking I was a student, a teacher yelled, "SHUT UP AND SIT DOWN!" Scared out of my mind, I quickly obeyed, to mass giggling from the kids. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10840) - you deserved it (26957)
On 02/24/2011 at 1:39am - kids - by Annie (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, my parents finally invited my boyfriend over for dinner. Everything was going great until my mother asked him his profession. He stuffed his mouth full of lasagna, snorted, and then responded, "I clean shit for a living." FML
I agree, your life sucks (10512) - you deserved it (15830)
On 12/19/2010 at 2:46am - love - by lovecrisis247 - United States (Texas)
Today, I noticed a picture in an elderly patients room, of a pretty girl in a bikini. Trying to be funny and lighten the mood, I said, "Looks like you have some good eye candy to help you recover faster." With a stern look he replied, "That's my granddaughter." FML
I agree, your life sucks (5738) - you deserved it (21218)
On 11/21/2010 at 5:36pm - work - by BlackRavenWings - United States (West Virginia)
Today, I was walking outside when I saw my best friend about 100 meters away. I began running towards her, arms flailing, screaming out a tribal battle cry. It wasn't until I was nearly on top of her that I realised it was someone else. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7861) - you deserved it (22841)
On 09/17/2010 at 4:33pm - misc - by ellinor (woman) - Sweden (Jonkopings Lan)
Today, I learned that in Japan there are monkeys that wait tables and work at a tavern. Literally, I have a job a monkey can do. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22586) - you deserved it (3965)
On 03/16/2010 at 11:30am - work - by slickboy0023 (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I'm in the hospital because I sliced my leg open. Why? I jumped off my bed and scratched myself on the metal bed frame when Miss America was crowned to Miss Virginia. I'm 20 years old, and a man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5238) - you deserved it (21119)
On 01/31/2010 at 1:37pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my daughter thought that my new and expensive cologne smelled funny. She then decided to empty its contents down the toilet and refill the bottle with "nice-smelling things". I now smell like a mixture of chicken soup, my wife's perfume, tomato sauce and orange juice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23842) - you deserved it (3499)
On 12/26/2009 at 11:34am - kids - by dessaye (man) - Singapore
Today, I was at a family party and everyone was seeing my new glasses for the first time. My 48 year old uncle told me that I look like a hot librarian and then grabbed my ass. He was still sober. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27086) - you deserved it (2151)
On 12/21/2009 at 2:30pm - misc - by frapples1 (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I was at the mall, I saw a girl crying that her ice cream had fallen on the floor. Feeling generous, I bought her a new one. She threw it on the ground, laughed, and came over to her mom and told that I was bothering her, so the mom called security. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29130) - you deserved it (3395)
On 11/09/2009 at 12:49am - misc - by miseventshappen - United States (California)
Today, I visited home. My drunk mother was screaming to my drunk stepdad about a fight four years ago. My little sister was looking in the mirror practicing her "Orgasm face." And the neighbors were dancing outside coked out and naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (61317) - you deserved it (3345)
On 09/19/2009 at 12:55am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I decided to check my email on our family computer. Since my dad's account was already logged on, I chose to use his instead of logging on my own. When opening up a new page and seeing his recently viewed sites, I learned that he loves to watch porn. I also learned he has a foot fetish. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25011) - you deserved it (15787)
On 07/30/2009 at 8:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was looking at my friend's dad's Facebook pictures because he recently posted a status update. I saw him at a bar with some ugly hooker that he was feeling up in almost every picture. After about 10 minutes of ridiculing and laughing at this ugly woman, I realize it's my mom in a wig. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42791) - you deserved it (5865)
On 07/08/2009 at 8:07pm - love - by disturbed2103 (man) - United States (California)
Today, I spotted one of my friends using the ATM outside our school's university center. I crept up behind him, grabbed his shoulders abruptly, and shouted in my best deep man-voice, "Give me all your money!" Turned out to be a poor, unsuspecting freshman. He gave me his money. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8606) - you deserved it (52093)
On 04/22/2009 at 10:22pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Monday 17 June 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
